My wedding was disappointing, I'm not sure how to feel right now Am I overreacting?

So I'm already married, but we didn't have a reception, so me and my husband saved up to throw a reception party and have the dances and cake etc . I had everything planned out, and everyone else disappointed me greatly. My husbands mom and her husband were dj-ing, and I burned cds and I understand that not everyone is a metalhead like me and my husband are, so I had songs set up for like the first 2 hours and then they could have played whatever they wanted. First, I wated to take pictures before we went in, rounding everyone up for the pictures was a nightmare. Then I wanted to be presented as husbad and wife before walking into the building to a song called "Love at first fright" we were presented, and walked in on clapping and then silence before we got to our table. And then I just turned around noticing our food was still in the refrigerator, so I ran to get that, and I come out of the fridge and THEN the song was playing. I literally told them an HOUR BEFORE. Not to mention I wanted the stereo set up on Friday , but they went over to my husbands sisters house to hang out with the baby instead. I wanted to cry for my husband because his family caters to his POS sister who lives on welfare because she doesn't want to work and has everything handed to her, while my husband busts his ass and if he has any problems, he's on his own with the exception of me. So they played my music while we ate which I had planned to be more of just rock music since I know they don't like my music anyway, but for the dollar dances, I wanted my music. The first metal song that came on, he switched it halfway through and continued to play 80s music. Do I look like I'm in my 50s? No. Do I look like I even have any interest in horrible 80s music? No. What the fuck was that? So I didn't hear the rest of my music for the rest of the night, which was extremely important to me. There were so many people that didn't show up it was crazy. So it was like half empty. No one wanted to dance,


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Reality is a bitch. Not everyone is going to have a wedding like the ones we see on TV. I'm kinda worried about that, actually. I know what you mean about having the place half empty and nobody showing, I've wondered about that and it's kind of whack. That's kinda why, if I got married, I'd hope to heaven that my girl wants something small and private.

    As for the music, ya that sucks. It sucks even more than they're your in-laws and they still couldn't come through. I mean, even if they don't like your music it IS your wedding so they should have done what you wanted. There's no excuse for that. But then again, that's why you don't hire family to do that kind of thing. You would have been better off just setting up your phone to a P. A. system, seriously, then play whatever you wanted.

    About you overreacting: Well, I think you're within your rights. I get it. I think weddings are more of a big deal for chicks anyway so yeah, you're excused. But at the same time it's all water under the bridge. Make mental note of the shit you SHOULDN'T have done then advise your own kids one day of what to avoid, like Rule #1 Don't hire your dead beat family as DJ.

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What Guys Said 8

  • You are putting way too much emphasis on things that ultimately do not matter.

    I hope you and your now husband weren't fooling around sexually before you got married.

    What should matter is that your husband stood before man and God and literally made a sacred, solemn Oath that he would spend the rest of his life with you.

    And you are upset about eighties music being played instead of metal, that most people would not and do not enjoy. (I am a metalhead, I scream and growl till I taste blood in my mouth and have a seven string and full stack, I love to mosh, so don't think I don't get it)

    You also gave your vow that you would forever stick with this man... You are beginning on a life long journey with the man that you love... Who gives a crap about the music and dancing, that is over! What's NOW is that you are WITH him.

    Go wrap your arms around him and kiss his neck, take in his scent and love him (or when he gets home) and cherish the idea that you two have promised to spend the remainder of your lives with one another.

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    • Its true. Sorry your reception wasn't great but just enjoy your new marriage for now.

      I'm sure you will eventually laugh about it to your kids and friends.

  • "Do I look like I even have any interest in horrible 80s music? No. "

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  • Rounding people up for pictures is always hard. Some people just don't want to dance. If you need a redo, just get a few friends and go somewhere where they have live music that you like. See if the venue will give you a reserved table or area. Relax when there and just enjoy your friends who want to wish you well.

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  • this is why if i ever got married, i really would prefer something super simple. I know women tend to have all these complicated fantasies about what their wedding will look like, but i really just want to bypass all that and get to the lovemaking :D

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  • wow Thats so bad

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  • Did you go to Vegas or something I'm pretty sure you had better wedding than most ^.^ be happy you find someone to love for the rest of your life and stop living in a prefect world

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    • Uhm no I'm poor I'm lucky to leave the state. No perfect world here, I new everything wouldn't go according to my plans, but I did think it would be better than it was. I'm more than thankful for my husband, but watching him get upset about how his family excludes him and their blatant disrespect for him was heart-breaking.

  • If someone has the financial ability to do so, traveling to a remote location for the wedding without guests is a great idea to avoid situations like this.
    For those who can't afford it (i. e. essentially everyone) eloping is an alternative! Family drama seems to happen way too often at weddings and I've never understood why. It's the bride and grooms day no one else's

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What Girls Said 6

  • Well damn, that sounds annoying. You have a few opinions here. You can do the wedding over again, or you can let it go and move on with your life. At least now you know where everyone in your life stands, how well they know you and respect your wishes.

    I would probably just let it go if I were you. Life's too short. It's just a wedding. It's the time together with your man that counts. At least to me. :)

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  • Family can mess things up. That's why my husband and I eloped.

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  • Sorry to hear that, but did you get married to spend your life with the man you love or to have a cool party? If the first one, this little troubles shouldn't mean so much to any of you. You are together now, that's the only thing that matters.

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  • Aww I'm sorry! That sucks when things really didn't line up like you planned.

    To be honest, if I ever got married, I'd want to just go to the court house with my mom, dad, sister, fiance of course and his parents. Then we could go out to dinner as a family. Later I wouldn't mind a small dinner with friends, like next day or weekend.

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    • That's pretty much what I did. I was officially married on Halloween and it was small nd we had problems with his family and I got none of the pictures that I wanted, and I wanted to have a reception later on. I shouldn't have wasted my money or time :(

    • Dang I'm so sorry. :(

  • Sorry it went so off-course. I'd probably feel the same way to be honest, but just try to let it go and move on. Maybe one day it'll even seem funny.

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  • im sorry that happened...

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