How do you feel about having a WEDDING to celebrate your devotion and dedication to your partner and vice versa, but NOT getting married?

I personally think this would be the best of both worlds. Marriages are just a waste of money and an unnecessary social contract, but wedding as a celebration is great!

So I think the ideal is to have a wedding to celebrate your relationship, but without the "actually legally getting married" part.

Yay or nay?

  • YES, having a wedding with no marriage is a pretty good idea! :D
    12% (2)40% (4)23% (6)Vote
  • NO, a wedding is incomplete without a marriage and so it's bad -_-
    62% (10)20% (2)46% (12)Vote
  • ACTUALLY, I hate both weddings and marriages because they are both extremely expensive, I'd prefer netiher.
    26% (4)40% (4)31% (8)Vote
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Updates:
I thought the whole point of a wedding was to get cake and a bunch of food and wear fancy white clothing and celebrate that you're investing your life in someone. I don't see why marriage is required for that, haha.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • No to both, the wedding is one of the reasons I don't want to get married.

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    • I thought the whole point of a wedding was to get cake and a bunch of food and wear fancy white clothing and celebrate that you're investing your life in someone. I don't see why marriage is required for that, haha.

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    • you don't have to have a wedding to get married. just go down to a courthouse.

    • @thewanderingme I just fail to see the point in the whole process, I feel immense social pressure to get a legal contract finalised between my and my partner and it doesn't mean a damned thing to me. Its just social pressure and tradition.

Most Helpful Guy

  • This is a horrible idea to me. The worst part about marriage to me is the wedding. You want me to throw away butt loads of cash for one day to celebrate something I celebrate everyday? The only reason I've ever considered having a wedding is to create some sort of framework for entering into a new chapter of life. Like graduation. But if there is no actual marriage then it's just some random ass day where we go and spend a bunch of cash to make our friends and family stare at us for a while. Personally marriage is kinda pointless to me too but because of how our government treats them and because of the feeling of security and purpose it gives to some relationships/people I'm open to getting married. But never would I have a wedding without a marriage unless I'm marrying myself.

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What Girls Said 5

  • I would actually do that. :) Weddings are basically just that. I would totally do that but just not sign the papers.

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    • A like-minded individual! :D

      Honestly, I know it costs a lot and all, but if we can afford it without going bankrupt, we may as well party once in a while.

    • Well if you're getting properly married, they have an engagement party too which I probably wouldn't do and you wouldn't need that for a fake wedding so you would already have money free!

  • You have a wedding to get married... It's a party... The wedding has no specific significance itself unless there is a marriage to follow. I have a wedding between myself and a rock, but if I didn't marry the rock it would just be a party.

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    • *i could have

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    • You're being obtuse on purpose now. How you were ever chosen as a moderator is beyond me. Blocked and reported for spamming. Cheers.

    • Just so you know, that is not what spamming means.

      Spam means that you are posting questions that do nothing but advertise other websites, that have no questions beyond "message me, what is your kik?".

      Here is the exact excerpt:
      ""Spam – If you include links or personal information for the sole purpose of advertisement or solicitation, your post will be removed. If the post is just advertisement or solicitation, it will be removed.
      - Questions/myTakes asking members to rate the appearance of anyone other than yourself will be removed.
      - Questions/myTakes only asking for others to chat will be removed as Spam.""

      What you were looking for is either "offensive", but I am not persecuting nor antagonizing anyone in any way, or "nonsense", but this is a completely legitimate question in the correct topic. So it is most likely that your report will be rejected.

      This is just an informative note for the future. It is easier for the admins if the users enforce the guidelines properly.

  • I'd honestly rather have no wedding and just the marriage.

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    • Is it because when you get divorced, you get to have like half of his stuff?

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    • @thewanderingme This is totally a "correlation does not imply causation" thing.

      https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/correlation.png

      Just because you're raised outside of marriage doesn't necessarily mean you'll be sexually abused, this is absurd. My father was constantly yelling at my mother and they were married; marriage certainly didn't fix their problems either.

    • more likely to is what it's saying, not definitely will. you seemed to graze over the fact that parents are less likely to try working out their issues if they're not married

  • so, really just a double reception.. of sorts?

    meh.

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  • I don't want a wedding. I'm still unsure about marriage, but I never really wanted a wedding. If I did, it'd be super small, like 6-10 people max. That's more of a get together than a wedding.

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What Guys Said 7

  • I've long had this opinion. I like the "magic" of rituals and ceremony, even to someone who doesn't believe in literal magic (w/e the fudge that is) I think ritual and such are good psychological tools for people. I certainly enjoy it, we should celebrate everything and draw meaning from everything.

    But since I'm not religious I'd have to have my own version of a ceremony that doesn't have all the "traditional" wedding junk. I'd probably have to make up my own ritual and what it would mean to me it a love ritual celebrating a relationship and you just repeat/renew it every few years or so. So even if you break up it's not like it was a "forever type thing" that requires divorce proceedings or anything like that.

    The only reason marriage (as distinct from weddings) would be appealing is if there is legal/financial benefits and if that's the case I'd probably just marry by best friend because he and I probably won't have problems, then we'd reap the benefits reliably whilst still having girlfriends. But if that's all marriage is they for then it becomes this arbitrary thing so it should probably be removed from the law altogether.

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  • If it works for them then yes, personally marriage is a bit dangerous currently due to divorce. It would be a good compromise if thats something you want. Personally I hate weddings, not a fan of crowds, or parties or meeting relatives you don't actually know but feel bad when talking to them because you don't remember there names but they seem to know you. Not my cup of tea.

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    • hahaha, this is how I feel about weddings. though, if I do ever get married I'd like a small intimate wedding with those close to us.

    • @thewanderingme That wouldn't be so bad.

  • That would be cool, yes.

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  • Sounds like you both need to get married.

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  • A "wedding" is a religious ceremony that marries two people. Anything else is just civil marriage.

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  • Surely it is the wedding that costs the money not the marriage as such. I have always seen marriage as the important part and the wedding as the capitalist institution that society says we must have. I would rather run off and have a romantic but cheaper marriage somewhere then spend thousands of pounds on what is essentially a huge party but without the commitment of marriage.

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  • Weddings are expensive, why not just skip to the honeymoon.

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    • Hey, anything fun takes money nowadays, from laser tag to hiking through just travelling to the beach

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