Talked to the girlfriends parents about marriage, they seem happy but should I be concerned with what they said?

I'm 29 and madly in love with a girl who is 26. We spend nearly everyday together. She works nights and will often come over in the morning before I go to work or I will go to her. She has been talking long term very early on in the relationship. Kids, living together, marriage, etc. I'm completely on the same page. I went and bought a ring. Then I asked her parents. Lots of emotion out of her parents and myself they said I have their blessing.

However two things stood out. First, her mom said I should wait until August because it would make my girlfriend more comfortable. That is apparently what my girlfriend said when she talked to her mom about the possibility of marriage. It's just under 1 year together and I don't see a big difference asking in June vs asking in August. It also gives me the impression that my girlfriend has doubts, despite all of the grandiose talks if the future. Second, her parents also commented that she often gets bored by the second year of her relationships. Odd thing to bring up given the situation. Should I be concerned? Should I wait until August or go with my initial plan for June?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Just because you propose doesn't mean you get married right there and then. Propose when you want to but don't get married right away. Give it some time and really get to know her. You haven't even been together for a yeR yet. Don't rush I to marriage until all your doubts are gone

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What Girls Said 3

  • Yes wait it out

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  • Why would you propose to someone you haven't even known a year anyways?

    Seems WAY too soon to me.

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    • Eh my parents were engaged 6 months into their relationship. Still together 32 years later. I lived with a girl I was engaged to previously for 3 years and that ended poorly. You think you know some one and it turns out to be a farce. If three years in the same living quarters wasn't enough, what is?

    • Well if you want to take that kind of gamble go ahead but after hearing what her parents said I would tread lightly.

  • Girls are funny creatures...we like to block things out in time in a lot of areas in our life. It somehow makes us feel secure. June isn't far from August, so just wait it out. Meanwhile plan an awesome proposal! :)

    I think her parents are just giving you a warning about their daughter's tendiacies in a relationship and I would pay attention to that. Have a long engagement that way you can fully see how things play out. Better safe then sorry...

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What Guys Said 5

  • Talking about mairrage and kids early on in a relationship is not a good thing, in fact it is all too often a sign of insecurity and unstability on both of your parts. Trust me it's something that I learned the hard way. Her parents are probably referring to other failed relationships of hers that she got too serious to fast in when they say she "gets bored" I can see that they are just hoping you two will give things more time before just jumping into things. Mairrage is a big deal and not something to just jump right on into. it's not a race, real love is about taking time and looking at things realistically and really getting to know each other. I can already see that both of you are not thinking rationally about this. I have been there and done this so I am telling you from experience, give it more time and speak your mind about things that may bother you, trust me the issues are there even though you think they might not be and just don't want to see them. Give it time, you will be glad you did.

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  • Her parents loved her first, so you should honor their request.

    As for the "second year" comment, here are my thoughts. The emotional/romantic connection will come and go over the course of time. It seems that a lot of people today think that this will last forever, but it just doesn't. How long have her previous relationships lasted? Did she talk about the future in such ways with them? Might be something else to consider.

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    • Her last serious relationship involved her living with her ex and discussing a future together. That was about 2 years and it ended up with the ex being a serial cheater. Who knows.

  • I agree 100% with the anon guy. They're telling you very good information. It doesn't sound like this is going to work out well for you, but you never know.

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  • Those are huge red flags. You need a new girl.

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  • You would have to be a prize idiot to ignore the very good sense of the girls parents. They know her much better than you do.

    No matter how madly you are in love with this girl, her parents know her best. If they say it's better to wait, then it's better to wait.

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