We're both 25 years of age, and we've been together since high school. It's just when we started dating, I did it out of spite for my parents because I wasn't allowed to date. Regardless, itll be 10 years we are together next year (4 years married) - but I legit do not feel any attraction towards him. I do not want to sleep together, I get annoyed when he touches me. I 'love' him, in the way that we do things for each other and I do the wife-y household things he likes but ultimately, starting a new life elsewhere and actually experiencing meeting other people is a very high want for me right now. We don't have any serious as of yet - meaning no kids, no mortgage, anything like that, etc. And I have been feeling this way for about 3-4 years now.
What do you guys think? I have tried counseling myself. He has not. He loves me a lot - more than anything. I just don't feel it anymore.
But... I've been in a rut and unhappy for so long - I would just leave but I can't stand the fact that my parents, his parents, and most of all him, would be crushed and would hate me forever. That's really the main reason I am restraining to do so.
Most Helpful Guy
I have read some of the comments and I disagree. I see people say it's not fair for the both of y'all that your not happy and since there is not a lot of investment then do it.
You married out of spite not love, he married out of love. My view is you are suffering the consequences. If you leave him you will be happy and he will suffer. Honestly I say talk to him about it and let him decide. It is afterall a deci2
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Most Helpful Girl
... I've been in a rut and unhappy for so long...
With having what I see is the "Seven year itch" and all here, dear, you never were given a Chance for Other Romance, to enjoy being a girl nor had an Opportunity to Explore any other guy as well, I can tell. You never had a Chance to go out and just Live like a normal teen. This was Robbed from you, thanks to your parents.
It has now come down to this, and the longer it goes on, the more unhealthy your situation and marriage will be for you both.
I feel that perhaps a Long Break away from one another might be the Best from the Rest and a real Test, at least for the moment. If you could go and stay away with someone in your family, maybe even a friend, give yourself a think things out and to ponder over even if you are Missing the Kissing and some His and Her History you both have shared. This might help.
By just making a Clean Break, you could find it is a Mistake. And Remember, the Grass is not always Greener on the other side.
Counseling yourself is good, but maybe a Real one can also give you a Helping Hand with with this Man.
My sister finally split up with her husband after the kids got older but believe it or not, she is still Residing with him under the Same roof Because... She cannot live without him and he cannot live with out her but they both have the space but still share the Face every day.
Give it some thought. I don't want you to wake up one day and say "I should have left when I was older." At least for now, you can be sure what you think is Best for you and a Break, I believe, is a good Start from your Heart.
However, if you do find that it is time to Go, then do it carefully and consider the man who still loves you. Many couples remain friends to the Ends, even Helping one another out or just remaining buds instead.
Go Slow with this Flow. Many years have been Invested.
Good luck. xx0
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