Is it more masculine to hook up with lots of girls?

Just sex with no commitment, I mean.

Does it make a guy more masculine to be into no-strings-attached sex with as many girls as possible? Is it wuss-like to rather be seriously dating one girl before having sex?

I mean, I'm a guy, I have my impulses, don't get me wrong--but I would much rather be in a real relationship, with a cute nice girl, who I know loves me.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Not at all.

    I see a lot of guys my age that are with one girl one day, then the next the next day ... in short, they change them more often than underwear. This sort of behavior is a turn-off for MOST girls (at least the decent ones). Not only will they have no trust for you, but you will seem insecure, flimsy, undecisive and superficial. Well, that, my friend, is the exact opposite of being masculine.

    I also see several guys who are in good, stable relationship and act well towards their girlfriend. They're protective of them, seem happy and loving. They have also decided on ONE girl, which makes me think they must have strong and determined characters, and definitely know what they want. Such guys I see as far more masculine.

    The myth that men who hook up with a lot of women are "studs" might have been true once. But it looks pretty idiotic these days - this is also true for women who go and sleep with a new guy every day.

    It says a lot about the person ... and it isn't good things.

    So if you want to be in a serious, long-lasting relationship, go for it. :) Most girls would feel respect for a guy like you.

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What Girls Said 51

  • oh good lord. please don't do that. I don't date guys I've known have hooked up with anything that has 2 legs and walks. it's unhygenic and it shows how emotionally detached he is from having sex that I wouldn't want him and I'd probably tell him to get checked, no offense.

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  • I don't think so at all. To me, a real man is someone who isn't afraid of expressing himself to a girl, someone who isn't fearful of being loyal, someone capable of having an actual lasting relationship. It takes a lot more strength and intelligence to do any of these things than to simply have sex with anything that moves. Masculinity is defined by strength, not weakness.

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  • It depends. If you want to be popular among your guy friends I guess hooking up with every girl you see would do that, but girls talk to each other and eventually no girl will be willing to get with you because they know your just going to use them. But I guess this all depends on the size of the place you live and whether you are happy never having anything serious with a girl.

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    • Well...i live in one of the biggest cities in the world and...no, I'd never be happy with just casual relationships.

  • I wouldn't say masculine...but I prefer a guy with lots of experience with sex! sex is important in arelationship so the more you know and the more practice you have had...makes me a happier woman. I feel being in a real relationship is way better than just lots of no-strings-attached sex but sometimes that's just what you need. Many women are turned off by telling them how many women you have been with, because we then feel like just another fling. So be cautious telling women you have had lots of flings, we want to think you are just that GREAT at sex naturally! LOL!

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  • no guys that are like that are man whores, guys that say no gives risks and makes the girl respect you more.

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    • Guys that say no to what?

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What Guys Said 32

  • Most women assume you're being childish and selfish if all you do is chase tail trying to get laid.

    It's not necessarily a bad thing if you have a sorted past full of girlfriends... this just proves that women love you.

    But if you can't commit to just one girl that tends to be a huge Red Flag for many women.

    I'm a "relationship" guy too, and I learned that it doesn't pay to settle and if it takes hundreds of dates to find that PERFECT girl, then it's worth the risk scaring away a few random girls who don't get it.

    ~ Robby

    My Blog ( link )

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  • As long as you don't get to be too much of a man-whore, and 'play the field' generally more women will be drawn to you. Like some have said already, if a girl notices other girls have been with you, especially if they are popular/attractive girls, that proves you are worth something to women and you have their approval, which will raise your social value. Don't let any girls tell you different, a guy who has been with several women is more attractive than a virgin or some guy who has had few relationships (for the most part). That is why there are players, the more girls a guy hooks up with the easier it becomes. It's part because of his personality/charm/social skills and the other part is girls seeing other girls after him.

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    • Thanks, awesome and detailed explanation. I'm a shy guy and I totally lack experience, so I guess I'm a "loser" in the dating world, I get that. It's just a shame that I have to put on an act, or sleep around. I naturally want women to desire me, but it's a shame that I have to chase p*ssy up and down the block to achieve that

    • Like I said, you don't have to be man-whore, I was just trying to say that once you have dated a few girls and they at least liked you enough to date you for a bit, other girls will get wind of it and know that you have something to offer. I didn't mean you have to sleep around, as long as girls see you socializing with other girls that should help your social status.

  • That's just ridiculous, plain and simple, of course it doesn't and most girls are looking for guys who don't just want to hook up. I could do ballet dancing in a tight spandex body suit with a penis pattern on it and nobody could ever convince me that I'm not masculine,

    Seriously, look at what is masculine these days, shaved chests, manicured nails and make-up, they even have shaping clothes for guys now. Those are men? Or how about the gits who go out and get p*ssed up and passing out on the street after drooling over any poor unsuspecting girl to cross his path?

    Most of those guys can't even grow a beard, who are they to dictate what is masculine and what is not?

    Be yourself, and forget the rest.

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  • No, it just means he doesn't want a relationship, just no strings pleasure.

    Nothing wrong with that as long as you don't string girls along.

    It doesn't means you are more of a man... in fact some women would argue that it makes you "Less of a Man"... I'm not into judgement... if it makes you happy DO IT, when it STOPS making you happy, STOP DOING IT.

    When you are young you should experience all kinds of things...

    When you get older you will realize that none of that is important...

    Good luck.

    Joe

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  • No, but when guys are with friends it definitely seems more "masculine" to say that you've hooked up with a lot of hot girls. If you're in a relationship, some guys might give you sh*t but they'll more than likely be the ones who are mostly self-centered, insecure, and obviously not in a relationship.

    As Paul Rudd said in Role Models, "Do what makes you happy".

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    • A relationship would make me happy :) But all the girls overlook me.

    • With the utmost respect, you have to check yourself out. I haven't read any other comments in depth, but I skimmed through some of your comments to responses people made. What I mean is TRY to have confidence. It's easier said than done, but if you can muster up enough courage to ask out or even approach one girl, all of the others will be easier. The sooner you realize rejection is inevitable, the sooner you become more comfortable in your own skin and come into your own around women. Good luck

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