If your fiance' would only marry you if you promised to take her/ his name, would you do it or break it off (no hyphenating) ?

They just want it that way. makes them feel proud that you have their name.

  • Id break it off.
    30% (7)62% (5)39% (12)Vote
  • Id change my name.
    70% (16)38% (3)61% (19)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
yes this question was inspired by another question with a guy asking if he's an asshole for divorcing his wife bc she refuses to take his last name.

it just raised my curiosity. be must expect on some level its work as an ultimatum. so i thought id ask in some form. thanks:)

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I would break it off because if he didn't respect me and my decision enough to keep my name then I wouldn't even want to think about what marriage with him would be like.

    Me and a man like that wouldn't even make it close to marriage in the first place most likely lol.

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    • yeah mer neither. oil just curious to see responses,. but i know what you mean. that kind of outlook would never slip through the radar,.

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    • and well he SHOULD:)

      but its great you found one like that.

    • Thank you :) and yes this site will make you appreciate things you never thought you would lol

What Guys Said 6

  • I would never do this. The mere fact that she would try that crap would tell me that I made the wrong choice. If her commitment to being with me and starting to be a family together wasn't a serious one, I have no interest. I'd be gone

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  • Not sure. It wouldn't really bother me... but my dad's family would disown me (only male heir of a line which can be traced all the way back to 1086).

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    • do you have any sisters? they could always carry it. :)

      but i think the ultimatum, would be the bothersome part.

    • Nope. Got a female cousin but she already took her husband's name.

      And yes. I would have issues with a "yes or no" ultimatum if they were unwilling to negotiate...

    • The kids can still take your name though, so your name would continue its lineage for posterity.

  • Nah I like my last name.

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  • She can take my every thing.

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  • If I were female, yes.

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  • I wouldn't marry her, but I wouldn't dump her.

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What Girls Said 9

  • Break it off because it shows he's unwilling to compromise, and do I want to be married to someone who can't stomach compromising on things? No. Plus I'm the last one in my family with my last name.

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  • This would probably be a matter of how I feel regarding my last name, but I'd bend first and change it.

    Some people are talking about their name's lineage, and how it's important for their family history for their name to go on. Well, I never got my father's last name. I got my mother's married name, pre-divorce.

    She was married to my oldest sister's father, and they were getting a divorce when she had a one-night stand. The protection failed, and she got pregnant with me. Instead of trying to complicate things and make my sister and me seem unrelated, she just gave me my sister's last name.

    Personally, I'm not sure if I want my fiance's last name, due to interracial marriage (he's mexican with four last names), but if i was being forced, I don't think I'd have much of a lineage to worry about by dropping my last name.

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  • I plan on changing my name anyways. I don't have any huge attachment to my current last name. :)

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    • but thats not really the point. if you weren't planning on it and they would;d only marry you if you were. is diff than if you're groin to anyhow.

  • I'd change my name, it's only a name really & I don't really think my last name matches my first name anyways lol

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    • yes but he isn't wanting you to change it bc you dont like your last name.,. he just wants you to. its the principal not the name. well in my opinion lol:)

    • still, I wouldn't really care unless they had a really horrible last name like 'titball' or something like that 😅

  • I already plan on doing this. I consider myself a feminist & so I understand where you're coming from. That's really ridiculous he would break up with her over that. Honestly, now that I think about it, I probably wouldn't want to be with someone like that. It would suck if it took that long and we got to that point already for me to just realize he wasn't right for me.

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  • I would change my name regardless

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  • few minutes ago I just read a question from male anonymous who asked "if my fiance wants to keep her ex-husband last name, should I be offended?". Are these questions seriously related?

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    • well not bc we know each other:) i asked this one after reading that one. thought he might find it helpful. but it also inspired many curiosity.

  • I'm not against taking someone's name (I have done it), but them giving me an ultimatum really bothers me and I don't like that they think they can tell me what MY name should be.

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  • I definitely wouldn't break it off. Personally, I would like to my husband's name😏.

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