Would you want to be in a polygamous marriage if it was legal?

Why or why not? If so, what kind of polygamous marriage? Multiple husbands or multiple wives?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Eeeeefeeeeeeeeeehehhhh, no. Marriage is still marriage. It'll have the same issues as just one on one marriage. It'll get boring, then you'll want someone else. Though. I would say I would consider polygamous marriage more than monogamous marriage. Multiple wives would be nice. Though, I wouldn't be part of the multiple husband thing. You could call it a double standard, but it's just my preference. At the same time, I would tell women who wanted/had multiple husbands "Have fun." Or people who had multiple husbands and wives. "That's great; not for me."

    I don't care if she/they go off and fuck or get extra affection from other guys, but I don't wanna know the guys.

    Ideally, I would be with one chick, and we would both just fuck whomever we wanted, then come back to each other. We would live our lives together, but would supplement that relationship with other people. So, I guess you could call that polyamory. But involving marriage just doesn't make sense to me. Some weird contractual obligation, so the government or the church can tell you how in love you are. Kinda bullshit.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Not in this lifetime. NOT even if we were immortal.
    First, I don't share and have NEVER shared my partners. Nor will I allow myself to be shared.

    Let me be clear, I want a 'dom'. Don't get this confused with a man who does whatever he wants sexually, or a man who just liked rough sex, or the sterotypical one where a dominant (NOT a dom) has multiple subs.

    I mean, a man who not only has physical, but mental/emotional control over me. Takes the time to condition me, my body, to react to everything he says and does.

    It takes time to build that trust, that level of control, but the connection is intense. The 2 men who have taken time to build this with me, were 'dom'.

    They'd send something as simple as "I'm turned on" or a keyword/phrase [[which I won't say, because I'm still conditioned to be aroused by hearing/seeing them]].

    Allowing a man to have such a HUGE amount of control over me. It takes a SERIOUS amount of trust, and that takes time to build.

    ** Taking the time, energy, and the emotions to do all of that, why in the hell would I want more than one person? Why would my partner? I should meet all of their needs **

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What Guys Said 66

  • No because the majority of people can't handle one person so how would they possibly be able to do handle being in a relationship with multiple people. Each one would require insane amount of open communication (most people have trouble communicating with their one spouse) being able to balance work life and home life and personal life is hard, now add a second person who requires just as much time from you as the first, then a third etc its not a good setup for a happy and healthy individual. Then factor in the high failure rate of polyamorus and open relationships and you have a whole lot of reasons not to do it (not to mention its negative impact on children (even if every one of them is involved and you could divi up your time between work your personal space, your wife/husband, your second wife/husband your thrid wife/husband and still have time to dedicate to your children you still run into the problem of authority ie multiple people multiple views who has final say? And the issue of to many cooks in the kitchen, so to speak.). So no its a terrible idea that has no practical function beyond being able to have sex with multiple people, and if sex is your top priority then clearly your not ready for a relationship to begin with.

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  • Absofuckinglutely not. I'm not sharing and neither do I want to be shared. If I'm with someone, I'm with ONLY them and no one else. Polygamous relationships, in my eyes, are pretty much cheating masked as something quasy-normal.

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  • Even if it were permitted, I think it would become too complicated trying to satisfy two or three wives. I am fine with the thought of one woman. It is easy to keep things fresh and fun with just one person, it just involves using the effort you would take to meet someone else, and applying to your girl or guy!

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    • What if you were the second husband in a FMM type of marriage?

    • No thanks, I prefer not to share my woman and would hope that she would feel the same way. I would hope that I alone would be sufficient to stimulate both her mind and body.

    • It would feel like a competition for affection in that type of setup, if she wants that, then don't marry anyone and just play the field the rest of her life.

  • Thats like asking me if i would like a shorter lifespan. Its already bad enough that many men want to check out early because of one woman... i can imagine multiple... probably fake their own death.

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  • "Two's bound to kill ya, all you need is one/To constantly bug you to get her hair done"
    http://youtu.be/MUsaSCRdtYI

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  • No way. Trying to make 1 woman happy is hard enough.

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  • Instinctively, yes, but realistically, no.

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  • LOL, sounds like a good idea (rollseyes). But then that also would potentially meant multiple divorces happening at the same time too right? Oh fuck... I think I'm gonna have no choice but to pass on such a wonderful offer lol

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  • "Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same."-- Oscar Wilde

    One wife is PLENTY!

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  • I probably wouldn't afford two women xD

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  • If gays can marry, then there is no logical reason why people cannot be married to more than one person.

    I have had multiple girlfriends at the same time, and even two bisexual ones at the same time (It was great!).

    It will take a while for society to accept polygamy again. The Catholic Church dies hard.

