Why is there such a stigma for marrying young?

Hello,

Yes. This is going to be a bit of a rant, but I must know your opinions. I am engaged to the most wonderful man I have ever met. We share identical dreams for lifestyle and our careers coincide with equal demands of travel etc etc. Simply, I couldn't imagine a better match. We've been through really serious problems together, so we know we are strong. I literally can't list how compatible we are, and how stupid it is for us to not marry.

YET, we can't tell anyone but our closest friends of the engagement... as much as we want too... because of the critiques we will get on our relationship that will do more harm then good.

Do you have any advice? Have you been through this? Should we tell our parents?

Thank you :)

Last time I heard, hearing our grandparents falling in love and marrying young is a beautiful thing. Why can't it be the same today..?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Honestly, I don't see why people feel the need to marry young. Like the previous comment said, our life expectancy has increased so there's no rush. And since the divorce rate is so high nowadays, I don't understand why waiting would be so bad. Make sure indefinitely, after all the lust and honeymoon phase has settled, then see how smoothly and well the relationship goes. For me personally, I want to get married ONCE and that's all. And seeing how that's a hard thing nowadays, I don't plan to rush into marriage. I would not consider marrying anyone unless we've at least been dating for 3 years. I feel like people romanticize marriage to the point of illusion. Marriage is f***ing hard work, it's not an accessory like so many celebs make it out to be. I feel like people my age, don't understand the weight of that commitment. Therefore I say, just wait, what's the rush?

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What Guys Said 3

  • Young people were a lot more mature generations ago on the whole. The boys worked at businesses or trades for years and the girls played primary roles in raising their younger siblings. This is not to say that every young person is immature but most have had many fewer life experiences than their grandparents had by that age.

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  • It's probably because people think "Wow, they're so young! Do they really even know each other or themselves really well? Do they have their Master's Degrees? And their doctorates? Are they millionaires yet?" There's just a concern about your readiness, especially now with the divorce rate being what it is.

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  • feminism

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What Girls Said 7

  • A lot of my friends got married young (17, 18, 18, 21, and 20) and I'm 19 and I'm no where near mature enough to get married. I am not mature enough to handle the difficulties that comes with married life. No matter how great you two think you are together, marriage is difficult to keep strong.

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  • It's not a question about your maturity but it's a big step to take and there's the huge financial obligation that comes with marriage. Are you both able to deal with it, when sh*t hits the fan?

    Are you both trying to elope? I think you should... considering you'll make them upset for some time, if you don't

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  • Young people today are a lot more immature and have unrealistic views and expectations of marriage.

    Young people today rush into relationships and marriage and think only of the short term--not the long term

    Marriage today is NOT the same as it was years ago because we are in different times with more opportunities and chances and are not expected to live the same lifestyle

    I don't know. I just think its a bad decision to marry young. People need to make sure they're financially and emotionally stable. They need to wait until they're grown...

    That's just my take

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  • becasue people think they are immature and will change their mind. well tell your parents but say you will wait sometime or compromise on something.

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  • Because now with more the 50% of marriages ending in divorce (grandparents had to deal with more social stigma about divorce), it seems that you want to be mature enough to make this life long decision. If you look at it in another way our brains don't fully develop till age 25+ so one could argue that there is still growing up to do.

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  • Because times have changed. Back then, people only lived like 30 years

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  • becasue now we can really experience and have fun, it is old school to marry young

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