How do learn to love yourself?

Lately I've been in a bit of a slump. I'm having a really difficult time with self acceptance and self love. When I look in the mirror all I see are flaws and I don't see the beauty in myself. Its strange b/c sometimes I have all the confidence in the world but lately its just not there.

So what can I do to pull myself out of this funk? What kind of things can I do to rebuild my confidence? What kind of things do you do to make you feel really great about yourself?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You don't. First, ditch the concepts of self-love and acceptance. They are cheesy convoluted nonsense. Don't get me wrong, it's important to have self-respect and self-awareness but these aren't those cornball terms used to illicit and evoke emotions.

    Next, look in the mirror, but instead of trying to "see" something just take it in. There are flaws. There is beauty. It is all there. Think of it as looking at a tiny corner of a portrait instead of the whole picture, this is what happens when you look for something in the mirror and only find a something instead of taking in the glory of the whole image. It isn't so much "no one is perfect" or any cheese like that as it is a standard of wholeness. Your eyes may look horrible by themselves. However when combined with your smile there is something. Combined with your skin. Combined with your imperfections and your perfections. Is this not how moles work? Beauty marks? Imperfections and blemishes capitalized upon?

    You come with plenty for free.

    So instead of trying to get out of the funk, get in it, get deep in it, and reach the core. Get ugly with yourself and take note of the good, the bad, the ugly, of the wanted and unwanted, and then make a truce not to "Accept" but to realize, not to "love" but to respect. For if you are honest without boundaries to yourself and respect yourself enough to relish in that honesty you will grow.

    Otherwise it's just all distractions. "Go find yourself" etc. You're right here. How far away from you did you plan to go?

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What Guys Said 3

  • What would you say to your best friend if she expressed these insecurities to you?

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  • Travel, go camping try something new. Those things always seem to make people happy. I took a mate away camping who was going through a hard time and he came back in a lot better state.

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  • you are very beautiful

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What Girls Said 5

  • good question.

    loving urself in terms of ur flaws can b done in 1 of 2 major ways.

    1. LOOKING BEYOND UR FLAWS: this means that u draw ur attention to ur assets. whatever it is. and u enhance them so that they stand out and overpower any flaws u may have. the attention of other people will also b controlled by u in this way.

    2. EMBRACING UR FLAWS: they make u human. they make u unique. ur flaws are different to someone else's. what u have, someone may b wishing to have. imperfection is beautiful. of course, this doesn't mean u dont do anything about flaws which have the potential to be fixed, but it means that u accept yourself as u originally are.

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  • i ask myself what good does is it to look down on myself. what is there to gain from it? does it make me feel better to point out flaws? id be wasting my time doing something pointless. i dont feel the need to classify myself either. am i funny? no. am i pretty? no. do i have to ask myself that? no. i dont make myself feel awesome. but i dont make myself feel horrible either. i just accept who i am because there's nothing i can do about it and even if i could, why should i change it for you? i like being this way.
    you live for yourself, not for others.

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  • Its called you go to therapy , and try things like transcendental Meditation because that helps people find inner peace.

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  • Oh my gosh you are so beautiful! Don't feel bad about yourself! at least physically speaking.. you're a 10!

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  • Get in touch with nature, get away from the phone and internet and just do my own thing.

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