Why did he choose her instead of me? I wish I knew

I was casually hooking up with my neighbor for a while. I didn't know hardly anything about him I'm just extremely attracted to him. I ended up getting kind of attached to him though because the sex was amazing. Then he started ignoring me for a while. I finally texted him yesterday and asked why he's been ignoring me. He told me he has a girlfriend now. I kind of suspected it but it was definitely like a slap in the face. I just wish I knew what he saw in her that he didn't see in me. I'm sure she slept with him right away too. I don't get it. To make matters worse he lives literally right across the hall and I can tell when his girlfriend is here. Can someone give me insight?

Okay so all my friends think that he probably cheated on his girlfriend with me and it makes the most sense. It also makes me feel more horrible. If I'd of known he had a girlfriend I wouldn't have done that.


Most Helpful Girl

  • If you didn't know hardly anything about him then how do you know how long he was dating her/knew her before they slept together? I don't think it's safe to say she jumped in the sack just as soon as you did, it's a possiblity that can't be ignored.

    If you don't know what someone's intentions are, and you might feel more for them than just a casual aquaintance, then it's wise to hold off on the physical stuff, until those boundaries are more defined. If he's truly interested in you for more than a hookup, he should call you, make plans ahead of time, do things with you outside of his or your home . . . basically start showing you that you are a priority to him and that he really cares for you.

    If you sleep with someone to soon, sometimes that's all it takes to kill a blossoming romance. What was once a mystery becomes not so, too soon, and it's easy to wonder who else was given goods so easily, or just to purely lose interest.

    All of that aside though, is the most basic thing of all. You absolutely cannot compare yourself to anyone else and expect to gain any insight from it, which is why, "why her not me" is a question that leads you no where, except to cause more hurt and frustration.

    You are a unique individual, as is she and attraction does not need a reason. People like who they like. Him choosing her over you is about HIM, it is in no way a reflection of you.

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      Well if that's the case then he's definitely not worth your tears! I've been there girl, it sucks, live and learn.