I am an average looking (or so it seems) 23 year old girl. I have my share of problems- I suffer from anxiety and a bit of depression and hate going out.
I have difficulty making friends and really don't have any acquaintances in college. Never had a real boyfriend and am a virgin. Day in and day out, I go through the same boring old routine- wake up, get ready, catch the 8 am train, walk about half a mile to school, take class, and come back home again.
Nothing ever happens during school or in the process. I sometimes frequent the coffee shop, in hopes that I will catch the look of a cute guy, but nothing like that has ever occurred (maybe that only happens in movies and books?). No guys approach me or blatantly hit on me (the only time a guy has hit on me this year said I have a pretty face, but it probably was out of pity for the lonely looking, sad girl), no girl strikes up a conversation with me.
I am at a loss.
I feel like I will never ever meet anybody at this rate. I understand the phrase "my loneliness is killing me" more clearly now.
My life is so freaking boring. It's embarrassing how I must resort to spending time with my mother during the weekends because I have no friends. People my age are out with their own peers, while I am the odd one hanging out with her mom.
I feel like somehow I have my appearance to blame for this pitiful life. I know I'm not ugly, but I'm not really labelled as the pretty girl. I just happen to be a bookish-nerdy looking average nice girl.
Odd this is, I used to be significantly more attractive 2 years ago, or so it seemed. People in class would approach me and guys would show interest in me. Now, nobody strikes up any form of convo with me and guys rarely if ever approach. The only thing that has changed from then and now is how more depressed I've gotten (thankfully, I'm taking meds) and how I found my first strand of white hair last week. I am getting uglier and older.
I know this is a long rant, and most of you probably won't read all of this junk, but hopefully, somebody out here can relate to some of my feelings and have any suggestions to make?
Most Helpful Guy
Don't put yourself down, find yourself. Have you ever heard of the placebo affect? happy energy draws people in, emrace yourself, do what you enjoy and makes you happy without caring what others think. You are you and not everyone will love you but the ones that like you will respect you for who you are.
Seriously, just find things that interest you and make you feel good. Don't worry about the small things now, having a boyfriend may not be the best thing for you right now. Acheive a much as you can now and don't worry about this now. All of Gods children are beautiful, don't think different :P5