Obssesed with getting the ring (getting a proposal from my boyfriend). Can't stop thinking about it.

I am a 28 year old female. My bf is 34 and has been married before. I just had his first child. A baby girl 5 months old and i have a 6 year old from previous relationship. Me and him have been together for a year and 3 months now. We live together in our own house. He does so much for our family and takes care of the kids so well. We both work full time. When we first got together he assured me i would be his wife and when he got the money the ring was mine. Well since then we have fell into a bunch of arguments about different things. no relationship is perfect. We have never cheated on each other nor do i have a reason to believe he has. I asked him about 3 months ago about marriage and he says he not ready yet! Big change from what was said before. He calls me his fiance to others but haven't proposed. I know we haven't been together long but our relationship is like weve been together forever. He says he wants to spend his life with me but is not ready for marriage yet. Im obsessing over this and dont wanna mess up what we have because of my impatience! All of my friends are ENGAGED or married. Am i waiting for nothing? Or do i need to chill? Of course u guys dont know him or me but i just need to know if i am tripping or is he giving me these mixed messages?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Honestly if he said it then he likely means it especially since you've been together so long. Likely he is gonna surprise you with it on a birthday or something. The more you ask about it the more it's gonna stir things up. He more than likely wants it to slap you in the face though and he is probably waiting for an opportunity to do it when your finances are all straight and he has plenty of free time to plan things out and make the wedding the best that he possibly can.

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What Guys Said 3

  • Getting married will mess up what you have, if what you have is so great then be happy and enjoy life instead of looking for some artificial bullshit to screw things up. Think about it, you already have every thing that matters yet your determined to do something that will change it and don't be fooled getting married will change things.

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    • I feel that that is somewhat true but i would like the status of being a wife. Im not sure if it will mess things up or not but i find it a great gift for a man give the woman he loves his last name. Ee can go on as if we were married but i would love his last name to make us a unit and be blessed by God

    • You don't have to marry to change your name.

      So status is more important than what you have because it's worth risking what you have for the status of telling your friends, or who ever, your married? So is this just an irrational choice your hoping will work out for the best?

      I find this confusing...

    • No its not more important than what i have. Its not for showing off to friends. Its for me. But i def understand what u are saying. I love tge idea of having a ring on my finger. Be it a band or diamond does not matter to me.

  • ... How do you RUSH wanting to spend the rest of your life with someone? You literally have the REST of your life to make that decision. That makes no sense. You're already sharing in their life.

    People who are impatient to get married make no sense to me.

    "I can't WAIT to spend the rest of my life with you!"

    Like... what?

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  • i hope your boyfriend finds MGTOW before its too late...

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What Girls Said 3

  • He's been married before so he's probably interested in taking it slower this time or maybe he has no hope of getting married again because the first time was too difficult for him. You need to talk to him about he's feeling and how you're hoping to get married one day. He may not want to get married ever again so you need to be aware of this and decide what to do. If he calls you wifey, it's clear he loves you and sees you as someone who will be in his life until the day he dies but you can be with someone for life without marriage. The key to every problem in a relationship is communication so communicate with him!

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  • Sounds like you're on a better track than Nicole and John Cena. He basically told her he was never making that mistake again. And I dont think he would ever call her fiance or anything. I think you should just relax and wait for it. I assume he's hinting around to it since he keeps calling you wifey and all that. Im happy for yall, I just wish he'd hurry it up lol :)

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  • you've been together for a year and a half so there's really no need to rush. get to know each other very well first.

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