I Don't Like How Women are Held to Such High Standards.

I don't like it.

Men can stroll around looking like a pigsty. Shaggy, unkempt hair, 5-o'clock shadow, ripped jeans, beer-bellies, various bodily flaws, and generally an unhealthy appearance-- and yet, many seem to snag successful, healthy ladies.

Women must be the definition of perfection. They are wanted to show skin but to not look like a slut, big butt, big boobs, clear skin, perfect make-up, name brand clothing, no bodily flaws.

No particular experience birthed this rant.

And by no means am I implying that ALL guys, or ALL women are like that. It is a generalization. An unspoken expectation, in some cases.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Those standards are self imposed by women themselves. I also know that most women put such efforts into their looks mainly to compete against other women, because surely a guy will not reject one on the basis of "imperfect make-up." In fact most guys I know prefer a woman with natual beauty, the kind that hang out in jeans and a t shirt with messy hair that she didn't spend hours doing that day and still look good. It's the same concept as a man who can look scruff, messy hair and torn jeans; if a man can pull that off and look good, women are all about those "naturally good looks."

    I am actually more turned on by a girl who doesn't feel the need to have 3 hours worth of work put into her look just to step out of the house. To me it says she's super down to earth and confident while the contrary says the opposite. When a woman puts wayyy too much effort into her look every single day of her life, just to feel comfortable stepping outside the house, to me it just screams high maintenance and insecure. At least, experience has told me this is true, and has yet to fail me.

    btw...I could care less about name brand clothing. A woman that can make an outfit she got at a thrift store look good is like...WOW. In that case, it's not the clothes that make her look good, she makes the clothes look good! - so hot lol


What Guys Said 14

  • Its all how you look at it.

    I feel like its reversed.

    Most guys I know like a little fat in the thighs and ass, but the women _I_ know, none of them prefer 'a little bit of a gut'. I run into women online who say they do, I think the expecting every guy to have abs is more a big city thing.

    I think men can get away with more, appearance wise, but the ideal is also harder to hit.

    Men are also judged on a lot of things women aren't. Not too many women will get turned down for a second date because they don't own a car, or they don't earn enough.

  • Some of that is true. But that's society. It's not all guys fault the world is like this. Each gender, and type of person has something to be blamed at for this outcome.

    • Oh, yes, I am aware of that. I never said (nor intended) that it is the mens' fault.

  • Seriously? Anytime I walk around like that I get a lot of disapproving looks from girls.

    I prefer small boobs, I don't like make-up, and I certainly don't care about girls who care about brands.

    It's really women who put the standard so high for their own gender. You gals severely overestimate what the average guy's standard is.

  • I prefer smart witty girls who don't put on make up and are comfortable wearing sweat pants and a t-shirt. And I know there are many of us out there.

    I'm not saying that our society doesn't push women to feel like they should always look perfect and wear hills, so you're right to be upset about it. But you should just say f*** them all, and do what feels good to you!

  • unfortunately that's just the way it is.

    I know I try to look nice, it would be unfair to the girl if I looked like a pig and she was all dolled up.

    And I think we can both agree women are way better looking than men. Women are also objectified, I blame the media

  • it's easier to be visually, physically appealing to someone than it is to attract people with your status, social-skills, conversation skills, confidence, attitude, mentality, etc.

  • Somewhat true. I personally don't want a prefect looking girl. I would feel inadequate. I prefer more natural looking girls. I don't want a perfect girl. I'm nowhere near perfect. Lots of men want that though. Just like women want a tall handsome guy. It's just the way things are

  • we guys are held up to high-standards too, we have to be high-status, be a leader instead of a follower, be confident, have a independent attitude, mindset, be extremely comfortable and content with ourselves, have a "I don't care" type attitude, have a big, huge sense of humor, be very social, loud, talkative, outgoing, have a lot of friends, deep social-connections, have a life, have a passion, have goals, a mission and purpose in life, be interesting, have great or perfect-social skills, conversation-skills, comes down to the words and sentences that come out of our mouth, the right attitude, the right mindset, the right mentality, right way of thinking, walk right, stand right, sit right, breathe right, talk right, dress right. Also, I would say girls judge guys for their height the same way guys judge girls for their weight, that is not easy because your weight is something you can change, your height is not.

  • Newsflash: you hold yourself up to this standard most guys couldn't care less. we simply imagine them naked.

    • Ah, alright, I will believe that when I see it. Men are much more visual creatures-- saying that appearance doesn't matter is bull. Perhaps it is not the single thought on every man's mind, but it is very prominent.

