Do you think being in love is necessary for a marriage to work out?

I never thought marriage was about love. It's about having a family. You can love her, but not necessarily be in love.

Would you marry someone you get along with very well, and know would be a good father/mother even if you're not in love with them?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • For me YES
    But in many cultures NO

    It's more about family imagine, wealth, having kids which is fine but if any of those things fall apart the marriage is pretty much miserable. But they won't divorce because it's frowned upon in most places. With the exception of places like U. S., U. K., Canada

    Based on stories I've read, friends who have parents who did not have love marriages, and parents I've met who told me about their arrange non love marriage I think I'll pass.

    My friends whose parents have arrange marriage usually tell me their parents don't like each other but they make it work. "Hence NO you don't need love"

    However sometimes they do fall in love. And they want their kids to have the same thing/same route.

    On the other hand I met a set of parents before of a friend. They told me about their non love marriage and said they wanted their kids to marry for love.
    I didn't ask their reason but I assume they have a good one. They don't dislike each other and kind of like the description you have they've been good parents. They just want their kids to experience love I guess and they're kids are very happy about that.

    It's really I guess whatever you want to experience
    I rather have a marriage where I'm in love with a person who will be a good mother/father then just have some I love but not like that who's a good mother/father

    Why sell myself short when I can have the full package? Albeit maybe harder to find.

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What Girls Said 10

  • Those are some great questions I will answer all of them.. Lol!!
    Yes I believe being in love is necessary for a marriage. At least to me I am still in love with mine. I been with him 11 years married 8 out of the 11 years. Marriage is about having a family eventually but love I mean be in love has to come first.
    love- means yeah I love you and care for you but that's it
    In love- means I love you like the first time we met years back. I still feel that spark between us that no one could ever take. Its this deep deep love.
    At least that's the way I see it. I don't know about everyone else. I would not marry someone because I got along with them good and know they would be a great father. There has to be love if not I couldn't do it. I have to be in love all the way.

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  • Nope, I think love definitely needs to be there. No wonder so many marriages fail if people think like this.. that it's not necessary.

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  • Being in love isn't necessary. GROWING IN LOVE is. Marriage isn't all about love but it is what keeps the relationship alive. It's a fuel that keeps the engine (marriage) works. You wouldn't want to share your life with someoene and grow old with them if you don't have that feelings for them.

    I personally wouldn't marry someone if I don't love them.

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  • well have you seen the movie "friends with kids" it doesn't lead to a good thing because eventually one will fal, l in love and odds can be that the other won't soo no not a good idea you should better date people who are good people (nurturing , hard worker, kind , honest, devote, loyal, sexual match looks and giving ) and then marry that type of person hahaha just my opinion

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  • It's not necessary, but I sense there will be a lot of cheating going on. Kinda like the aristocrats who all had arranged marriages and various conbubines on the side.

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  • I think you should love whoever you get married to. I wouldn't marry someone that I just get along with

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  • I would marry someone who I can respect and admire.

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  • No. Love is the reason people should get married. Personally I'd never marry a person I don't love even if they were parents material.

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    • would you marry a person you love but that is not parent material? and do you want kids (because of you don't, obviously you don't care about him being parent material)

    • I do want kids so the person i'd marry should be a parent material and the love of my life at the same time.

  • YES it is. I would never marry anyone who I wasn't in love with.

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  • Of course! That's the one thing a marriage must have to work

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What Guys Said 9

  • In my experience love is paramount. Kids won't keep a marriage together if the parents don't love each other. Say you do stay together for the kids, what do you do when they move out?

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  • I think in the beginning, yes. Then as time goes on you grow together and that love matures and becomes different. Not so "puppy love like". It gets solid and real and deep and genuine. Like a combo friend/partnership thing that's been built over time. And if there's kids? It will be an even more partnership like deal type love. In love? Preferred but not necessary. In my opinion.

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  • As long as she understands me, I understand her, share the same values, and we find each other sexy ;-)

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  • I think it's essential

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  • I agree that marriage is about family, not necessarily love, but I think if you're focused on raising children, you should note that it's likely much healthier to do so in a loving environment. And if you plan to spend your entire life with one person, it helps if you love them.

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  • That is old world thinking. There has to be love in order for marriage to work. If they love each other physically and mentally ylthan the marriage will work out better

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  • No love no marriage

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  • I think love is imperative.

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  • Wow! Just... wow!

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