Ok so say you have been with your boyfriend for an adequate time where you fell in love with him. And he loves you too. But the problem is, he's been hurt all of his life by the people who were close to him. So he doesn't want to get married. But he asks you to live with him, as his unofficial wife, just for the time being. How would you feel?
- Forget him! And move onVote A
- Happily go live with him, and hope for the best.Vote B
- Argue with him about it, but wouldn't leave himVote C
- Just want to see resultsVote D
Most Helpful Girl
If I truly loved him, I wouldn't automatically leave him because of that, but I would definitely be wary of the situation. I'm not dead set on getting married, in fact I doubt I ever will, but if a guy wants me to be his "unofficial wife" but isn't willing to be "officially" married, that implies to me that he thinks at some point down the road he is likely to want to leave. If you ever want to ask a girl that, I would be careful how you phrase it.
The thing about marriage, is that it has a greater feeling of permanence. Yeah, I know a lot of people end up divorced anyway, but it's a lot more difficult to get a divorce than it is to just move out, and some people do feel greater incentive to work things out when they are actually married, versus just living together. Regardless of your actual reason for not wanting marriage, it may sound like you are not certain about the relationship's longterm potential.
Obviously not everyone is going to see it that way, but personally if I were in that situation it would be a red flag. I would probably go along with it, but I would proceed with caution.0