Does my boyfriend HATE me?!?! Please help!!!!!

So something is VERY wrong! My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 months and I really like him, and for a while he seemed to really like me. But recently he's been acting really distant and it's super hard to talk to him. Does my boyfriend hate me?

In the past 2 weeks:

* he brings up old double dates he had with his ex-gf, his best friend Steve and Steve's girlfriend Britt in front of me

* he won't hold hands with/cuddle/hug/kiss me... even in private

* he always tries to get his Steve and Britt to double with us... like all the time... for everything, Steve is actually getting annoyed with it, and I've been annoyed with it

* he forgot our 4 month

* he didn't pay for their dinner the last couple of double dates we had out to dinner

* we're almost never alone, there always seem to be his friends around

* he keeps adding classes and activities: he's already taking 18 hours, teaching 2 instruments, VP of a club on campus, and in 2 bands... and he just added 3 more hours of classes

* he's not interested in making out with me for the past two weeks

* He's kept his ex's lovey stuff all over his facebook profile (he broke up with her in MAY) and he won't change his myspace to 'in a relationship' (we've been dating since SEPT)

* this weekend his roommate was gone and my roommate was gone... hmmm- two empty rooms... we still slept alone in our respective dorms

* he totally blew off a lunch we had together, on purpose

What should I do?!

Yeah, I know he doesn't HATE me hate me. Does he want to break up? I've been concerned that he hasn't moved on from his ex-girlfriend the whole time, but I'm a little insecure so I thought it was just me being weird. With this new behavior I'm concerned.


Most Helpful Girl

  • ur right he doesn't hate you, he's just too chicken to tell you to your face that he's not over his ex an doesn't want to be with u. he's putting as much distance between you two as possible probably in the hopes that ull get the hint an end it. all the signs are there you listed them above. he won't even acknowledge ur in a relationship. he won't touch you in private. he won't even be alone with u. I mean come on don't have to b a rocket scientist to tell he doesn't want to b with you and e more. an I know its not what you want to hear an it hurts believe me I know I've been down that road. trying to hold on to something that's not there an everyone can tell you wake up leave him. but because you care about him you just can't because you keep hoping hell change or you think you can change him or you think if you stay things will get better. because ur insecure you think I'm not going to get and e one else or I don't want and e one else or this could b my only chance. that's the problem with insecure people we always take the worst from everyone because we don't believe we deserve and e better. try ur best to move on an find someone worthy of you itll b hard but everyone deserves to b happy an obviously you aren't happy. don't you think you deserve to b, deep down inside and e way. I wish you the best take care.


What Guys Said 2

  • maybe instead of forgetting you 4 month, he just realized the insignificance of it...

  • I believe your question is "what should I do?" My two cents worth: Find out what's causing him to sabotage your relationship. If he won't cooperate, find another boyfriend.


What Girls Said 7

  • Have you tried talking to him about it? That's the best thing that you could do. You have nothing to lose, after all. If he really was planning on breaking up with you, at least you'd be able to find out without having this drag on.

    From what you've said, the situation doesn't seem too good. BUT there's always a reason that things happen. I remember when I was starting off in a relationship, there was a time period when my boyfriend was really distant, and it wasn't because he wasn't interested anymore but because we were getting too close too quickly (and I thought I was the only one who was scared). But everything worked out once I talked to him about it. Besides, 4 months is not really a determinant period for a relationship yet, so maybe he's just afraid. Whether this is the case or not, though, I would strongly advise you to talk to him about this.

    Good luck!

  • well since he is your boyfriend he doesn't HATE you, but the things he's doing ARE strange. my advice is to just talk to him. tell him what's been ok your mind. it's the only way you'll get the answers you deserve.

  • are you two still together now, after its been a year? what's an update? I wanna see if it worked out and was all a bunch of misunderstandings? or if it was actually him trying to break up... :)

  • He's afraid of his feelings for you. Things are moving too quickly. Don't worry, just do you. Have fun, hang with friends. Let him see what he's missing out on. If he doesn't come around, you're worth more and deserve to be treated kindly. Communication is key to any successful relationship and although rejection hurts, there is something better waiting for you if you just practice self love and drop your expectations.

  • it doesn't look good, but maybe its not eniterly to do with you. id wait out a little longer, 'asses the situation' then talk to him about it, in a calm way. gd luck tho.

  • To be honest, it doesn't sound too good.
    I think the best thing you could do is try and talk to him about it and try and get him to talk about what's on his mind and what's made him change. A much better option than just putting up with his behaviour.
    Also, have you done anything differently at all or anything to annoy him?
    I know how you feel because this has happened to me before and it really hurt. You really need to find out what's going on and not let this drag out.
    Hope I help x