Guys, what do you think about girls who want to wait until marriage?

Well, I mean what do you think about girls wanting to delay sex until marriage ?

Is it a turn off ?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • this one guy I knew who was always checking out girls seemed like a flirt, and very sexy too, which made me assume he's definitely experienced, told me that he's a virgin. I didn't even ask him or anything, he just randomly brought it up because we were discussing marriage and best part: he also told me he wants to marry a virgin. It made me see him in a new light and respect him, and guess what I like him.just trying to figure out if he likes me too =/

    so don't worry, you don't need to have sex with a guy to prove your love for him.yea sex is part of humanity its uncontrollable, but the human race also follows culture and self-respect.if you love yourself, ull wait after marriage, there's no rush. =]

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    • Yeah, I agree =)

    • Be careful guys know this "makes you see him in a new light" and often lie about stuff like this

    • If you love yourself? so you're saying that if I don't wait until marriage, I don't love myself?

What Guys Said 17

  • "Is it a turn off?"

    If it was someone my age, 32. Id think they were a nutter.

    When I was eighteen I did know girls who wanted to stay virgin till marriage.

    It was it as a hands off statement. Kinda like saying I'm not looking for a boyfriend or I like girls or wearing a burqa. We can be friends, but we can never date, I only look for boyfriends at church. (Oh, and at 18 I wasn't really looking for sex and was still a virgin my self, its just a very intimidating comment to make to someone.)

    So yes its a massive turn off, in fact saying I DONT WANT TO HAVE SEX. Is perhaps the very definition of turn off.

    Generally speaking, its a stupid idea.

    In America, couples that marry at 24 years old ,80% will ending in divorce in the first 4 years. This rate is even higher for younger couples, and is lower for older couples. That's way Id say wait till your late twenties early thirties to get married.

    So at what age are you going to get married and finally loss you're virginity? 20, 24 30! I think when someone makes that condition of losing their virginity on their wedding night they push themselves into a marriage at a young age, a marriage that will almost certainly end in divorce.

    Summary

    I don't think you really want to wait till you get married, you are (for good reason) finding boys intimidating at this point in your life, and are using this as a way to avoid this issue. I don't think that's a unhealthy thing to do. But when you do find a nice guy and realise he is honestly interested in you as a person and you start have feeling for him then you will quickly re access your attitude.

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    • I really disagree and not just because I'm a Christian and, therefore, premarital sex is against my beliefs anyways. But it's also because once you have sex with someone a big part of them is with you and vice-versa. And all because the divorce stats are that high for young married couples doesn't mean that a married couple will have that much of a chance for divorce. Also I bet that the ones who have waited will have a low chance of divorce.

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    • And why do you British people always make such generalizations like that?

    • Thats sweet 17. that's the funniest thing I've read today. Thanks for making me laugh. (I assume the irony of your statement was intended.)

  • You have to love someone to marry them

    If you love them you can wait

    Simple

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  • Personally, if I knew a girl that was willing to wait until marriage, I would have a great deal of respect for her & her decision. You don't really hear too many people that say they want to wait these days, so I feel like the 1s that do wait are very special & I would cherish her. :)

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  • I'd never marry someone I hadn't made love to but I certainly wouldn't consider it a turn off.

    Sex will always be a big part of the relationship for me so I'd want to know that we matched sexually before commiting to be with the woman for the rest of my life.

    Sex is a powerful thing and and as such shouldn't be taken lightly imho. Therefor the decision should always be you own and whatever you chose is going to be the right thing to do if you do it responsibly.

    So I think the more important question is this; What do YOU think about guys who do NOT wait. Asking yourself this question might give you some insight into your own motives for choosing whatever you chose. Hence making that choice more informed.

    In short; I do not think it's a good idea in my case due to my beliefs about relationshipd, but I would respect he decision and move on.

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  • It might work for some people. I have some friends that waited until marriage, but I would never be with a girl who was waiting for marriage. If a girl is waiting, I think she is probably putting too much emphasis on sex. For me, sex is a normal part of any relationship. I would want to experience sex and living together before I would ever even consider getting married to someone.

    But hey, if you want to wait till marriage, I think that's great. You should probably hang out at church and find other like minded men. Just don't be surprised when you finally do get married and have sex and realize it isn't that big of a deal.

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  • I don't think its a turn off. If I were really into a girl that belived that, then I would respect her descition. eather way its kool. You should not go and loose ur virginity just because everyones doing it. Take ur time and wait till ur ready.

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  • you got to test drive the car before you buy it chocolate-lover. I don't know if I could marry a girl when I have know idea what she's like in bed. Sex isn't everything don't get me wrong. But it is still a huge factor. I get that its more than sex to you, its something special that only you and your husband will experience together.

