Would you get married if?

I have a great career. I love my work, and am good at what I do. My fiance recently transitioned from one career to another, and is having a difficult time finding work. Regardless of that, he asked me to marry him.

Ladies, and guys, would you marry someone who financially stable/career stable? Would you ask someone to marry you if you weren't financially stable? I love this guy and want to spend the rest of my life with him, but it seems reckless to move forward with a marriage when you might not be able to provide for your family (although my income could more than cover both of us if it needed to).


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Good question. I'm in your situation. I'm beginning to loath being the main one paying for almost everything. It makes me feel like I'm the only one responsible while he's chasing his dreams. When I agreed to his proposal, I wasn't expecting it would take him so long to establish himself in his career and get stable already. So yes, I would prefer to marry someone who is financially secure because it makes life easy for both of us to start a family in future. And no, I wouldn't and I think a guy/girl shouldn't ask someone to marry them unless they can provide for her/him. Thts my opinion.

    On the other hand, my best friend is a doctor and her husband is a househusband. She is the sole breadwinner and they're happy because she doesn't mind bringing in the cash while he cleans and cook. It works if both agree to chip in in some way to make marriage life smoother.

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    • Are you still going through with the wedding even though your guy is still chasing his dreams? I'm having a hard time with this. I almost feel it would be better if we waited. I want my fiance to be happy and to chase his dreams, but I also want someone who is also able to provide for us and for (hopefully) our children. I feel like it is almost too easy for him to continue on a new career, even if it isn't the best choice, because he doesn't have to worry about income coming in or not.

    • I decided he made me wait long enough... We've been engaged for five years and though we have enough from my pay cheque, there's nothing much left for savings which made me doubt his ability to provide for us if we start having children. Plus we have other issues to deal with. We called off our engagement just a few days ago. I'm no longer getting married to this guy but I'm not saying it might not work for you. Talk it out with your fianc? and tell him how you really feel. Share your dreams.

What Guys Said 2

  • I would tell him that you are not ready to make that commitment and see if he can find work and settle in...I would certainly not blame you for not accepting...(:(:(:

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  • "it seems reckless to move forward with a marriage when you might not be able to provide for your family."

    But you say that your income can more than cover both of you. So which is it? Or are you saying it's reckless for him to propose marriage since he can't independently cover both of your expenses? If that's the case then I guess the answer depends on whether you see it as the "man's job" to take care of providing income or whether you view it as both people's jobs.

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What Girls Said 2

  • No. I'd rather he have a job at least-I don't want to be the only one bringing home the bacon.

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  • Personally for me , I don't like the idea of being the only one bringing in the money. What if something happens to me and I can't work for a long while? When I get married I want to make sure both myself and husband are financially stable , because it makes everything smoother and the starting of a family safer.

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