Don't understand what is wrong with me?

So I have dated a few girls, but still have never had a girlfriend nor sex. The only thing I realized was that I needed to change the way I dress which still is kind of whack. So I am trying to change, most of the time now you might see me in a polo shirt and some jeans. Once in a while I will either pull out a button up or a regular t-shirt (I am chubby so I try to steer clear of certain things. Yet I am never sure what to wear, because of being chubby). That is besides the point right now, because I go to the gym (even though it is taking real long to lose this weight.), I am also changing over my clothes. My thing is I have either heard if you like a girl to keep chasing her (be persistent), but on the flip side I hear don't come off to strong and make yourself scarce so she misses you. The thing is I want the girl know that I like her so for me it still doesn't make much sense to me the whole don't act like you like her (or making yourself scarce). The only thing that I can think of as writing this is that I might come put myself out there and come off as desperate. My thing is if a girl doesn't respond to me after I text/call and wait a little bit I will try again a couple days later. Then if that doesn't work then just let it go (due to this I have been told by a few people that I give up to easily). I just don't know what exactly I am doing wrong that is chasing girls away. I try to mix things up, but still end up single. Right now it sucks to be single, because when you see other people with someone and others always making it seem like being single is like the Bubonic plague it does get you a little down and I guess desperate so to speak.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Be sweet, comfortable with yourself and not defensive or self loathing.. be available to her but not overly and too eager.. like do things like a good morning text with a smiley face.. and give her a 5 min good night phone call (once you've started to date a girl.. you need to lead into these so that she gets a chance to want this from you). Do you have a good group of friends? A girl wants a guy that she knows is OK with out her and doesn't need her.. but has a life already that she's becoming part of.. ask her advice about what one of your friends should do about a girl who doesn't treat him right.. things like that that say I care about your opinion, am inviting you to know what's going on with my friends and life and that you're moral..


What Girls Said 3

  • Your problem is not the way you dress or anything about could wear cargo pants that barely touch yur ankles and a purple belly shirt or true religion jeans and a blue T that matches bright blue eyes, but if the guy in the urkle cargos is confident and happy with himself his swagger is gonna send off a radar signal to girls, and if the jeans guy has low selfesteem and is uncomfortable with himself he may as well be dressed as the negative end of a magnet and all the girls dressed as the positive end. (maybe I'm exaggerating just a tad but you get the picture right? :)

  • you say you are chubby, fix that... huge turn off, well for a lot of women and you want to appeal to a wide range right? So work on that first.


What Guys Said 1

  • I can give you some advice with pictures. Give an update with your usual everyday clothes and style.