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  • Hell no!
    With every woman comes her mother. One mother-in-law is more than enough.
    Also, the home would turn into a PMT hell.
    When women live together, their menstrual cycles synchronise. It is one of nature's strange quirks.
    One woman who turns into an axe murderer for three to four days each month is difficult enough to cope with.
    Two, three, four, or more such women? No freaking way!

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  • Nope, too jealous to share a lover!

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  • No.

    The idea of have multiple girls to have sex with is appealing on some level but I don't want to be financially and emotionally invested into more than one woman at the same time.

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  • What's the point? We already have people who have multiple partners, they're called cheaters. Marriage is for true love between two people.

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  • Marriage is between one man and one woman.
    Sure you could have an open marriage and have a relationship with other people but at the end of the day there has to be one mom and one dad to take care of the child.
    Having multiple parents can be just as dysfunctional as not having a father/mother.

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  • Only if there is 1 male (me) in equation and FFF as many as you wants... Chick's making out with each other it's even hotter then supernova

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  • Too much dedication and money out the window

    Although at least one of them are bleeding the others are still available

    I guess the setup has its perks

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    • Women who live together tend to merge their cycles together so the perks you are talking about might not really be there. Instead of one nagging pissed of woman you can have two or three. If there is a definition of hell on earth that's probably it.

    • @Mateus1 LMAO. I'm dying. xD

    • @Princess_Rue Laughing is good for you. Glad I made you laugh. :)

  • I cannot wait to see how the first polygamous lesbian divorce case goes. A bunch of women killing each other over gets the largest cup of blood, except there will not be a man the judge can automatically blame.

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  • Just a small clarification to the question.
    Polygamy = 1 man + multiple wives
    Polyandry = 1 woman + multiple husbands
    Polyamoury = multiple partners in many different combinations.
    Monogamy = 1 woman + 1 man or 1man + 1 man or 1woman + 1woman

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  • Like financially, how would that work? At what point would i stop being a provider and just some dude that's shacking up with a different wife every night. Having anything more than 1 wife is to much.

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  • Sex wise, would be fun but... trying to keep up with more than one woman outside of the bedroom? No thanks, haha.

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  • I really don't care. It doesn't apply to me. I'd try finding someone who thinks similarly, in terms of they only want to be with one person, but I don't really care. Doesn't affect me so I really don't care.

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  • I'd be in a polyandrous marriage.

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  • Nope. One woman is enough! Thats all I can handle lol

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  • no. .

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  • I wouldn't want to be married regardless. Still find the legal system behind marriage screwed up. Especially for men.

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  • No. It's still marriage, which means I won't do it.

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  • Ya, basically a small group of friends who r all cool n sleep together. Already happening. Everywhere.

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  • Fuck No. Why would I want double or triple the emotional, mental, physical, and financial stress as one wife?
    Wouldn't mind having sex with multiple women at once, but that's the only benefit to more than one wife.
    The sex isn't worth it

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What Girls Said 49

  • Absolutely not. Marriage in general is hard. Why make it harder? And complicated at the same time? You can not meet everybody needs and somebody is going to feel neglected. This is a factor of lust not love. And even when they say that they have a loving relationship. Look at their body language, deep in their eyes, focus on context clues, look at past patterns. They reveal the true nature about their relationship. 9/10x's everybody hides something just like a monogamous marriage. I would not be happy and call it quits. Why torture myself?

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    • Why do you think you can meet all of somebody's needs in a monogamous relationship?

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    • @Mateus1
      Evolution doesn't care about ANYTHING except reproduction. BUT the sex ratio evolves to nest suit that success.

    • @Intraluminal No the ratio is there to provide choice and that's exactly what I meaant. Some man will sleep with more than one woman and will have more kids by more than one woman. On the other hand some will get married and make a woman happy because they are faitfull but there is chance they'll raise one or more kids that are not their's. Simple is in it.

  • Its permitted in my partners country of origin.
    It's my biggest nightmare. No way.
    Involving another person shows lack of respect and partnership.
    It takes so much commitment to grow as a person and a family.
    Imagine involving another woman's ideas to how the family should be.

    It would only work if the husband was LITERALLY the head of the household over every decision and the women don't really care about him. Just want a provider.

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  • I wouldn't mind multiple husbands because they'd all be worth my time, love, and affection. I also wouldn't take more than I can handle.

    I wouldn't like to be in a marriage with multiple wives because I don't want to have to wait for my turn to have sex and I'm not taking care of my sister wives kids. Yeah I'm selfish like that.

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  • Nope, the life style is simply not for me, I don't desire to share or be shared. I think it's much more manageable for me to have a monogamous relationship.

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  • No, I'm only interested in a mutual committed relationship with one man. I wouldn't be happy in that type or marriage.

