A married man has been calling me for some time now. Why would a married man do this?

A married man has been calling me for some time now. Tells me he is gonna try to work things out at home. Fine. Good for him. But why continue to call me. Anyway, he tells his wife that we are just friends but yet I know she is suspicious, as I would be. Anyway, he was on vacation a few weeks back. He takes his wife and kids to a local amusement park and while they were all in the car with him, he calls me up and acts like he wanted to know about a local restaurant. I did not buy that that was the reason he called. Don't know if she did. It just upset me that he would do that. What made him do that. Is that not disrespectful to his wife? Is that not what he was trying to do, to hurt her.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Perhaps he is trying to keep his options open? Maybe he is using you to get back at his wife, but at the same time trying to work on the issues back home. If they cannot reconcile and work out their issues, perhaps he thinks keeping things open with you is a good for him because he could just come after you if his marriage falls apart.

    Honestly, I would just step away from this situation. He is married and should be trying to reconcile things back home. Plus why be just another option for someone? I don't think you should have to sit on the sidelines. Are you guys really just friends? I think having friends is good, but this situation is pretty confusing for both sides it looks like. I really do think he is trying to keep you on the side in case his marriage falls apart.

    I personally would just distance myself. You don't need the drama if their marriage does fall apart. I'm sure you don't want an angry ex wife calling you, even if you haven't done anything wrong, blaming you for the marriage failing. It's not your fault though, they should be working on things. But if he isn't fully committed to working things out, which is what it seems. Then I would definitely distance yourself.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Perhaps he values your female opinion, but it sounds like he's using you to irk his wife.

    Personally, this guy should clearly state what he wants from your current relationship. I find it odd, too, based on what you've posted.

    Interesting situation, and I'm quite confused at this guy!

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What Girls Said 3

  • Are you really looking for answers here or justification for what you are doing? You know why he is doing this, of course you do. And you are encouraging his behavior. Shame on you. He is a married man & you have known it from the beginning. Stay out of it. If his marriage fails, let it fail without your interference. If he cheats with you, he'll cheat on you.

    He has children. You will always be the woman who broke up their parent's marriage & their family. So keep on doing what you are doing, tell yourself it's not your fault, but this will all come back on you. One day his kids will look you in the eye & you will have to face them.

    Walk away from this mess. Let him deal with it himself. He is not the only one being disrespectful here.

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  • You don't have to answer his calls.

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  • Are you two having/had an affair? How does his wife know you?

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