Why do YOU (not) want to get married?

Why do YOU want to get married?

Why do YOU not want to get married?

Let the opinions flyyyyy... but keep it clean and real. No hate, no tears, no rage, no butthurts and most importantly: NO LIES! (However opinions may change after time but let's close the eyes about the changing future, what counts is right HERE and right NOW!)

GO! Hit the keyboard!

  • YES, I want to get married
    56% (9)56% (15)56% (24)Vote
  • NO, I do not want to get married
    44% (7)44% (12)44% (19)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
Please give reasons in the comments, not just if you want or not because that's why the poll is here :( Thank you!

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Don't care much for marriage. Before my parents got divorced (when I was little) family life was a chaotic abusive mess so if possible I do not ever want to go through that or put someone else through it.

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What Girls Said 13

  • Why do YOU not want to get married?
    For me:
    - Sex is sh*t for gals already when you add in marriage guys just get worse as they are way less inclined to put in effort because sex is now an expectation

    - Nagging for unwanted sex solely for his benefit while he bullsh*ts that coercing me to have undesired sex is how he shows his love

    - Most of the household duties are likely to be done by me with little to no recognition while any work done by him is exaggerated and expected to be praised (I'd be pretty resentful)

    - Most of the childcare duties are likely to be done by me with it being seen as a given while any work done by him is exaggerated and expected to be praised (again I'd be pretty resentful)

    - Male ego gets even higher than the standard over-inflated as he thinks he is some prize and I should be grateful he gave up sleeping with lots of gals for me (despite how it's more probable I would be more successful sleeping around)

    - High likelihood of getting cheated on

    - High likelihood of getting cheated on and the gal getting pregnant so I get a constant reminder of the guy's disrespect for me isn't appealing

    - High likelihood of me regretting being married (studies show many sometimes most gals regret getting married)

    - High likelihood I'll be more unhappy (studies show single gals are happier than married gals)

    - Likely I'll be upgraded as I find a guy's sense of commitment is 'I'll be with you until someone hotter comes and I can get them'. I find guys commitment hinges solely on the fallout ie most guys would up and divorce if there was less fallout.

    - Guys don't seem to do anything expect financially contribute and 'help' with the household/childcare. I quote help as seemingly that's what it's seen as instead of him doing his part.

    In my opinion it's quite telling of how sh*tty marriage seemingly is for gals when the end of it appears to be the only appealing part.

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  • I am married, and never knew what it meant when people said, "When you meet the one you'll know." I tried to find that truth with other men I had relationships with and dreaded marrying THEM but still wanted to get married some day. I'm glad they didn't work out. Marriage with my husband now has been the best thing that has happened for me, and I know it has for him too. We do have many benefits that don't just look good on paper, but are on paper nonetheless. Aside from being each other's partner and love of our lives, there are perks to being a married couple. We already had them as we lived together also, but actually making it legal helped us with other things we wanted to do with our future.

    However, before him, I always had this saying: I'd rather be unmarried and happy than married to the wrong man. It was me being negative about love back then. I just never considered that the right man would come along and marriage would feel right.

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  • i want to get married eventually. I think its really important for love and commitment to be shown, plus I was brought up pretty traditionally, so its always kind of been in my mind that I would get married.

    I think I mostly want to get married because when someone says I love you, it is just words, but if someone wants to marry you, they're saying they will love you forever and always, even if you get fat or old or ugly or sick they're always going to stay with you until "death do them part".

    I'm a total romantic though, so that's another reason. I feel like getting married (and staying happily married like those cute old people you see holding hands) is the ultimate happy ending, and I'm a sucker for the idea of happily ever after. Too many disney movies I guess :P

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    • I don't want to get married any time soon though!!! Like maybe in like 5-10 years. Too young to get married now, and you kind of need a bf before you can have a fiance so there's that :P

  • Ok I'll be real on why I DONT want to get married or settle... I don't believe in commitment I don't share the thought of only being with 1 person for the rest of your life when life is so short and amazing to share moments with different people and just enjoy... I don't want to settle also because I don't like dramas and to be honest I'm a professional I make decent money and can support myself so I have my own place and can come and go as I please without being worry about someone getting upset with me I like freedom

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  • I am not completely opposed to the idea of getting married, but at understanding my general outlook on life makes it very unlikely.

    The person I hypothetically would marry would need to be a truly exceptional individual who would cause dismal feelings if they weren't in my life permanently. That would be a practically once-in-a-lifetime chance for me, and therefore I do not see it happening. I would also need trust, comfort in presence, and total equality in the partnership with no set roles decided by gender.

    I value solitude and self-sufficiency, I do not see myself having children, and I am not a person who needs the acceptance of a crowd of others to thrive. Marriage is not something I need to be happy. I need to be happy in myself.

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    • Well said lady. Very well said.

  • Yes, I want to get married eventually.. Cause it's beautiful. I want to take his last surname. Waking up next to the person whom you love everyday... Would be so amazing. Have his kids, watch them grow. And growing old with that person. That's what I would like to call a great life.

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  • I have been married for a while now, and my husband and I have a good relationship. But if I were single at this point in life, I would NOT get married. If a woman is financially independent and doesn't have kids, there is no advantage for her to be married. Marriage usually involves a lot of work and many compromises. My unmarried friends travel more, do more spontaneous things, can spend all their money on themselves, and can move to the end of the world, if they want that. When you are married, you must take into consideration the other person's feelings and wishes, which often means you must settle for a certain routine. And yes, married men stop trying to seduce their wives, when they know that she will always be there. When I was dating before being married I was getting a lot more attention, such as flowers, compliments, surprises, and other gestures that made me feel wanted and attractive.

