Guys looking for a soul mate?

I have been with three guys, all of them broke my heart and when it came to explaining why they decided its time to end things they give me the same speech. They tell me they know I will find someone and that I'm a great girl. OK, I don’t mind that… its something normal to say to not hurt the person during a breakup. After a couple of months or years, we contact again and they all say the same thing: “I don’t want anything serious, I’m looking for the one…” they talk about finding a soul mate and they tell me that one day I will see a guy and in the moment I will see him I will know He is the One…

Personally I think they live in a fairy tale, I'm more down to earth. I don’t think I can see some random guy and “know” he is the future father of my kids. I'm not sure about the soul mate thing, I think it’s a myth. I think that you find your "soul mate" when you realize that the person next to you is making an effort in the relationship… I think that guys need to appreciate what they have and stop dreaming…

What do you think? Do you believe that one day you will see someone and instantly “know” they are the One?

Do you think most of the guys ask for too much and it’s never enough for them?

I been a really nice girl to all the guys I dated, but they are never satisfied…


Most Helpful Girl

  • I don't really believe in 'soul mates', espeacially there part where there is only one. But I have met a few guys that as soon as I meet them we instantly click and I get really good vibes from them, however I wouldn't say that makes them my 'soul mate'.

    As for these guys you were dating, I don't know how long you were with them... but I think in all relationships there comes a point where you've been together a couple years and its time that you either takes things to the next level and get engaged or you go your separate ways. So probably these guys just weren't ready to commit to anyone and they just told you this 'soul mate' stuff as an excuse to end it.


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What Guys Said 3

  • I think that you should listen to them.

  • I don't exactly believe in a soul mate but I do believe that everyone has someone out there for them. More than one person fits this though. Some people have more people whom they are compatible with than others. As to the whole "knowing" someone is the one. No, time will tell if they are the one. But you can't just see someone and automatically know they are the one person you are compatible with. You can see someone and know they are the "one" you want to have sex with. In other words you see them and just get so turned on by the way you see them act and the way they look that you get an urge to want to f*** them. Not saying you would or anything because we are human. We have that ID that makes us want to f*** that person, and we have the superego to control that behavior. You will find a guy eventually. It might take you til you are in your 30's or even 40's. Hopefully not but its possible. Just don't rush things you are young. Also remember your age, and think of what guys want at your age compared to women. Women around your age probably a few years older but your age as well is possible. To settle down and start a family, Men won't want that till late 20's and early 30's when they are financially ready for a family to support. While men in early 20's wanna live life and have fun, go out and what not. Women do too, but more or less start a family is higher on the list..This is generalizing and each individual is different, but on average this is how it goes.

    Guys do need to realize what they have and stop dreaming but so do women. Maybe your an exception, but a lot of women want that fairy tale prince, and the very second they find a flaw they will find another guy to satisfy that need if this guy cant. Whether its emotional support, or even sex. I'm not saying you should settle for one man, but if you don't love your mans flaws then you shouldn't be with him. Simple as that, but the women who stay with there man, maybe because he can put a roof over their head and have them live comfortably, will end up cheating, because they decide to stick with a guy whos flaws they don't like. Which usually is in the sack. I'm not gonna get on the topic of cheating more than I already have, but both genders do need to realize what they have, and learn to appreciate each other more, and this will make someone go from "ehh" about the flaws to. I love their flaws. It is good to see that you are one of those girls who, from what it sounds like because I don't know you, do realize you have found a good guy, but only to find out later that he doesn't realize he found the right girl and everything goes away.

  • I never believed to much in a soul-mate, or rather never put a lot of thought into it. A year ago, I met this girl and something about her just made me say "wow". Dated her for a year, and it was great and everything was perfect. Yes...I fell for her more and more each day, and I can honestly say she is the most beautiful girl in the world to me, and she is my soul-mate...she broke up with me 4 months ago for an ex. It might seem like we will never get back together, as she seems pretty serious with him. But...I can't help thinking about her, dreaming about her. I don't look at other women like I use to; she is the only one that I want. You may find your soul-mate, but they may not find you...sad but true.


What Girls Said 1

  • maybe they don't know what they want in their life yet and it has nothing to do with you.

    I have rejected a ton of guys before and it wasn't that they were mean to me. It was just that I wasn't ready for a relationship and to truly fall in love with anyone.