Does a guy come off as unattractive if he's unsuccessful with women?

Does a guy come off as unattractive if he's unsuccessful with women?

I know you girls love a girl that has tons of female attention and options.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • it really depends on the situation

    like if he's like a guy who's a player, and because of it, he's unsuccessful, well then yes, he appears as unsuccessful in my eyes because he is screwed, every other woman who knows he's this type of sh*t, won't go out with him

    on the other hand

    if he's the type to try hard to be a good boyfriend but the girls he goes out with just don't appreciate him for who he is, well then, there really isn't anything you can do with it. and he doesn't necessarily mean he's unattractive

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What Girls Said 13

  • well I really don't care if they have a big past or none at all when it comes to women. but usually the guys that don't hvae a past are unconfident and don't know how to approach women or even hold up a conversation with them that would actually interest us. but those guys that have no past or nearly nopast should be the ones that are attractive becuase you know they will be faithful.

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  • You mean "I know you girls love a GUY that has tons of female attention and options." ? Actually, his success with women doesn't make me think any higher or lower of a guy. What matters is how he treats me and interacts me.

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    • Agreed.

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    • In an experiment... When people were implanted with a subconscious suggestion that they get a coke... All of the people would go and fetch a coke. Upon return the experimenter would ask them why they got a coke. And they would all have *concious* reasons like "ehmmm, I was thirsty", "mmm, it was the cheapest thing at the machine", "mmm, well, I like coke", "I haven't drank it in a while, so I felt like it" - And they insisted it was their own idea, even though it was implanted hypnotically.

    • Alright AlekNovy, I have better things than to get into this with you. So at this point I'm going to disagree and leave it at that. Good luck on your crusade here. I am agreeing to disagree and squash this issue. Neither one of us is going to budge.

  • i don't like guys surrounded by girls and always flirting and like that !...

    i would say I like guys who have the ability to attract as many girls as they want but still they don't use it to gather girls around them for being more popular and attractive.

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    • I agree with this. That's a good distinction, and it shows honesty.

      You said: "i would say I like guys who have the ability to attract as many girls as they want but still they don't use it to gather girls around them for being more popular and attractive."

      This is the next level, and its a level you can reach once you can control your natural desires. I like that you admit you still would like to know he's *able* to do it if he wanted to.

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    • I would be attracted when I know how many girls are trying to get the guy yet he is strong enough to control himself & doesn't use his ability to be popular or let others think he is attractive, that makes him attractive; the power and charisma he shows. yet how weak he would be around the girl HE likes " this means that even with all the attention he get from others he has feelings that are really true and would be much appreciated to know he just cares for me not for his popularity"

    • Poseidon, that's not what she said.

      She said she wants him to have the *ability*. You're not getting the distinction. Its like "I want a girlfriend that's so hot, that she can have any guy on the planet, but she chose me".

      Do you get it? I'm not saying I want my girl to have been with a ton of guys, lol. I'm just saying I want her to have had the CHOICE. Its helps me (chocolate-lover) know that we're not settling. He/she is with me, because she chose me, not because she/he is settling for us.

  • Ads long as he's nice.

    I mean, if he's unsuccessful with women because he's a jerk, or a pervert..then yes, that makes him unattractive...but if it's because he's shy, or just isn't all that great with words, then no.

    I honestly don't care if a guy is good with women in general, every woman is different...and if he's good with me, and not a jerk, then no, he's not unattractive.

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  • sometimes, but generaly only if the guy comes off like he's trying too hard. If he doesn't have loads of female attention but seems not to care that can sometimes be attractive, like he doesn't buy in to the whole competitive guy thing and is already secure in himself. That's my opinion anyway.

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  • i personally don't care if he's had no gf's or 500 gf's. actually id rater have a unsucessful guy so I know he isn't a player

    hope this helped

    xox

    rachael

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  • I actually like guys who are more unexperienced. There usually sweeter and less likely to take advantage of you. In fact, the guy I like now has NEVER had a girlfriend before me and I love him to death. It depends on what type of girl she is and what she is attracted to. But, it's not a bad thing.

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  • I don't think it matters myself. Actually, I'd prefer the unsuccessful guy so I don't have to worry about anyone stealing my man!

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  • well sometimes

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  • I've liked people that none of my friends have liked so really it doesn't bother me. The whole concern with status and popularity appears a little juvenile.

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  • Well, yes. It does hamper his attractiveness unfortunately.

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  • Slightly because it makes you notice maybe why girls haven't been with him, you know?

    But it doesn't make a man-whore sexy because he has lots of lady attention.

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    • Ask that to the manwhore who bags him nth girl.

  • it depends on what the girl is looking for and what she is like

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What Guys Said 4

  • Here's a simple experiment. To refresh this subject from the other stuff :)

    To answer your question, do the following. Go to single female friends of yours (individually of course), and tell them you want to introduce them to a friend of yours.

    Tell them that he is:

    -Funny

    -Charismatic

    -Communicative

    -Successful

    -PhD at 24 years old

    -Artsy

    -And he hasn't had a date in 10 years, kissed a girl and is still a virgin

    What do you suppose their first reaction will be? For most girls (not all, but a huge majority)... their first question will be "What's wrong with him!?". Again, women will say they don't use a guy's previous romantic success as a barometer **whatsover!**, but the truth will show you differently.

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    • It's not that one of his friends sees him as being funny, charismatic and so on that for me as a girl I would see those qualities the same as he sees. it differs form one to another what charismatic means? and what funny is supposed to be ?

      i would like to know a guy doesn't date and never kissed and still a virgin another girl would come up and say exactly as you said "what's wrong with him" another 'd believe the great quality because girls tend to be affected by others opinion.

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    • Women in general I can see but every woman? No sorry. What stuns me is that in the above paragraph you actually say, "*Most girls*" yet for some reason you can't seem to let it go when I refuse to succumb to what you think and say that I do use it as a factor. Interesting.

    • Shlei, why are you so intent on proving that you're illiterate/incapable of basic logic?

      The above experiment I say most women would ASK it as their first QUESTION. Not that (only) most women would have it as a factor. But that most women would have it as a high enough factor to immediately blurt out a "what's wrong with him"

      Some women would have it as such a low factor (you) that you would never even ask the question, but its still a factor.

  • I don't know if you'll get an honest answer from girls. They'll say they hate playas and/or a guy who's always surrounded by girls.

    But both experience and science will tell you different. The more women a guy is seen with, the more attractive he's rated. The exact same guy when alone and when with girls, will be rated completely diferrently by girls. Tons of science and studies on this.

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    • I'd like to see those studies :P

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    • ""Because of the fact that if you took all my past exes and who I was attracted to range in their popularity and status"""

      You still don't get it... Your exes prove you don't have it as major (concious) and superficial factor. I never said its THE factor or a determining factor. Read carefully - its *a* factor, and its subconscious. To claim it has NO impact is complete dishonesty. You're confusing this with the claim that all women are superficial (major concious factor) - not our topic here.

    • I don't think you know what you are saying at all. I didn't say it was THE factor either. It's not a factor at all so please get over the fact that I and many others don't fit what you want to prove here. It's not going to happen.

  • yes it s called pre-selection if a girl sees that you are unsuccesful with other woman she will beleive that you will be unsuccesful with her and not spend her time and effort on you

    never never never mention a bad relationship to a woman.

    not to be cold but this si the way the female brain is wired personaly I wouldn't care as a hederosexual male but its just female phsychology that has been proven by study and research

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  • Depends on the girl, really.

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