Is it wrong to tell your daughter to marry for money and not love?

My parents are in debt and their jobs don't pay much but they make the most of everything. I don't have a great paying job either but I'm not miserable about it. However myself and my mother were taking about the future and she told me never marry for love, marry for money. I know money pays the bills and it's needed for a lot of things but it doesn't impress me. I wasn't at all happy with what she said. Like I do want to be comfortable when I'm older so I can look after myself and take care of my future partner and family and hopefully vise versa but would you tell you daughter to do this?

Updates:
Some people are taking me up wrong. I don't agree with what my mother said.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • No it is not right at all! My mother says the same thing to me my grandmother too but I dont care a little bit about money if I love him. He can be the poorest people in the world but if I love him I will spend the rest of my life with him. Love is much more important for me then money, I think I live to love and get loved.

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What Guys Said 15

  • Your Question Have one tricky part. Which you have Mentioned Your Mother. Your Mother is Telling you Marry a Rich Guy,

    There are good looking, understanding nice rich guys, Your mother says Marry Good Man who is Rich and vise versa.
    If you can't find a good rich guy, that's okay you don't have to marry him. Like i saw Lebonan Afghanistan Pakistan, Iraan, Tajikestan , in these places they give their 12 year old daughter to an elderly person of age 65 or 40 and various onse more, just for money.

    These kind of marriages doesn't really go Well, but if you Marry a Good boy from a rich family than its another point.
    Money is Evil that can do anything, but can't do few things it can't by happiness, it can't buy comfort, and it can't buy love. and it Can't make a relationship a better Relation ship.
    but the rest it can buy you anything you want.
    if you don't eat at night and you sleep along with someone holding your hand telling you that he loves you more than anything you will be happy with him.

    but your mother is right in some cases, if she says like to marry 65 years old for marry than its not good to do.

    Your mother is just a bit frustrated with life. give her hand and a big hug and tell her that you love her so much. and everything will be Okay one day. and tell her the stories of people who are worst than you financially, and she will be Okay at that time.

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  • wow that is some very cold/harsh advice
    if you do take her advice don't complain that your husband doesn't love you, because you never loved him, you loved the money

    in this world we live in it seems money is the only reason people do anything, what happened to doing things that make you happy...

    i think it is wrong, she basically is saying that she married your father out of love and now she is unhappy, but really that unhappiness isn't his fault its hers, she isn't content with being financially unstable and feeling poor. poor dude i hope your father is ok...

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  • I think it's really wrong, yeah.

    Having some money and having resources to meet our needs matters. Of course it does. Marrying simply to acquire or assure those things, though? That sounds like a crappy way to live.

    At the risk of seeming presumptuous, it kinda sounds like your mom maybe married with the hope of finding love and creating financial stability, but she has neither of those things currently. Otherwise, why give that kind of advise.

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  • no I wouldn't lol.

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  • I would not. She sounds bitter.

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  • Yes, it's wrong and I wouldn't tell my daughter to do this. However, maybe your mother is just going through a hard time and didn't think very much when she told you this. So, just keep thinking the way you do.

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  • I would never tell any daughter I might have to do that. So yes, I think that's wrong.

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  • Marriage SHOULD be for love (but both parties being financially sound makes marriage way easier).

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  • Yes as it rears yet another spoiled bastard.

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  • OF COURSE IT'S WRONG! Tell your mom that you are NOT a gold-digger!

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  • Money talks... Yeah.. .

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  • No that's horrible. Unless its for jokes

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  • Its definitely not right! If u want to be happy go for love not money.

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  • Mothers like yours... the ultimate reason many younger people would never marry someone unless he or she has got more money than oneself

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  • She's wrong, but she means well so don't be too hard on her. She doesn't want you to struggle or go through the things she went through. But as they say, marrying for money is a hard way of making a living. It wouldn't make you happy.

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What Girls Said 16

  • Not wrong at all. Actually very intelligent and traditional. Love is the absolute easiest part of a marriage and it is easy to learn to do. It is also the most irrelevant.
    Marrying for love is very modern, our society has been doing so for under 100 years. It really hasn't caused anything but a lot of drama and high divorce rates.
    Before that parents and other family members were highly involved with choosing spouses for their children and marriage was made in order to gain land and power which equal money. A spouse was chosen by what he could provide for you. A man that had a steady job and was known for being an acceptable member of society gets you a lot farther in life than someone that can only offer you the words "I love you."
    People forget that marriage is above all a legal and financial decision. Things like love and commitment and all that ooey gooey emotional stuff is the basis of a relationship. You can have one without the others. In fact one should never make legal and financial decisions based upon emotions. That is where you get into trouble.

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  • Your mom just doesn't want you to have her same struggles which is understandable.

    She's giving you the wrong advice.

    What she should tell you is go to college.
    study a major that pays well, where you'd never be out of a job. Ex. Nurse, doctor, teacher etc.
    Don't depend on a man... because a man can leave.
    then what would u be left with?

    Be independent.
    Be better than them.
    Do not be a gold digger and depend on someone else's fortune.

    what happens if they lose it all?

    Make sure you have it together before you get in serious involvement with anyone else.

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  • I wouldn't. I'd rather struggle through life with someone I love than have it easy with someone I tolerate or only like as a friend.

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  • It's not really my buisness, I believe that people should do what they want or makes them happy. And unfortunately some people have to marry for money in certain colleges, I think it would be better to raise her to find a guy that she cares about but is also stable money wise but it's your desicion overall

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  • My mother tells me to do that, and no you should NOT marry because of money because just think down the road if you did? You' ll fall in love with someone while being with the guy with money and end up cheating, too much? Moral of the story marry for LOVE.

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  • I would never tell my daughter this!! You should marry for love, money shouldn't matter. Money actually doesn't impress me and I never liked it when guys flaunted it in my face. You should rather marry someone you love rather than marry someone with a lot more money. Marrying for money sounds lonely and like a terrible life.

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  • My mom suffered much when she was young, she says almost everyday now that we've grown up that she doesn't want us to suffer, she doesn't want us to wake up with a cock's sound like she did, but neverthless she never said to marry JUST for money, love is important

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  • wow lol! u should marry 4 love if at all. even tho both are important i'd rather have 2 work + with the love of my life than a rich dude who can support my financal needs only.

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  • Marrying for money is never right marrying for only money causes martial problems and divorce you marry for love your not supposed to look at age money or looks your suppose look deeper you look at personality caring love i fell in love with someone older than me he works part time his job dosent pay much but he gets me what he can and i love him

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  • My dad jokes about me marrying rich all the time. I don't take him seriously.

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  • Usually people that marry for money or looks or anything else superficial aren't happy.

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  • Yes, if encourage the opposite and tell her to make her own money

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    • When the guy leaves you and you run out of money how are you going to survive

  • If she wants you to be rich and depressed, then she is right.

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  • Not right.

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  • I'd never tell my daughter to get married. Period. Throwing her life away to subservience and motherhood, when she could be a career lady with a 6 figure salary, slim waistline and attractive boy toy. Nobody wants a fat couch husband, rich or poor. She can make her own money.

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  • Lol I wouldn't

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