Guys, how long does it often take you to get over your crush?

Let's say, you are a guy who gets hit on quite often. You are open to casual hang-outs, hook-ups but really picky when it comes to committed relationship and somehow you are a commitment phobe. You have a crush on this one girl. You used to work together for about a year and meet daily (not talked just felt attracted to her and gave eye contacts every now and then) before she changed her job. Then you went out for only a couple dates. She is special and different from other girls, like she is attractive and has a personality that you highly respect and truly admire (you also told her so). She truly really likes you and she confessed to you about it but she said she just wants to be friends because for some serious reasons, she wasn't ready. Since then both of you cut off contacts (say, you are a slow moving guy and has hard time expressing feelings and she has to abstain from contacting you because she is afraid of getting hurt). My question is, how long can you get over her since there is no contact between you two, and you have a very busy (working) life? A couple weeks? A couple months? Appreciate any advice. Thanks.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • For me, it didn't take long to get over the first girl I liked in college. She and I had already been friends for a while. I asked her out and got shot down not long before leaving for summer break and we lived about three hours away from each other. All told, it was probably about a month or two.

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What Guys Said 9

  • I only get over my crush/infatuations if I cut them out of my life for a while.

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  • For men the only way is finding a stronger crush. Otherwise it can last forever. We tend to be loyal to our feelings.

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    • true but girls can be even worse because they become obsessive and can stalk and do other stuff too.

    • for us is easy to escape those tho. all you have to do is act a bit needy and complement them, lol

  • I don't think that men get crushes really. Liking a girl is different from being infatuated.

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    • I know the difference between liking a girl and falling for her. I got rejected by my crush. Damn, it so hard. It has already been 2 weeks and I am so heartbroken that my heart is being torn. :( If that's isn't a real crush then I don't know.

      I really wanted to be with her. I would do anything about myself, change anything, to get her acceptance. I have tried almost everything, but it's so hard to just forget about her when I really were in love with her for a month before I got rejected. :'(

    • I'm sorry @Lonelywolf21 If you want to send me a pm, I may be able to help you later on.

  • i don't tend to get crushes, I like someone or I don't so its not that easy just to get over it. so for me its not a time span its more whenever the next girl I like comes along

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    • I can say the same about me. It took be 8 years to fall in love with a girl again, and this time it were for real. But it's so sad that you get rejected without getting a chance at all. It's heartbreaking and it feel like you heart is gonna get torn apart. :'(

  • Months. I rarely find people I am attracted to on an emotional level. When I do I know its real and it takes me a while to get that out of my mind.

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  • Until I find a stronger crush, I still think about her subconsciously.

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  • Couple months usually I suppose.

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  • This one girl I like I've had a crush on for a year and I think she's still crushing on me because her friend always grabs her and tries to push her towards me and I think its cute lol but I don't have what it takes to talk to her. forever aloner here.

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