Is marriage the way to go in life?

When I was a kid (and I am from a very traditionalist country) I always thought I'd get married and have kids and what not.

But as I grow up I am noticing that marriage isn't exactly what makes people happy.

For example: The divorce rate in USA is around 50%. The divorce rate in most European countries is around 50%. The only place on earth that doesn't see a high divorce rate is the Middle East but only because they have extremely brutal laws.

[Q] Are people meant to get married? Are we meant to be in monogamous relationships?

I'm not religious, but sometimes I think marriage is just an invention of the church.


0|0
3|5

Most Helpful Girl

  • I think marriage can work. If you marry the right person, it can probably be a wonderful thing, at least for a while. However, sometimes people act too quickly and marry the wrong person, or the person isn't ready to get married and does anyway, or something like that, that's when marriage messes up.

    Biologically, women are supposed to be in monogamous relationships and men are supposed to be polygamous. This doesn't mean that that's the right way to live, though, of course, unless you want to be on a show on TLC. Besides, by this theory at least half of guys wouldn't have any girls at all.

    I also believe that marriage is by no means necessary for a beautiful, good relationship. It has a lot of cultural implications that apparently make the relationship "official", but as we've seen in the modern world marriage doesn't usually reduce a persons' willingness to cheat much. :/

    At the same time, while it is by no means necessary, a lot of good relationships can become even better with marriage, simply by believing that their spouse will be with them for the rest of their lives.

    So, it has its positives and negatives, I guess. :)

    0|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 2

  • Marriage can be and is whatever *you* want it to be. No one has to get married - and no one should feel that they have to. Find what YOU enjoy and what makes YOU happy. I can't say if marriage is an invention of the church or not, but rather a commitment to a life you want to share with someone. I believe we are meant to pair up, but I believe monogamy is more for the heart and soul rather than any other notion.

    0|1
    0|0
  • Many people marry because they feel they are supposed too..

    Or marry the wrong person..

    They marry cause they figure they need to settle down..

    Getting too old..

    Won't find someone better..

    Figure its the next step in the relationship..

    Me, I'm never getting married...

    0|0
    0|0

What Guys Said 5

  • For some people, marriage is the way to go. For other people, single life is preferable. There's no right answer for everybody; you have to do what makes sense for you. Marriage is certainly embraced by religious folks, but I know plenty of atheists and non-religious people who are married. For them, it's the ultimate expression of commitment; plus there are legal and societal benefits to being married. Many volumes have been written on the subject, but the bottom line is that you need to wait until you've met the right person before you get married, and you need to focus on maintaining the relationship, even after you have been together for a long time.

    1|0
    0|0
  • honestly? marriage used to work, but its broken now... if you get divorced, the woman is entitled to bankrupt you, and she can divorce you based off whim, boredom, or even if she's cheating and she feels like being single again.

    human nature is pretty ugly in truth... I wouldn't risk committing, especially to a western woman

    0|1
    1|0
    • I have to somewhat agree because that's what women are encouraged to do everywhere from TV to the bedroom: "Take advantage of the man". A very common phrase is "I'll take you for everything your have"... which really doesn't make sense... unless the woman is heartless/evil or the marriage was a business scam

    • meh well not really man.. once the passion is gone.. the woman looks at television.. movies.. sees easy divorce... passion everywhere... thinks her marriage is broken .. doesn't bother working at it... and decides she's due her man's earned wealth

  • Ye I don't know either. My parents didn't do to well at it, but I see very few couples that are truelly happy together. Either way I think it is the way to go.. life is a bit meaningless without a family to grow old with. And you shouldn't really bring up a child in a broken home. So I would really get married with a woman I want to have babies with, and at the moment it seems like a very far fetched and unlikely situation but who knows, hopefully there is someone out there.

    1|0
    0|0
  • The problem with marriage today is that people use it to fix broken and incompatible relationships. They rush in to it way too fast. Same thing with kids in dysfunctional households. Some idiots thought it would make their relationship stronger if they had a kid, and then are surprised when the opposite happens.

    1|0
    0|1
  • My marriage has not been what I hoped. I still hope to improve it, but ... I don't know.

    Knowing what I know now, I'd be much more hesitant to get married. However, you're pretty much 'in that deep' once you have kids, and having kids is pretty amazing. So I guess I'd wait till I wanted kids, and then take the plunge.

    And maybe I'd judge my potential wife more harshly. Love is not enough. Well ... in some ways it is, but love takes nurturing, and that takes effort. If the effort isn't there, the love will go.

    0|0
    0|0
Loading...