What are the three qualities you look for in potential boyfriend/girlfriend?

Physical, character, skills, anything. As long as you name just the three most important ones.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • - Physical attraction. She doesn't need to be a 10, but I have to find her physically attractive. What that means exactly will differ from person to person, but most people are attracted to a wide range of types and sizes; not many have a super narrow focus.

    - Personality/attitude. I'm attracted to girls who have a positive attitude and a fun personality. Girls who are negative about everything, or who are depressed or insecure, aren't attractive. No one's life is perfect, and hard times come to all of us, but some people choose to stay positive, and others allow themselves (or even choose) to be destroyed or devastated. I'm only interested in positive people, and it's not my job to change a negative person to a positive one; only THEY can do that.

    - Compatibility. This is the area that most people overlook until it's WAY too late, and it's why most relationships fail. If you aren't compatible, you can have a great relationship for a short period of time, but sooner or later, those incompatibilities will drive you apart.

    Compatibility issues include:

    - what she's looking for in the relationship (ONS, FWB, official relationship, potential marriage, etc.)

    - children

    - career

    - location (where will we live?)

    - religion

    - sex

    - finances

    - family issues & responsibilities

    - future goals

    - health issues

    - past relationship issues

    - lifestyle

    When I meet a girl, I can determine physical attraction almost immediately; I can SEE, and guys are experts at making fast evaluations of physical attractiveness. It takes me less than 5 seconds in most cases to know if she meets "minimum requirements."

    The next thing I do is ask her on a date, and on that date, I focus on getting to know her. For the first several dates, my goal is to talk with each other as much as possible, and in effect, "interview" her and try to see how compatible we are, as well as what her personality and attitude are like. During this time, I intentionally hold back on developing feelings for her, because I have no idea if this is going to work out, and if it doesn't, I need to be able to let her go and move on.

    Only after a couple of dates, when we've covered my list of compatibility issues and I've determined that we are compatible (meaning, we'll be able to find compromises in the areas where we clash/disagree), do I open myself up to letting my feelings for her grow. It's also much safer to do that at that point, because you aren't likely to have any nasty surprises come up later. She'll feel the same way, and that will make her much more secure in the relationship, because she'll have learned by then that I'm honest and open, and that she can ask me anything.

    It does you no good to meet and fall in love with someone if you aren't going to have compatible lives. If I want to live in the US, and she wants to live in Europe, it won't work. If I want 5 kids, and she wants none, it won't work. Etc. You need to know that stuff before you get attached.

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What Guys Said 7

  • 1) A decent bod. A woman who takes care of herself is attractive. It also means she'll be able to take care of me should the need ever arise. I spend hours upon hours keeping my body in shape. I'd ask anyone who wants to date me to do the same.

    2) Integrity and loyalty. Don't give me any reason to doubt either of those two. I don't want to spend all day wondering if you're hanging out with your ex when you know it's not a good idea. I don't want to have to find out what you've been doing second hand through Facebook or mutual friends. Be honest and be courteous. Loyalty also means you'll stand up for me. I hate when girls sit back quietly while their friends rag on their boyfriends, especially if I am said boyfriend. I don't let my friends trash talk you, especially not to your face. I'm not a running joke for you girlfriends' amusement.

    3) Sexual openness. How can you have a relationship and not have sex? That's a core part of any relationship and you can't start a family any other way(adoption isn't really my thing). Sex is the ultimate form of physical intimacy. I'm a freak in the sheets... and on the dinning room table, the kitchen floor, the sofa, anywhere I think sounds hot. Be ready for it or stand aside for someone who is.

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  • Without strong character, intelligence, and faith, she doesn't stand a chance. Lacking any of these is way more intolerable and exhausting than lack of amazing looks, etc. And political and other beliefs, while important, have proven changeable :)

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  • Physical not really anything specific if I'm attracted to them.Skills? not sure what your asking communication skills I guess...Character she's a sweet natured kind sensitive person that is honest with me no matter what but is nice about it.

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  • personality is my number one

    height is my second I like girls who are shorter then me

    loyal till the end is my third one

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  • The perfect girl would be attractive,have a good job,and unable to speak(a mute).

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  • No bodybuilders.

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  • -Hot friends

    -Good at cooking

    -Good at sex

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What Girls Said 3

  • -Smurt

    -Funny

    -Down to earth

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  • Confident

    Friendly

    Trustworthy

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  • 1. Honest

    2. Caring

    3. Easy going

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