I am 29 years old. I have been in a few relationships as well as being married and divorced. I live in Illinois. I have been single for over a year and am looking. But when I look around where I have been looking it seems that being the good guy isn't what is wanted anymore. Am I dreaming or is the want of a good man by a woman dying? Is it diminishing? Is it fading? I look and I see all of what I have fought against and stand against becoming more and more abundant and the good if not great guys are being pushed aside...has this what it has become? Are there any women out there still looking for the good guy or has it just become another memory and a faded dream? Where has the value of a good guy gone? And what the heck has taken its place? I know I'm still kind of young but it wasn't this bad when I was a kid. What happened around here? I honestly hope I can find someone that looks for the good guy rather than the bad man that would hurt a woman or treat them like crap. Its not me and I certainly don't agree with it. Where are the women looking for good guys these days? Ladies...were still around just a lot harder to find apparently. Do you still look for the good guy or are you just going with the flow now and afraid of going for something different compared to the new social norm?
Most Helpful Girl
Of course there are women out there who are looking for a good man. Just because you're struggling to find one that you're attracted to, it doesn't mean that there are none. And as one anon girl here already said, it seems that a lot of men have become very bitter, passive aggressive, doormat men who expect a girlfriend to fall in their laps just because they themselves think that they "deserve it" because they're "nice". Just take a look at like 50% of the questions asked here by men (often anonymously). Lots of them whine about not finding a woman, and cry about "bad guys" taking all of them.
It's good that you know your flaws, but there is always room for improvement. I'm not saying you should change all of yourself, I'm just saying that sometimes you can change for the better with one particular personality trait. It sounds harsh, but there are lots of people out there who won't accept every single flaw that you have, even though you do. Also, I've always been a firm believer in the saying "actions speak louder than words". If you really are as good and nice as you say, you wouldn't have to prove yourself by talking about it verbally. You would show it in your actions instead, as well as your actual behavior. I've seen and met SO many guys that have said "really, I'm a nice guy", but when it comes down to it, they're all talk and no action. Don't be one of those guys, because you wrote quite the essay there on your supposedly good traits.
Also, I think it's good that the good women are hard to get, that they won't just fall easily into your lap. You're supposed to work hard for the good things in life, and not be entitled to it just because you personally think you're this and that. The good women are SUPPOSED to be special, just like the good guys are. They wouldn't be good nor special if they came that easily to you, know what I'm saying?0