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  • I would like to get married because I just see it as respectful, I would like to be someones wife not girlfriend forever. I don't look down on anyone who doesn't want to be married but it's just how I feel about myself.

    I don't want some fairy tale, big, expensive wedding though, I want to elope, sign some papers and have fun with it lol. I don't need or want my family/friends there and I don't care about decorations or dresses.

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    • Down to earth, why the hell hasn't a guy put a ring on you? lol

    • Lol, i've had two try. I know i'm old but i'm just not quite ready yet lol, I got out of a bad relationship before my current boyfriend so I just want to take my time a little is all :)

    • Haha fair enough :)

  • *Monogamy is un-natural to me
    *I get bored of men very easily
    *I NEED continual variety in ALL aspects of my life.

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    • +
      *I TOTALLY value my 24/7/365 freedom
      *I am too selfish and independent to ever want to compromise
      *I HATE being told what to do

    • Show All
    • @ I don't know. (smiling) This is HARDLY new OR surprising and merely reflects opinions in my offline life also.

    • @ asker. (smile. laughing) ) MANY men RESENT women like myself purely because they can't do likewise as easily or nearly as often.

  • I'm not sure yet if I want to get married. My dad is a divorce lawyer and it's it's a lot of work if you ever want to get divorced. Also there's not really something to win in a marriage.
    On the other side, I love the symbol, gesture and my grandparents would be very happy (they're Christian). I also like the party, honeymoon etc. I'll decide when I'm older and when this subject comes to table.

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  • I'm on the verge of finishing a take about this very topic so keep an eye out for that! :)

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    • Please LET ME KNOW if you publish it :) ill be wait.

    • Just link your take here in your own opinion and I won't miss ;-)

    • Okay. It'll be promoted so you'll probably see it in the feed as well.

  • YES! I want to get married one day! :)

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  • I want to get married because I think that it's a great way to celebrate love. That's my only reason really. It's a special day with the man I love

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What Guys Said 17

  • I want to get married but I will be very cautious. There are too many stories of guys getting TOTALLY screwed by a bad marriage. I don't want to lose half my stuff, my kids, and my long time relationship. I know that it's only bad marriages that end like that, but look at the divorce rate. And then look at what bad things happen to the dude BECAUSE of the divorce.
    Scary stuff man. Scary stuff...

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    • Scary - thats too mild expressed D= but I know man :-/

  • I actually WANT to get married, but I seriously doubt if anyone would consider marrying me! :P

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    • And why exactly?

    • Because I'm highly insecure about myself, and I can't, for the life of me, muster up enough courage to approach women. Every time I think of asking someone out, I begin to feel that I'm setting myself up for rejection so i never go ahead. I'm stuck with the thought that because I'm a 'common' man who doesn't have anything 'special' compared to other men, women would never even consider me.

      So when I can't even date (due to the issues I mentioned), how on Earth can i get married? :P

  • I don't want to get married because I don't like being with someone EVERY night. I like spending a bit of time by myself from time to time.

    I also don't want to trigger the children conversation because I don't want them.

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  • I want to spend my life with a wonderful woman who will be my partner in crime lol. Always wanted a family and to be a father.

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  • Oh heck with the money and other things! I've been girl crazy since birth! I can't wait to get married. But I am waiting for Jesus to show me the right girl. God made marriage to be for life! That's why I'm going to keep my vows to my future wife! I'm going to beg God to teach me how to be a good husband! I can't just follow my heart because it can be easily deceived! I've got to lead my heart!

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  • Yeah I do want to get married. I don't look forward to the day of the wedding. Whomever you are future wife I apologize for my friends actions that day! haha

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  • Won't get married because ceremony a complete waste of money and for what a few photographs (YAWN)

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  • I would love to have a significant other that I could count on and know will be there with a smile when I get home...

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  • Why should I promise someone I'll be with them until one of us dies? It just seems like an arrogant and stupid thing to do.

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  • I don't want to get married for now, but it's not bad in and by itself. I'm simply not ready for it for myself at this time.

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  • We all may have to for things like insurance, but I just don't want someone ruining my life by taking my assets. Everyone knows that person who had their house taken by their wife.

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    • That also says a lot about the person who chose them as a partner, keep in mind. There is always a risk, for everyone involved, regardless of it being about marriage or not. I don't plan on marrying, but if I did, it would not done lightly and it would not be for something as trivial as assets.

  • Eventually I will... For the time being circumstances don't allow me... !

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  • Want but when reach my late 30 or early 40.

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  • because i dont want to always fish in the same fishole (pussy)

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  • I think it does help provide structure, focus and a sense of responsibility, but it DEFINITELY is not for everyone. Actually, it's probably not for most people... looking at the divorce rates...

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  • I don't want to deal with a divorce. Let' face it, women today have a different definition of commitment than men do. Commitment to a woman means "I will love you and stay with you... until I change my mind." Shaky foundation to plan your life around, not to mention the way it will fuck up your finances. I know too many guys who ended up homeless after a divorce to get suckered into that trap.

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  • I dread the idea of the wedding itself.

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