I was wondering if Myspace, Facebook and that are good places to meet and date girls as I'm really shy and nervous around them and even just around... Show More
Most Helpful Guy
Yeah, if you wanna meet barely legal trash 8 out of 10 times.
Why don't you go to a party and have some friends introduce you to some girls? Or go to places that people share hobbies with you, it doesn't have to be a bar.
You really need to get over being shy instead of trying to find a way around it. If you are not confident then girls will never be interested. The only way to get over it is to get out there and make a goal to get turned down 30 or 40 times. Then you won't be expecting anything. And when you do make a connection its like a bonus. Think of it as an assignment that you have to do for school or something and detach yourself a little bit. You can't tell yourself that every girl you approach has to say yes just to cater to your pride. (also don't approach every girl in the bar right in a row, be tactful and not desperate) Just brush it off if you get rejected and try to learn something each time to perfect your approach. I was rejected probably hundreds of times when I was single but I expected it and its how I learned. I also met tons of great girls. And even after dating things don't always work out for long. Unless you are a celebrity or a model or something, you will get turned down more often than not. Its just how it is. You have to learn to accept it.
After a while I stopped caring at all. If someone is going to dismiss you right away or even after a bit of talking, so what? You just learned that person wasn't right for you. With thousands of girls within your everyday interactions, odds are most of them are not a match. Its just math.
Once you get good at initiating a conversation its easy. The best way to start is to get the person to talk about themselves. Most people jump at that chance and you get to look like you are talking but you are really just sitting there listening and learning about the person. Then you have material to relate to. You have SOMETHING in common with everyone you talk to no matter how small. Just learn how to figure it out quickly.
And find a buddy or two to go out with that are more confident than you are now and watch them as well. Watch how other guys in the bar talk to girls. You'll figure out what works for you. And remember to always at least act like you are having a good time. If you are laughing and having fun, (or better yet the one making other people laugh and have fun) you gain credit with the girls as someone that is liked. If you just stand around and be shy or look worried, etc. Then you may as well be a bar stool. They will look right past you. So go out and talk to 10 girls this weekend regardless of what happens. And you don't have to pick them up just be fun and at least try to have fun with your friends and see what happens.