Guys, do you know when a girl is flirting?

so, I've been attempting to make it blatantly obvious that I'm interested in this guy. I've heard guys are obvilious,

is this always the case?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Most guys have a hard time telling the difference of a flirt vs a girl being nice. In these situations, as obvious as you think you are, you aren't being enough.

    I've listened to my friends say " I don't understand how he can't know, I smile and make appoint to ask about his day, what else can I do?" The guy for all he knows is you being a nice chatter box.

    Although I know this, personally if I am not looking to meet someone, my flirting radar is out the window. I know girls, even if they aren't looking, can detect a guy flirting with them. Guys however, if not in the right state of mind won't have a clue.


What Guys Said 13

  • I have always said, "O no, I'm on the ball, id never miss someone flirting with me". However recently a old friend came on to me, and said she had been flirting for years. HAD SHE? I think it depends on the guys outlook, I have noticed in the past, and you always need to be careful that if a guy is oblivious that they are not doing it on purpose, to avoid any awkward rejections.

    I think you should just say to him how you feel, in a cool way.

  • What's "blatantly obvious" to you is not going to be blatantly obvious to a guy. Guys and girls communicate differently.

    • i'm super awkward, and he knows that, I laugh, talk to him, maintain eye contact, I make contact [usually to his back, he sits in front of me]. I like most of his jackets, and I've told him this, I text him.. I'm.. flirty. I don't really know what else to do. thoughts?

  • I notice when I leave a bar when I really think about it lol

  • I'm actually in a similar situation now myself. Although with my own case I think I might be getting played. The length of time varies. I mean if he doesn't feel all that close to you he probably won't make a move. You can subtly hint by asking him what he will be doing over the weekend, later, etc. That indicates you are interested in what he does. I would say move on if it feels like he's using you for convenience, not excited (I light up when I'm around someone I like), or short.

  • Sorry I didn't mean to imply you were playing games. I think you are being sincere. If he doesn't get the idea before long move on. Guys can be oblivious but with the right amount of reinforcement he (or someone else) will come around and ask you out. I guess right now just focus on getting to know him and being his friend. From there who knows.

    • whats too long? do you think that he's just being nice?

      i would consider what he does flirting,

      i'm not sure if he's interested or considers me his muse.

  • Yes, guys are oblivious. What you may think of as flirting a guy may take as being friendly or coincidence. My best advice is to be direct without being demanding. Guys hate games just like women do.

    • i don't want to play games, and I don't consider this 'playing a game', I'm not flirty, and then ignore him. I'm usually consistent, but honestly.. I don't really have the balls to ask him out.

  • I'm never really SURE when a girl is into me. I have to sit and think about it for a second, and even then it's difficult to tell. We don't KNOW, we just get a general feeling, if we're aware at all.

  • Yes we are oblivious at times, message me if you want to talk about it :)

  • Nope. I don't.

  • It is true that often it becomes hard for us guys to differentiate between flirty and friendly and because we are often afraid of rejection, we tend to perceive it as friendly I think, at least in my experiences. You just need to be more obvious about your interests. Guys need girls to show them they truly are interested because we are afraid of rejection. Guys love when girls are physical with them, so if I were you I'd escalate attempts on being physical. Nothing makes a guy sure a girl likes her more than when she starts being very physical and close. Depending on how comfortable you guys are already that should help determine what kinda physical contact you could get away with. If you get a chance to touch or grab his hand, that's a biggie.

  • How obvious? Be VERY obvious if he wants to talk to you he would do you tbh.

  • Well I can assure you that I for one was oblivious to loads of flirting and indicators of interest a girl once shown me (was last Xmas eve) until I went home that night and starting doing research on body language and flirting techniques women use.

    We became friends and saw each other every now and then, but the flirting soon died and so did her attraction for me.

    Found out the other night that she only see's me as a friend now which put a major downer on my Christmas :(

    Anyway I'm ranting now, yes a lot of us will be oblivious unless we have done our homework first, so if you meet an idiot like me you may need to spell it out in C A P I T A L S!

    • could I get your age? he's kind of older, and we sometimes talk. we were suppose to hang out a couple times. we were planning for last tuesday, on Sunday he'd keep me updated and didn't.

      but started a convo today. I don't think he does his research, but I don't think he's completely oblivious.

      he struck up a conversation with me today.

    • Show All
    • I would message, but unfortunately you answered anonymously. He send really mixed signals. He starts conversation, but I asked him to hang out outside of class during finals week, followed up (because he said he was free most of the week). He didn't get back to me with his hours, and then I asked one last time. We were talking about Tuesday (hanging out), but he didn't let me know his schedule.

      If he wants to hang out, he'd make it happen, eh?

    • I'm no longer anonymous, see above!

What Girls Said 2

  • not always but if the guy is not into you he might play stupid and act like he is not getting the hint, or the guy probably knows your flirting but is to shy or nervous to flirt back...

  • i think if done consistently, and you see him in person a lot and act differently around him versus others, he might get the hint...

    also experienced guys are very good and picking up signals, especially jerks and players argh be careful!