Why do guys says they're in love but are eager to quit so fast after an argument??

why not fight for your love? I don't get it. most guys say oh I can't live without ya etc...but than when the girl threatens their relationship or anything that gets you mad you so eager to quit.

girls would fight because we love hard and we mean it when we say I love you.


Most Helpful Guy

  • A weakness from those guys who cannot handle a conflict.

    Face it, take it and eat it. To having a strong relationship, there must also be conflicts sometimes, and how it affects the relation is all about how both are handling the problem.

    As someone said, "Dont fight for your Love, Fight with your Love".

    I agree with the asker, I find this pretty common, actaully more common for guys than girls. Maybe its becuase there are many guys who are scared of exposing themselves too much emotionally, or either getting too p*ssed off cause they cannot handle the conflict with the girl. So then its much easier to run.

    • I believe that was ARTIST BOY :-)

      Pretty decent quote... I presume if you can get that gong - you're good to go.

    • Oops, I think that was Gintrovet..... Sorry Gintrovert - Great Quote tho. :-)

      ( Just sounded like something Artist Boy has said.)

    • Haha! ARTIST BOY hasn't even answered, but maybe you've something else in mind about him =p Lol

      Gintrovet it is, he said that=)

What Guys Said 8

  • My ex is the same way, usually it's because after she finished yelling at me for a hour or so though.

    I ask her to stop calling me ugly and pathetic, she yells how she can't do that and to never talk to her again.

    She thinks I was drunk one time because what she heard from a friend of mine, asked me and said she'd believe me and value the truth most. I said I didn't drink, of course she thouht she already found me out and goes on how she can't stand liars and to never talk to her again.

    I ask her to quit calling other guys late at night so she could "fall asleep with someone", guess what she said.

    I'd text her and she give me a smiley as a response or a one word answer for a few weeks while on vacation. She then talks about how she waited for me and how I abandoned her, and guess what, never wants to talk again.

  • For me, if you (as a girl) threaten the relationship, then I want no part in this argument. The sole existence of that argument is then shifted from the issue at hand to me begging to be with you, and that is not what I signed up for. Many guys think, "I signed up for equal footing in a relationship, so why should I have to piece back the shambles after you blow it up?"

  • To fight FOR the one you love is TOTALLY different than fighting WITH the one you "love."

    There are healthy arguments in relationships, and that's perfectly ok... But to fight and be mad at each other regularly to the point of almost breaking up, that's not love or what I'd even call a healthy relationship.

    Fighting for the one you love is never giving up and following your dreams to be with the person you adore. Constantly being there for them, showing them that you care. Trying to win them over...

  • This would have to depend on the argument. There will always be arguments, no doubt about it. What happens in the arguments would determine the outcome.

    I have noticed that a lot of arguments are not about "What can we do to fix the situation" but "Whose fault is it". I don't care whose fault it is, that doesn't fix the problem. Placing blame is not about resolving issues, but "winning" the argument. Fine, it's my fault, you win, I lose. Don't expect me to stick around for the next argument, though.

    Why is there a problem? For example, I don't like to shower at night because I usually wake up sweaty. My girlfriend would HATE for me to go to bed without showering. If she hadn't told me that, I wouldn't know about it. Talk to each other. What is the problem, why is it a problem, and what do you think should be done to resolve it? The problem isn't going to mysteriously fix itself.

    Don't argue when you're mad. Just leave each other alone for a while, then get back to the issue when you're calm. Angry feelings do not make for logical, rational solutions.

    Unless the issue is that you're not getting enough action, sex isn't going to resolve the issue. Address the problem, don't just cover it up or expect it to go away. Makeup sex is for AFTER you're finished solving the problem, not as a replacement for it.

    Work together. If I ask you what you want me to do about the problem, don't tell me "fix it". If I don't have a problem with it, my solution is to not change a thing. Work together to find a solution that works for both of you.

    If a girl is willing to work towards a solution, then I'd be happy to stay with her. If a girl is willing to blame me for everything and decide that I'm the bad guy in the relationship, then I'll just go back to being single where there is no good guy/bad guy. Simple as that.

  • Whoever said "fight for your love" didn't mean "fight with your love repeatedly and about things of absolutely no consequence".

    When a "girl threatens the relationship" it just tells the guy that the ice is and always was thin and that he should find a new place to park his car lest he lose more than his confidence in you which he already has.

    • I agree with this. If you are on the verge of a fight. Take a minute and a deep breath. And decide if the fight is worth it. It usually isn't. You should never threaten the relationship just to get your point across, that's a blatant disrespect for your relationship.

  • Because girls like you are psychotic. You fight for your love, not WITH your love.

    • Awesome comment!!!!

      - Tho everyone knows that guys are psychotic equal to girls in frequency & number - at least you can not prove that the opposite is not the case^

      BTW - HOW do you fight with LOVE... I have a vague idea, but I am curious, you should ask people, what they think the difference is, - with a post?


    • Thanks.

      Nothing about what I said was sexist, so there is no need for that "guy are psychotic equal to girls".

      "HOW do you fight with LOVE" - "love" is another name some people use for "partner". So when I say "not WITH your love", it can be restated as "not WITH the one you love".

  • Well why do you always have to create drama?

    It's as if when everything is going well in a relationship, women just have to find a reason to start drama. The guy is expected to argue and fight over senseless things...

    This is psycho behavior. Your finding ways to make things difficult. You can't allow him to be happy, no, he has to fight for love like its the seventeen-hundreds.

    Unbelievable that you would get angry at him for wanting a sane environment. Maybe YOUR the problem. Maybe YOU need to see a therapist. Maybe YOU have issues


What Girls Said 5

  • usually when the guy says he wants to quit, he's just bluffing. he just has to cool off from the fight, and then he'll realize he can't live without you either. my boyfriend does this a lot, I consider him a drama queen because of it. I mean, if we just do things my way and discuss is rationally it will be over in 10 minutes, then we can have sex. but he'd rather start yelling and getting mad about everything then storming out and ignoring me for days, turning it into a huge deal, and saying he doesn't know if he even wants to be in this relationship anymore, but he always comes running back saying 'i can't live with out you, I love you, I'm sorry'. men are so dramatic!

    • Drama. Quuuuueeeeeeeeennn.

      Seen lots of them... Maybe it's the 'Crown' ^^


  • Sorry I can't really give an answer to that one.I am in the same boat. My guy doesn't fight with me.I get angry,hurt,whatever,wanna talk about it,he shuts down.He has no problems with knocking down every wall that gets in his way with work,school,family..anything but US. I don't understand men.

  • iv dated or been interested in guys who ran away from any conflict what so ever. any ounce of tension or discomfort and he is ready to run for the door. in the past it made be feel insecure and I tried to be someone I was not. it gave me some experience and I do know how to control my emotions better. but now iv actually made an sport out of weeding those guys who just can't handle me at my worst. I'm not a simple girl. the best guy I ever dated accepted me for my flaws and was so calm with me when I would "bug out" about something.

  • I hate when a guy do it to me.

  • Seems like its the opposite to me. Guys seem to stay with girls that fight like hell with them. I don't get it. Why don't they want less drama?