Is marriage necessary anymore?

This question was recently polled here in Australia. Majority (60%) answered 'yes'. What do you think? Please provide reasons for your answer.


0|0
13|18

Most Helpful Guy

  • Marriage to show your devotion to someone isn't necessary, nor do I care for the societal ciew of it as being just another step.

    However, it's still beneficial from a legal standpoint as legislation is set up around it. So I you commit a lot of shared resources or belongings, children, etc...then it's helpful. Not required but it follows along an easier path.

    But otherwise, I don't need a marriage to make any kind of message or oath.

    4|1
    1|1

What Guys Said 17

  • I have NO problem with marriage in the spiritual/religious sense, which is what marriage was always intended to be.

    I have BIG problems with marriage in the LEGAL sense, at least as it is handled in the US. Most people who get married don't truly understand what it actually means: you are forming a legal business relationship with another person for life (unless the court decides to allow you to divorce; they CAN say "no" and sometimes do) that carries some privilages and many, many liabilities.

    If you were forming a regular business with another person, and were handed a Business Contract that was essentially a Marriage Contract with a name change, no lawyer in the world would recommend that you sign such a lousy contract! They would point out dozens of ways you would be almost certain to be screwed unless your business partner just randomly happend to be a for-real SAINT with the patience of a pre-school teacher and the ethics of a boy scout. Your lawyer would explain how incredibly unlikely that is, and how it's FAR more likely that you're on a rocket ship to bankruptcy.

    But people sign this contract every day, blissfully unaware of what's going on. Even worse, many do it on a whim, often without discussing important, even vital values and future plans with their spouse, such as:

    - Career Plans?

    - Religion? (conflicts?)

    - Children? How many? How to raise them? Religion?

    - Family? Future parental care?

    - Financial issues? Does one spouse have $100k in debt that they haven't mentioned? Co-signed for your loser brother's credit card 5 years ago? No idea about financial responsibility?

    So, a few years down the road, the couple figures out they made a huge mistake, but now they're in a war, and it's about to get REALLY UGLY.

    My bottom line is: unless you are both sure of the answers to the questions above, AND you both want to have children together, you shouldn't even consider getting married (legally). Almost all rights and privilages can be bestowed legally in a separate action, but without the liabilities.

    2|1
    0|0
    • can we all say PRE-NUP :) I think some kind of prenuptial agreement should be mandatory not just optional before anyone gets married and these prenup's NEED to include the deal breakers i.e is the marriage going to be "open" or not which spouse (if either) will stay home to raise any kids as the stay at home parent etc. I also believe that conflict resolution, fiance planning/saving etc. classes should also be mandatory

    • A pre-nup IS a good idea, but even that is often not enough. Almost half of pre-nups are disputed during divorce, and almost a quarter of them are overturned to some degree or other. A 25% failure rate is hardly a bullet-proof defense. But I still agree that it should be a standard procedure, and I'd also agree to the classes you talk about.

      And I'd add a class that teaches "legal/financial liabilities".

  • Religiously, yes; many who follow a faith system believe that for there to be a certain kind of intimacy (nudge and a wink), then marriage is the way to do it.

    It's not necessary, but technically, neither is art. But, from a financial standpoint, it can help. From a Mental standpoint, it can help. From certain legal standpoints, it can help. In order to raise a child, it certainly helps, provided both partners looking out for a child's well being. Do you NEED to b married to have a kid or raise a happy healthy child? No... but a happy and reasonably happy one can help.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Necessary for what? Happiness? Ofcourse not. However, there is strong evidence that commited, monogamous relationships are necessary for creating and sustaining the large populations needed to maintain first world countries. I don't want to get married, it's just a pointless, ritualistic ceremony. I do want to find a partner, though.

    3|2
    0|0
  • I personally feel Marriage is a dying tradition. A lot of people get married now simply because they had children or so their partner could have benefits. Marriage isn't my kind of thing so my opinion may be a little biased but the divorce rate is insane. You have a better chance of getting a divorce, while at the same time staking your financial security and credit. then you do by staying married for X amount of years. So to answer your question..No.

    1|1
    0|0
  • I don't think it's necessary but I would like one

    I think of it as confirming what you already know, that 'you want to spend the rest of your life together' however cheesy that may be

    I wouldn't think of the relationship as 'official'

    plus the marriage rights and stuff

    1|0
    0|0
  • Me and my friends think the benefits are few, at least in the US it is economically beneficial and the simple act of marrying is a form of exclusivity.

    1|0
    0|0
  • My answer would be yes because I want to start a family with one girl that I love and I would want to live with and be married to that girl. It's kind of like saying this girl is mine and every other girl isn't good enough because I have her.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Depends on how big you make it. I honestly think you can do fine with someone and not get married. there's no actual need for a piece of paper.

