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How can I tell him I don't want to go to his house?

I'm 17 and I'm involved with an 18 year old guy I met a few months ago, and he's told me a lot that he loves me. A few weeks ago, he asked me if I... Show More

Most Helpful Opinion

  • I'd hope that if you're involved in him it is under the presumption that he truly has changed... that said I think, especially if he still lives in the gang environment, that you are only asking for unecessary trouble.

    Even if things go great, do you want to keep going into an environment where you may not feel comfortable? You should either tell him to come to your area/place or if you do go to his area only with lots of friends.

    It sounds like you like him so it's hard to say this but the situation just doesn't sound safe enough to take the risk.

What Guys Said 4

  • If you're not confident in your physical safety, say so, and stand your ground.

    I'd also be really reluctant to be with anyone with a gang/drug history because even if they got clean their friends and associates will be dangerous as hell.

  • Just be honest with him

  • Tell him directly. No need to beat around the bush.

What Girls Said 2

  • I'd be a little worried about getting involved with this guy period, much less go to his house. I'd just be straight forward and honest with him. Tell him that, considering it's your first date, you'd prefer to meet somewhere a little more neutral. Tell him you don't go to guy's houses so quickly and that it's your way of getting to know someone and taking it slow. If you two progress further, you'll consider going.

    Simply make it more of an early-on respect thing. Most first dates don't begin as people's houses (except maybe in college because we were all too broke lol). If he's not understanding, he's not the kind of guy you want to be hanging out with anyway. Pick the gentlemen.

  • Just tell him you don't feel comfortable going there alone or say your parents prefer if you meet him at a coffee shop or go to a movie or something like that (if you are sure you like this guy enough). Or even invite him to come to your house- if he likes you, HE should be coming to see you, or at least offer to walk you from the train or wherever.

    If you are sure you want to go there, he should at least pick you up. If it's an unsafe town/neighbourhood do not go there alone, especially since you don't even know the exact location of his house.

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