Why aren't I engaged/married?

I'm 19 and I'm not married. I know it seems young but I feel like both my cousins, around my age, are on their way to engagement, and it sucks that I'm not. Since I was little, all I've dreamed of was having a family and a husband, but it still hasn't happened. I don't understand why.my longest relationship was only 8 months (I ended it, though, for good reason). Am I too young to be worried about this? I'm not even sure if I want marriage now, I just want it before I'm 30. What do I do?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Honey marriage isn't all it's cracked up to be. Yeah the big ring and the big dress and partying in Vegas all week is super awesome but you have to go home and be a wife. It is dealing with the same man day after day month after month. You get the picture. You are never free from, "Did you feed the dog?" or, "Have you ironed my shirt yet?" or, "Did you call about that bill yet?" It is a big turn off! It really sucks the passion out of a relationship when you converse about who is going to clean the left overs out of the fridge. It's always me. Yes you get to have steady sex with someone you aren't afraid of what they could give you but even that gets dull. You will try things to spice it up but when he never adds anything new in the bedroom you will wish you hadn't been so stupid. Trust me. I think unless you are required by your religion I would avoid it all together. If you want a big fancy party with a big dress and a big ring then throw one for yourself, buy them for yourself. You never know who you will meet and you don't want to be tied into a commitment when you meet them. Just make sure the men in your life know your thoughts on marriage and extended commitment before you start anything romantic with them. Over rated.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Your crazy! I refuse to get married until at least 28 because I know I'd get pulled back into the party scene if I decided to marry earlier.

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What Girls Said 6

  • Don't be in such a hurry. It is this mentality that causes relationships to be rushed into and then ripped apart by reality. Some people don't find their true love until they are 60 or even 70. Some at 40. It takes time to build a strong relationship. 19 is a baby.even 25 is young (I'm 25). You have yet to go out and experience things.

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  • Ha, ok trust me you have your entire life to endure the torture device that is marriage.

    Ok well it's not torture as long as you are with the right person, just keep in mind that the longer you wait the better the chance is of you making the right decision and choosing someone you can really love and settle down with. I know you have heard this before but marriage has a lot of little things with it. Like you can't parry, drink and whatnot, to me not so important anymore, as a teen very important you need to wait and become who you are mean to be before you go looking for you you should be with, that's just me though.

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    • Wow I hadn't really thought of that. I always assumed my husband would party with me!

  • your 19 that's a long way off. I'm 22 and want the same but I'm really not worrying about it as its simple you could meet MR RIGHT when your 29 and still be settled or married by the time your 30 so really you have plenty of time. Live life for now and don't worry about the future just enjoy yourself. After all even if you get married at 30 and live till your 100 that's 70 years with 1 man so you really have you whole life ahead of you

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  • In a good part of the world the average age for marriage is 30.so yes, you're way too young to worry. You're way under the average even for the US.

    Most guysnear your age aren't eager for marriage and family yet, as you can see, so don't force it. That's just asking for a painful break up and if it involves children it will be for sure a lifetime's worth of problems.

    Relax and let things come in their own time!

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  • I am sorry but you really deserve a reality slap in the face. You are 19, why are you even thinking of marriage. I can promise you half of your friends who are getting married so early will be divorced by 30. Your at an age where you are still experimenting and finding out what you want in a partner. Most young marriages end quickly because they overlook important parts of creating a lasting marriage. First of all, are you established in life, have a career and you life together? If you answered NO then you shouldn't be married. The number one cause of divorce is finance problems. You really need to enjoy your life as a young woman because when you get married it all ends. it is not a peaches and cream like you see on those made up love stories. its work!.

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  • yeah your too young to be worrying about it. 19 is tooo young to get married. I'm 20 and I'm not engaged or anything, I'm too young to do that. just because your cousins are doing it does mean you should. you'll get married when the time is right, just don't rush it

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