How can I get my boyfriend to be around my family?

he says he don't like them but he doesn't even know them.im a family person and it gets on my nerves that he don't like going to family parties because he don't like them. help please.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • How long have you been with your boyfriend? Some guys think that meeting the family is a HUGE step (don't ask me why). They might think you're trying to make it too serious too fast. Just a thought.

    If that is what his worries are then I would tell him that it is nothing like that and that you think it's just polite. It's not a big deal to you. Just try not to make it a bigger deal than it is because that could lead him to think it's a big serious step for him to make.

    Hope this helps!

    Good luck!

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    • The general male line of thought is that a family doesn't want to meet each of a girl's latest flings, so she only takes guys she's serious about -- if he's not interested in an LTR, he'll resist meeting her family for as long as possible. If he agrees to meet them, he's getting involved in something he doesn't necessarily want. When/if they break up, he's "the ex" every time they see him, rather than some random guy they never met. Like going on a trip together, it's usually not done casually.

    • Show All
    • Hmmm... I don't know then.. That is somewhat strange... Do you complain about them a lot? Maybe that's part of it....?

    • No he's just weird I guess he had a ruff time with his family..

What Guys Said 5

  • You can't get anyone to do anything. The more you push him and nag your boyfriend, the more he'll resent it.

    Try introducing one family member at a time, over lunch or something casual. Your boyfriend might respond better to meeting one person individually than meeting your entire family all at once. After he's met a few of the family he might be more willing to attend a big party.

    Good luck!

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    • One more thing:

      How long have you dated this guy? If it's a relatively short time, he might not feel ready to meet your family. It's a big step.

    • 4 years and we live together and have 2 kids

    • Okay, he needs to man up and meet your family. That's crazy of him.

  • Your boyfriend is a retard. If he doesn't understand that your family is important to you, then he doesn't get it. Leave him. Before you know it, he'll put you in a position where you have to choose him or your family.

    leave the dumbass! I bet you'll find someone that like you for who you are, that's more than just being a "trophy" girlfriend.

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  • I always hated meeting parents because girls parents and family are the most judge mental pricks on earth and all they ever do is nit pick about your job, your past and they pick out your flaws and find reasons for the girl to dump you and most guys are well aware of this situation so if you love this guy do not push him into a mess he should be avoiding until you are engaged, then the family will usually know that the relationship has gone to far for them to try to break it up if they don't like him. If the relationship is new it is far to easy for a parent to say we don't like him and you would dump him like a rock to make them happy and most guys know that as well so it is best to leave your family out of it until he is ready or your engaged.

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    • What an extraordinary thing to write! I'm sorry to hear you've had such bad experiences but I don't believe that all guys "know" what you're saying, because it isn't true. There are five girls in my family, and my parents very nice to them. They didn't like one of them, but they were polite to him and they didn't go out of their way to break him and my sister up. Sounds like you've just been unlucky!

    • Meeting your girlfriend's family can be a huge stress...

  • Strap him to a wheelchair and gag him and leave him in the centre of the room. That's what we did.

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  • Well if you've been living together for this long time and he already met you'r parents

    and not the rest of the family I don't see its a big deal in it .

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What Girls Said 6

  • Wait a minute. . . your profile says you have 2 kids with this guy? Is this correct? Jeeez he should have met your family long before those kids came on the scene! Tell him to get his act together, be a man, and face the family!

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  • I'm inclined to say if he doesn't like your family, and he's not prepared to put up with them for your sake, you can do better. I hated my exes family, and I did what your boyfriend is doing and refused to go anywhere the family was going to be, and that's how I ended up the ex. My Dad hates my mum's family, but he still goes with her to family gatherings and just puts up with it. That's what a decent person in love should do. I agree that guys seem to think it's a serious step, but I'd hardly call it rushing a committment after 4 years!

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  • some guys don't like meetting parents or family or anyone like that ebcause they feel like its a serious commitment step and they don't want that or they aren't ready for it. so maybe he's just not ready adn he's just being over defensive. I would say don't push it and if down the line he's still that way when you love to be around family, then he isn't the guy for you. hope everythign works out.

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  • Invite them round on a day when you know he can't escape, and have them sit down and chat together. If he doesn't like them after that, I have no idea what to do.

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    • "on a day when you know he can't escape?"

      I doubt her boyfriend would respond well to a surprise attack...

    • Well not an attack, but you know, invite them over and say they've come to meet you, and just demonstrate how well you get on with them, then maybe he'll start feeling the same way.

  • some people think that's a big commitment in a relationship

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  • well did you tll him it would mean a lot to you if he did?

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