      And I do not hold myself up to that standard, thank you. I take care of myself, though. It just pains me to witness other women take such extremes.

      Also, have never once said that it was men solely forcing this ideal.

  • I completely disagree. On my college campus, and there are about 29,000.. big school, the guys that get girls have to be dressing nice and be muscular and good at some sport. The hot sorority girls go to class in sweatshirts and short shorts with their hair back and no one cares, guys still wanna stick it in them.

    Sure they dress up for parties, but then so do the guys as well.

    In fact, I cannot think of any situation where what you say holds true. At work everyone has a dress code, in high school guys were expected to wear a certain style if they wanted a certain circle of friends. The only place I can see this being true is on TV sitcoms or in married life and even then the guy isn't trying to "snag" a beautiful lady.

    I think you watch too much tv.

  • Guys are held to high standards in other areas, but if you are just talking about looks, I'll let it go and I see your point. It's not as exaggerated as you put it, of course.I'm not sure how much of that is caused by men, though. A few of the things on your list, I couldn't care less about. I think women don't give men enough credit either. There are plenty of girls that don't fit your definition of "perfection" and they're getting guys just fine.

  • May be it's because guys offer so much more than their looks. We need to do it all remember?

    Be nice, have a good personality, work all day, make money, pay for everything, plan the outings, be fun and make you laugh, be interesting, be mysterious, make you feel safe yet excited, think about pleasing you and reading your mind so you don't get upset, buy you gifts, text you, call you, be a gentleman, be a sex god sometimes, be a gentle lovers other times etc etc etc

    Most women wouldn't last a day as men.

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    • Please... Get real

    • Lol at down arrows without any comment. It's easier to criticize than to articulate arguments, isn't it girls?

  • Another pathetic rant at how "unreasonable" are standards for women!

    If you won't take care of yourself, and worse - if you'll rant like this in person - don't expect anyone to like you!

    Guess what - guys also have to follow standards which ain't any less difficult to obtain to be attractive to girls! Your post is full of ignorance, stereotypes and generalizations!

    You can rant how much do you want to but nothing of that will ever affect the preferences of other people!

    • I think you missed the point. Never did I say that women should be accepted to let themselves go. Never. But I certainly do not see many men being driven to go under the knife to alter things that should not be changed (and possibly risk their health because of it.)

    • You didn't say it directly but your post is directed to it - a complaint about the pretty/hot girl archetype which guys find attractive!

      No, guys ain't required to go under the knife but they're required to lift weights like mofos, try it for curiosity, if you think it's any easier!

      And personality-wise.. damn, you're a perfect example how women are allowed to be bitchy, annoying and irresponsible (mostly)without receiving judgement, but the guy always must be calm and down-to-earth

    • Yes - though there are fat and unkempt drunkies who demand a model but I say screw them!

      Just because they are like that doesn't mean it's acceptable for guys to be like that - unlike of what you've said!

      And standards for women are not too high just because you think so!

      About you I sense a will to rationalize your own lack of self-image care and it's inconsistency with the preference of guys!

      Any girl who rants like you do better by starting to improve themselves instead of ranting online!

What Girls Said 5

  • A lot of value and importance is placed on the way a woman looks, more so than men, I'd agree with that. This is one of the double standards we face because of centuries of equating a woman's worth with how she looks, and also because of how women are sexualized in the media, and life in general. Men have their own double standards that are unfair to them of course, but you asked about this specific phenomenon.

    I don't think most guys require perfection, but certainly women place less value on their partner's looks than men do. Then again, there are things we judge men about that aren't any less shallow than looks. To argue about who's got it worse it pretty pointless imo.

    • I understand and agree.

  • What the hell are you talking about?

  • Well we live in a patriarchal society there will always be a double standard for years before the sexual revolution ...we where suppose to look like really good trophies. Now with the woman's movement we are pretty much suppose to be able do everything!

  • Im not sure what you are talking about, but when I look good, I feel good :-)

    • Of course. I am not putting that down.

  • This is life.

    Guys are gonna whine that women want all of these things from men, but it's not true. The men saying this only want the top tier women (lookswise) without offering anything but "niceness" to match. Double standards are real, but you can't dwell on it. Find a guy who works at being appealing ... they're out there.

    • A lot of women do.

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    • No, beauty is big but not 90%. There are plenty of pretty women out there, but if she can't hold her own then her looks want mean that much. If your point is true, then why are there so many pretty single women?

    • Are there?