    2|1
    0|0
  • I think hollywood has a lot to do with why more and more people feel marriage is not necessary anymore. The most important thing is that marriage is life and it is the biggest commitment that you can ever make. I personally believe that marriage is still necessary and one of my life goals is to get married in the future. I do not believe in hetrosexual de facto relationships, I think they are meant to get married. I have no problem with same sex couples living together.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Of course it's necessary. For the huge bachelor's parties just beforehand ;)

    2|1
    0|0
  • Isn't necessary but call me old-fashioned because I like the idea of having an excuse to throw a party solely to celebrate being with the woman I want to spend my life with.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Marry me! ;-P

    0|0
    0|0
  • I don't think is a necessity to be honest...

    1|1
    0|0
  • No

    1|0
    2|0
  • It isn't that big on a personal level but a lot of laws are in place that allow spousal privileges. You can't testify against a spouse, you can visit them in the hospital, there are legal rights to property, child custody, etc.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Necessary for what? Raise kids? Relationships?

    0|0
    0|0
  • i don't think its necessary. however the way I see it as long as your happy it shouldn't matter what you choose.

    0|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 13

  • It's not necessary but I don't think it's something that will fade out anytime soon, if for no other reasons than social norms. There's not many girls that don't grow up with their dream wedding in mind. And I think there's a mental aspect to it. I've never been married but I had an internship with a guy who got married later in life (he and his wife were both in their 40s) and they had been married about 2 years and some guy visited he hand't seen in awhile and he asked how married life was and he said that it was great, blah blah blah, but he felt like now he felt more connected to his wife in that they really felt the need to work through things and grow together in a way they hadn't before (they'd been dating for like 5 years before that so it wasn't like they just met or anything).

    1|0
    0|0
  • Necessary? It depends.

    From a legal standpoint, God forbid that the man/woman you love is in the hospital, unless you are a "relative" you can't stay with them. You would have ti put up a fight and convince them that you won't leave their side. If you're married, all you have to say "that's my husband/wife" and they will immediately understand.

    People think because you're in a marriage you're more serious because laws have bound you, and some people think God bound you (whatever they believe).

    I don't think marriage is necessary to show that you are devoted to someone, but I think that it shows your faith that you will be together forever, so you're not worried to give up your half of everything.

    For me, marriage is giving up independence and allowing yourself to be considered "one" in the eyes of the world...especially, legal world.

    Honestly, I was thinking about this same thing and I had a discussion about it with someone, but I haven't made up my mind yet.

    1|1
    0|0
  • I've always dreamed to have a small, simple, but beautiful Church wedding with only family and close friends. However, after dating the men in my past and recent history.. I definitely am beginning to think that I would be better off not married. No, it's definitely not necessary - I can take care of myself better than any guy I've met yet in every way (except maybe sex, but hey I don't know what that's like so I don't care lol).

    1|1
    0|0
    • shoot girl you can even take care of yourself for sex too they have a HUGE industry just for that the only thing you can't do without a man involved in SOME way is get pregnant :)

    • lol ha ha so true -- but I'll even pass on the pregnancy .. If I do choose to stay alone for my life, I would have no problem adopting a child who needs a good home. My career would be great to give a kid a good and happy life all by myself! =) see, all planned out lol

  • I start to feel NO because men can't be trusted. Women can't be trusted either lol. Together with someone who makes me unhappy and I end up not shaving my legs anymore cos I don't care? NOOO NO NO.

    oh and I always voted for marrige before, now I am a realist.

    1|1
    0|0
    • Awww...most men aren't to be trusted , but there are some who are! Having that gaurd up keeps out pain, but it can also keep out love :(

    • Id rather live without pain than with.I am not playing the partner lottery anymore. Love doesn't exist. Illusion. Relationships and marrieges are contracts, and people get out of it as muhc as they can grab.

  • I want to get married someday. Of course, like most women just because I want to be loved and have complete commitment from one person.

    However, there are some economical benefits, in America at lease.

    3|0
    1|0
  • It's definitely not necessary (and it never would have been if people hadn't structured society in a way that made it so). But that doesn't mean it can't be beneficial. It just depends on what you want.

    2|1
    0|0
  • It may not be necessary, but I like the idea of it, minus all the expenses lol.

    2|0
    1|0
  • Nope..

    I'm never getting married...

    1|1
    0|0
  • As a divorced 23 year old I say NO! To me marriage is just a piece a paper it cost you more to get divorced than married.

    Marriage is just another title!

    1|1
    0|0
  • wow the fact that you're ven seriously asking this question just goes to show how immensely sleazy this era has become :/ poor next generation!

    0|0
    1|0
    • Why'd you go anonymous, Freetobe?

    • Show All
    • So what about couples who stay together in a committed, long term monogamous relationship as de facto partners but decide not to marry. Any difference?

    • that's when things get very complex. I don't feel I have a right to answer that question seeing as I've never faced the ups and downs of marriage personally.

  • if you re from different countries sometimes the only way to be together is to get married.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Necessary . Necessary for every century, every period.

    1|0
    1|0
  • Marriage is a ripoff. In a divorce, the bitch gets awarded a bunch of money that she didn't even earn

    0|5
    0|0
Loading...