    To make up all the sex that the poor fella isn't having, other sexual things could help him until the time does come when you's get married. I don't think I need to spell them out.

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  • Personally I LOVE girls like this. And this is a HUGE reason I am with my gf. We both want to wait until we are married, and I have the utmost respect for her because of it. Girls like that are hard to find, the ones who aren't easily manipulated or driven by "society". It is the biggest turn on in the world!

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  • Learn to dry hump, that isn't considered intercourse and will still keep your virginity in tack. Just make sure he doesn't slip inside you.

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    • It still lustig and if its for religous reasons that wouldn't happen either.

  • I'm a very moral person.

    But I'm not religious

    So the whole Celibacy thing just fundamentally makes less sense to me.

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  • Its a turn off fue to, if were going to sacrifice our erges and time you need to make up that gap. Its only fair. Sex isn't everything but your making us give up something we want alot, while we can get it else where

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  • Think about what she's saying, she's saying "I like you, no really I do and I want to keep you forever"

    If you don't want to be with her forever, then maybe you shouldn't be with her at all.

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  • Thats her descion and I absoultely respect that

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  • some men accept it, some dont.

    you made a lifestyle choice. that's fine. but some people don't like being cornered into another persons choices. if a guy knows that to get you in bed means marrying you, he may not see it as a reward, but a chore.

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  • no not at all I mean that's her choice I respect if somone wants to do that

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  • smart better to know they haven't been f***ed by a guy who could of f***ed 20 other girls and was a frat dude. but that's only if she looks good... I mean if your straight out ugly, why would I care?

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  • i think its a good thing when a girl is waiting for that special someone to give up her virginity but waiting till marriage is kinda a turnoff to me I guess its because I'm 17 and to me marriage just don't sound that great like I would rather just be in a committed relationship because with marrage you have to pay a lot for the ceremony and the rings and stuff and if for some reason something goes wrong and you have to get a divorce you have to shell out more money

    idk I just don't think I should have to pay all this money so my girlfriend knows I love her and I want to be with her forever

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    • Im not a big proponent of marriage my self, but I think you have missed the point of it altogether.

    • Lol I agree with kigirl33 .... marriage isn't about the money, or the fact that you want to please your girlfriend, it's about true love. (kinda sounds corny...oh well)

What Girls Said 6

  • I think, as a 23 year old virgin, that virginity or not wanting to have sex Should not be a turn-off for guys. I've had boyfriends who pushed and pushed for sex, and wouldn't stay with me if I didn't do it. I really have no interest in guys like that. My current boyfriend really doesn't care whether or not we have sex, and he respects me as a person, and I know it's cliche, but it's true. It's really nice, because I'm used to feeling like I have something to make up for by being a virgin. Anyway, we're really happy without having sex, and I think I'll be happy without having sex until the right person and circumstances are in place.

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  • i think some guys don't find it as a turn off but you're probably going end up to get marry at young age. in some sense get divorce at young age too.

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    • Haaahhaaa,,,,

      LOL :D

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    • I guess I saw things different from you because I'm 10 years older then you. I used to think like you when I was your age. I changed my view when I got to college and got to experience so many new things from how I was taught and raised. I realized that marriage was just a piece of paper and doesn't make your relationship better either.

    • Well, its your opinion and I respect it, despite the fact that I totally don't agree with you.

      what would be the difference if I had sex with my boyfriend and after 5 or 6 years he left!!, exactly as if I got married and then divorced after 2 or 3 years.

      if marriage is simply just a piece of paper, I think I would always like to have it with me.

  • The thing is-Americans now are waiting longer than ever to get married. In the 50's most people got married right out of high school,maybe that made it easier to wait. But now many are waiting till their early 30's or untill they've graduated college. Many men, I think ,aren't planning to get married for a long time, and not to be pessimmistic but I think that few exist who would actually wait. I wish there were more men like that. but I guess our culture is just too oversexualized

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  • most guys don't care as long as you do other things.

    but then that would depend on how you define virginity etc.

    but all in all...you really shouldnt be asking questions like this

    online because I'm sure that none of these guys are the ONE lol

    when the right ONE comes along, he won't care and that's all

    that matters babe : )

    keep your values hon,

    take care.

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  • It's not a turn off it just means they want to wait to have kids till they get married they still like you though

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  • usually guys who want girls who are virgin will want girls who are. if guys have had experienced, usually they want experienced. I'm aware I'm a girl, but I've been dumped by a guy who found out I wasn't virgin, it doesn't mean I'm a whore, but he just dumped me.

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