My friend and I were having a discussion. She told me 'I don't think you can get married' and she paused and then said 'like me, I never think about it, I try to be independent'-that sort of stuff.
She realizes that emotionally I can't even talk to a guy right now, since all of my past few relationships have not been successful, the guys I've been with didn't treat me well, so overall, I have a negative outlook in terms of relationships with guys beyond friends.
I don't know if anyone understands what I'm talking about. I am meaning to say I am a little depressed about the situation and I do distract myself a lot (lol) with school, work and extracurricular, but unlike her, I do want to get married someday. It just seems hopeless when all the relationships have ended badly for me, leaving me emotional wrecked at times; I wonder, is there a way to think about the matter so that I don't feel depressed.
She says I'm skinny and every time we go out, guys look in my direction and she says it's a 'curse'. I'm not overly attractive nor am I unpleasantly unappealing. Just right now, it feels like these two guys I've gone out with, have ruined my mind-set, -does anyone have advice as to how you would maybe think more positively? I seem to be in a rut lately especially after she said this to me.
But I'm not sure if I'm even depressed because when I was younger I didn't want to get married because I thought it was stupid because women have to do so much work and then you always have to keep an eye on the husband etc etc, and then I wanted to because I would love to be loved in that way (and I think it's human nature to want to be loved) and then now (after I've had bad experiences with my past relationships) I hate guys that even resemble my ex's. Idk. I would love to hear from people who are kinda in the same situation and can relate to what I'm talking about. How do you have 'hope'? Thanks ^-^
note* also, I do not think she meant that I was not attractive but meant to say I'm not 'emotionally stable' in terms of relationships. How do you have 'hope' in getting over this feeling, because it feels like the next guy will do the same, will treat me badly, and go out with other girls behind my back, and say he lets me go etc. I mean, the past affects the future, right?
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I think your friend means well, just hard a hard time trying to explain herself. And really, it sounds like, well, you know how you can expect something, and want it a lot, and you end up pushing it away, or prolonging whatever it is. It's like putting so much pressure on something that it's hard for it to naturally happen. That's what I think she meant.1