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  • Its no more wrong than gay marriage so it should be a choice. Its really only something that wealthy oldee men could afford and if there was a lot of it there would be a lot of bitter single young men who would never get to marry as all the wealthy old men have taken all the young women as wives. Think about for polygamy to work there would at least need to be three women for every man on the planet so unless two thirds of the male population die out through war or disease or we start choosing the gender of our babies mathematically it can't work out.

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  • Nope. Risk of STIs is just too high. On the social aspect, can you imagine even TRYING to navigate/negotiate the attention-needing aspect of multiple partners (forget if they're even the slightest bit the jealous-type)? Sweet jesus.

    The sure-fire way to kill your relationship is to have more than one. I see no reason why this saying becomes any less-valid in a polyamorous setting.

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  • Haha, I was just doing a round of what ifs with my boyfriend, meh said no, I'm more open than I should be if Keanu Reeves is involved. 💕

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  • Nope.

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  • No way lol I can't.

    The only situation I would accept it is: Apocalyptic scenario where many men passed away and we need to revive the population. Lol.

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  • No. Not at all. I still do want it to be legal though because just because it's not for me, it doesn't mean other people aren't into it.

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  • no. i dont share.

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  • no, because I wanna be the only one he loves; no other girls.

    I am not interested in having multiple husbands. That's weird.

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    • Nothing is weird. It's pretty normal for some people. You may be the only one he loves, but chances are, you are not going to be the only one he fucks. Love and sex are two different things in a man's brain so get used to it.

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    • OK religion !
      Heart is a mussel that pumps blood and has nothing to do with relationships. If you ditched your religious believes and educated yourself, you might have known that. I will not go in to the details of how love comes about and what it is, because it's hopeless to explain that to a religious person.

    • @Mateus1 lol okay dude

  • Hell naw, I won't live with man for whom I am not the only one.
    Tho polyandry sounds good. I would feel good with 3-4 hot hubbies xD

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  • Nope because another woman trying to touch my man get's her ass beat and I really don't want to go to prison

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  • No thanks. I'm too selfish when it comes to men.

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    • baha not once did the thought of sharing a man even cross mah filthy mind when I read this question...

      ahahah oh boy

  • Hell no. Ain't sharing my husband with anyone. Go find your own honey pie 😂😂

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  • Hello no, that's just perverted.

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    • Marriage for love was considered lunacy and perverted 200 years ago. What makes it less perverted now?

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    • I wasn't mad at you I'm just stating facts. You have some reading to do girl, and you better get going. I will post a list of books on here for you to read and understand modern world relationship dynamics and how the human brain works in general. You can read the books and understand what I'm talking about or you can keep your moral head buried in the sand and keep wondering why your life is screwed up. As to meeting girls, never had a problem and if you are up to the challenge I'll meet you to. May be we could clear up some of the misunderstandings around relationships.
      Books:
      1. You are not so smart. - David McRaney
      2. You are now less dumb. - David McRaney
      3. The red queen. - Matt Ridley
      4. Mating in captivity. - Esther Perel
      5. Sapiens: A brief history of Humankind. - Yuval Noah Harari
      6. Sex at dawn. - Christopher Ryan, Cacilda Jetha
      When you are done with these books you'll have a clearer understanding of how the world really works.

      :) You can prevent AIDS with condoms :)

  • Ehhh, nah. I wouldn't really because I can only be attracted to one person at the time. So my husband would have my sole attraction and love.

    So I am a one man's woman :)

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  • I would rather be celibate for the rest of my life than to share a man with another woman.
    Nor would I be interested in sharing myself with multiple men.

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  • Nope, I am strictly monogamous.
    I want one man and one man only.
    I want to be that man's one and only as well.

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    • Not likely thou. Statistically is more likely one of you, or both of you will have sex with another person. It's the nature of human beings. And the more we idealize monogamy the more disappointed we are.

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    • Luckily by the time you go against your word, your brain will have deleted your current thoughts, so you won't feel like "scum bag" to use you own words. I just love 18 years old's that know it all. :)

    • @Mateus1 Good thing I won't be going against my word then :)

  • I practice polyandry (having multiple male partners) and I would love to be able to have several husbands one day! Unless it's legalized, we'll only be life partners.

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  • Fuck no.

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  • Hell no... I dont want my man to be with another woman

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  • May be better for me that way. I dont know if i WANT to but its a logical option for some people. can't really predict what ill want down the road.

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  • No I couldn't do it. I want one man and I do not want to share him.

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  • If everyone had really good chemistry it would be awesome. Multiple incomes, more people to have sex with, more people to do chores/cook/look after kids.

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  • Fuck no

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  • Nope. I want my relationship to be special and mean something and you can't have that when you have 5 other husbands/wives.

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  • I don't think so...

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