Is she using me or is she really over her ex?

okay I'm talking to this girl we go to high school together both seniors we've been talking for a while about 3 months, the probably is she just got of a serious relationship 7 months ago. I ask her is she still in love with her ex and she says no, but I go check her twitter page and I saw a tweet that he favorited that she wrote it said " through thick and thin ill always have you, love you forever and a day you know who you are". I asked her about it she said it was what she was feeling at the moment. The problem is the dated for 3 years and I don't think she's over him. I've heard 2 weeks ago she went to his job and was talking to him was grabbing him and asking for a hug but he denied it. The first time we hung out was like last month and the first picture me and her took together she made it her profile picture. I made her delete his number so she can try to move on. I don't know if she's over her ex, or is she just using me... Before I made her delete the number I saw a text where she said she would hang out with him but instead she hung out me, and she was telling him "i love you" and all this other stuff but this was last month she said she dk when was the last time they talked and she is more focus on us, she supports me at my bball games, she's always writing on my Facebook wall and all this stuff. I asked her if she was over him and she said yes... but do you think she's using me to try and get over him. he graduated 2 years ago so I see her everyday at school. so that's a plus. but do you think she's using me.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I think you already know the answer.


    When I was 15 I did similar stuff like this, knew I had that one best guy mate who was in-love with me and would do absolutely anything to make me happy, and when I got out of a serious relationship I was completely f***ed up. I lead him on with no intentions of being with him, nothing.

    Now I'm not saying this is the right thing to do, I'm just saying that us girls are emotionally screwed sometimes, and it makes us feel powerful and desirable and in hope to take our mind off things and try to get over some people.

    But by the sound of it she hasn't gotten over her ex at all.

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What Girls Said 10

  • Simple and short. She's using you, you deserve better, POST her. She's in a vulnerable state at the moment and she would basically cling to any guy now in order to just move on. Until she's ready for a relationship, she can come back to you. For now, tell her how you feel, tell her what she should do and let her go. Tell her you aren't going to be used, you're a human being with feelings too. She must stop being selfish... Just be friends and be there for her AS A FRIEND, until you think she's moved on. You will know when that time is.. trust your instincts. Don't take a woman's crap.*

  • I don't think she's using you, I just don't think she would do that to you and that she is genuinely confused about her feelings- maybe she finds comfort in you,but she definitely isn't over her ex just yet. She will eventually get over him though, it takes a while esp if she has came out of a 3 year relationship. Talk to her and tell her how you feel.

  • There's nothing worse than trying to date someone that is in love with someone who is not you. It sucks :(

  • Yea I think your intuition is right. She's not 100% over him. If you're just dating, maybe start dating other people. I always found it a waist of time if someone isn't completely devoted to you. To them you're just a "filler". She's going to keep denying it and I'm going to assume she's under 18 as well. So she hasn't reached that level of maturity where she can be honest with herself. If she can't be honest about her feelings for ex, chances are she is or will be dishonest about other things.

  • well if they dated for 3 years she probably knows his number by heart... I still remember the number of my ex from 2 years ago who I dated for a year. 2nd if you keep up the insecurities your going to push her away. and 3rd if your not comfortable in the relationship then end it its clearly not working out...

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