What's the longest you'd wait after an engagement to get married?

Let's say money, school, and work aren't an issue.
How long of pushing back the wedding date would you just give up
or start feeling that the engagement was to just keep you around?

  • 1 year
    30% (20)29% (9)30% (29)Vote
  • 2 years
    42% (28)26% (8)37% (36)Vote
  • 3 years
    7% (5)10% (3)8% (8)Vote
  • 4 years
    9% (6)3% (1)7% (7)Vote
  • 5 years
    3% (2)0% (0)2% (2)Vote
  • 6+ years
    9% (6)32% (10)16% (16)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
I'm 24 he's 27
were both employed
I have a house
He "says" he wants to go back to school for the 3rd time later this year but he's already dropped out of 2 programs
I already said I don't mind a cheap wedding with a few friends and family
He says maybe we should wait longer.
I'm feeling strung along honestly
Were at 6 years :(

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Most Helpful Guy

  • i didn't vote on a timeframe. in my opinion (or my preference an engagement shouldn't be entered into without a time frame established, if not before then shortly after the engagement. i guess at max i'd give a person a year and then expect a date to be set and plans start to be made. so even if the date is 2,3,4 years out i'd want to start making preliminary plans, looking at/discussing venues, etc

    how long have you been waiting? it doesn't look like you mentioned that.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • 2 years is more than sufficient to pick a date and location and plan the wedding. If we had a specific reason to want to do it on a later date (for example my friends who were engaged 3 years so they could get married on their 9 year anniversary and thus celebrate their 10 year / 1 year married) then that's different... but I wouldn't get engaged if I'm not ready to be married within a year or two.

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What Guys Said 11

  • He will never make anything happen so it's up to you to take action. . . or not.

    https://youtu.be/rKVWhBX2zMU

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    • Sorry you got to the "Guys and Dolls" reference first. I didn't know.

    • @Jackblue I conducted the orchestra for our college production of Guys And Dolls, approximately 20 years before you were born. Yes, I got there first! :)

  • I think it depends on how long we had been together prior to the engagement. If we had been together for like 5 years before getting engaged, and everything was looking good, then I'd be comfortable getting married the same year we got engaged.

    But if we were only together for a year or two prior to getting engaged, and it felt a little rushed, then I think it'd be a good idea to eait a fee years between getting engaged and getting married.

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  • A year , if it takes any longer , that can mean we are either emotionally and or financially not ready for marriage.

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  • Lady, I was once a gambler hunted by the police and engaged to this doll Adelaide from Rhode Island for fourteen years but never married her. I was just too wild. Then I lost a bet against my best friend Sky Masterson and had to go with him to a prayer meeting where I learned to be a better man and married Adelaide. Then we all sang "When You See A Guy" to a cheering audience.

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  • 6+ years is fine by me, im in no rush to find out whether this person is good for me in the long term.

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  • My wife and i waited a year before we got married. We wanted to be together a total of two years before we made it permanent.

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  • was engaged for 6 years for the main reason I was looking for a better job and I couldn't deal with her controlling ways. She would read through text messages on my phone when I was in the bathroom, and go through my email when I was in the shower

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  • Your being stringed along.

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  • 3 years max.

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  • If you see your partner every week, you sometimes go on holiday together and you often enjoy a meal together at your or his/her home, I think three years can be OK.

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    • We live together already :O

    • I know some other guys who are living together with their girlfriends and don't want to get married. That's not my style, I think two good reasons to wait are because you want to know better the other person or you are still enjoying your single life.

  • forever, it is also the shortest time i would wait.

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What Girls Said 16

  • I don't see much point in getting engaged if we weren't both ready to get married relatively soon. I'd probably hope to tie the knot not much more than a year after getting engaged.

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  • If nothing else was an issue then within two years I think I'd expect to be married. Probably closer to the 1 year mark, but up to two.

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  • I don't understand people who "get engaged" and then wait 10 years to get married

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    • If you've been engaged for a year and still don't have a date set... you aren't getting married...

  • The fact that he keeps pushing the date back is stupid. He needs to either be a man who loves you and commit, or be upfront about it. I don't need marriage to be happy with someone because I think it's just paper, but I'd still be pissed if I was promised a wedding and it kept getting conveniently moved.

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  • Nope. If he wanted a marriage then go to city hall and get a certificate, that is what a marriage is. If he's putting it off with excuse after excuse, he doesn't care too much and you're waiting around accepting it.

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  • 6 YEARS? damn..

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  • 3 years.

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  • 2 years is a good amount of time. 3 year tops.

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  • 1 month

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  • 6 or more, but that's cause we've been together since high school

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  • I'd like to get married about a year or year and a half after I'm engaged

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  • A year or two at most. I'm not very patient. And it just doesn't make sense to wait too long.

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  • I think 2-3 years is ideal for me.

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  • I wouldn't even wait a year. Im the type though that doesn't want a big wedding just a trip to the court house/town hall and get it done.

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  • 2 years tops. If we're going to wait 3+ years then why are we getting engaged in the first place? The whole point of the engagement is to start planning the wedding.

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    • so the guy that propose to you needs to marry you 2-3 months after that.

    • Show All
    • @carlitoswayy you usually have to book the venue 6 months to a year in advance.

    • the venue? backyard of the house. i just need your company to be happy baby.

  • this is a hard question... bc there is no such thing as not having a reason to wait. There's always a reason: school, money, family (convinicing them)... etc.
    And if there's no issue, then there's a problem. Unless, you're too young to be married yet, which makes complete sense... but then that means yous till have a reason: school.

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    • he's 27 and im 24

    • i mean to say there is always a reason for the wait...
      I'm not just saying about age.

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