Do you believe it is wrong for a couple to live together before marriage?

Are you the type of person who believes a couple should not share the same roof until they are married?

  • Yes I believe it is wrong
    27% (11)15% (5)22% (16)Vote
  • No I don't believe it is wrong
    73% (30)85% (28)78% (58)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I believe its wrong because statistically when you do live together before marriage when or if you get married it is more likely to fail. I know it seems counter intuitive but I think when you play house before you are married, it takes away the spark and it takes away the whole purpose of being married. I am not opposed to it for religious reasons, but simply for legal and financial reasons things get really sticky when you are just living together and have a fight and the lease is in one person's name... I don't know it just seems like a lot of commitment and risk for someone you aren't sure you love or you aren't sure they love you. I would rather have a roommate that is just a person to split bills with than a boyfriend or even a friend because emotions and finances when mixed together are just a recipe for disaster. Which is why you also shouldn't go into business with your family members, but even family members you are bound to forever through blood, and that is complicated so I can only imagine something as temperamental as living with your boo. :/

    I guess, thinking it's "Wrong" is a poor choice of words I just don't think it is wise or really advantageous.

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    • I think that whole people are more likely to get a divorce thing though is more likely because people who move in together don't really hold any meaning to "till death" thing, because its obviously not a religious implementation for them so its a moral thing as opposed to a scientific thing

    • Exactly.

What Girls Said 18

  • No, I don't think it's wrong. Living together is the ultimate test of compatibility. Once you're married, you'll have to live together forever and a divorce is a much longer process than simply breaking up. So I think it's good to try it before marriage. People may realize they aren't right for each other or they could realize that they are. It has the potential to make or break a relationship.

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  • No, I think its clever. I understand that people would want to save it for marriage, but I think it's more practical to ensure you can live harmoniously together before biting the bullet and getting married.

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  • I voted A just because if you do that you'll probably also be having sex before marriage which I think is wrong. But if you could live together without doing that then I guess it could be ok.

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  • I think it would be crazy not to live together before marriage! That's a huge change and it could even change the relationship, so I personally think it should be done before going through with the big decision of marriage.

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  • I'd never dream of marrying someone until I have lived with them. It's the only way to really get to know someone and some people just can't live together.

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  • No, in fact, I think it's a great thing to do.

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  • No as long as they are comitted

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  • no.

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  • morally,no.

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  • It's. not the best thing to do, but many people in our society do it anyway. However , if you are considering it I would advise you not to especially if your not looking to get married to the person.

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  • i think it's a littel bit wrong I belive if you do every thing befor the marrige you will not injoy the life after the marrige you should maby leave something after the marrige like living togather ! if yuou understand my point !

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  • I don't think it's wrong

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  • For ME, yes it's wrong. I'm a practicing Catholic.

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  • No

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  • No, I don't think it's morally wrong at all. I've read that couples who do generally have a higher divorce rate though.

    It seemed counter-intuitive to me, since you'd think living with someone and getting to know them would be like a trial period for the real thing, to see if it'd work out, but for some reason in practice it can increase the likelihood of divorce rather than decrease it.

    They call it the "cohabitation effect". Apparently, they think the main issue is that people "slide" into marriages rather than really make the decision based on feeling truly ready to take that step. There have been some interesting articles and studies on it: link link

    Most say it doesn't mean you shouldn't do it though, you just have to be careful and go about it the right way. Have your eyes wide open.

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  • no, I think its better because you get to know how its going to be like if you do get married.

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  • i don't believe it is wrong

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  • Not at all

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What Guys Said 12

  • In my opinion, practically it might be right, but morally its certainly wrong. I mean...a couple living together are almost certain to have sex. If they can stay together and abstain from sex until marriage, then its not really wrong. I know very well that in this age, most people have sex with multiple partners before marriage, and I'm probably gonna get blasted my everyone here because they'll feel I'm having stone-age thinking. But just look at it this way. If you have sex before marriage, then it will become a routine, and there will be nothing new for you to explore sexually after marriage. Hence, there is a high probability that your marriage might crumble very soon. Also, I personally consider sex as the ultimate expression of love, and it should be done only with the person you're sure of spending the rest of your life with. Of course, marriage is no guarantee of living with that person forever (because people get divorced often), but it offers a level of security higher than a relationship, because getting a divorce is not as easy as just breaking up from a relationship.

    P.S. I'm a 27 year old man who's a virgin, and I'm saving myself for that special woman with whom I'll be spending the rest of my life. And mighty proud about that decision.

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    • How exactly does not having sex before marriage prevent it from becoming routine afterwards?

    • I'm not saying that. What I mean is, if you routinely have sex before marriage, then by the time you're ready to marry, the spark would likely be gone. Even after marriage sex may become routine and boring, but there is the strong bond of marriage to keep the couple going. I myself have observed people who refrain from sex before marriage, actually have much happier and satisfied married lives than the others.

  • I think it's a really good think a couple could do so they can experience what it would be like to live together if they were married. Because maybe they won't like the way things work when living in the same house, and they can end their relationship without having to go through marriage and then divorce. It's much easier to end things before marriage.

    Living together before marriage is a great way to find out if you will enjoy living together when you are married.

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  • it's the best way to know if you can handle seeing her every day and living with her for the rest of your life.

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  • The opposite, actually - I think it's a really good idea, bit like a trial run. There's a massive difference between living with someone 24/7 and just staying over a couple of nights a week, so moving in together and making sure you're compatiable before tying the knot makes sense.

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  • test drive...

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  • Nowadays as I see frequently, couples fight over so much bullsh*t. and most of the time fights end up with break ups for some days and they get back together again. when these couples get married there is no chance to break up couse now you are married. and the only thing to do is to get divorced. if couples share a house before marriage they can learn to make things straight between themselves without having to break up(get divorced) afterward. I its pretty right and healthy. I am not even talking about two people loving each other sharing a bed. by the way sharing a house doesn't mean having sex. but I don't see any problem there either.

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  • If anything I think it's the other way around. It's probably better to live together for a while to make sure you're comfortable being around the person so much.

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  • Personally, I do not endorse living together before marriage. People who are a "couple" shack up all the time so it is common. Does not make it right.

    Though if you are engaged and move in prior to the wedding to save money and someone's lease is up, that is a little better to deal with. I am just very old school is all.

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  • Depends what you mean by "Wrong". If you're asking if it's amoral then 'no'. If you're asking if it's bad for the marriage, then yes, since cohabitation before marriage time and time again has been proven to somehow increase divorces. We know there is a pattern but it's still debated as to why that pattern exists.

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    • Really? It has? That's so fascinating!

    • Show All
    • I think that whole people are more likely to get a divorce thing though is more likely because people who move in together don't really hold any meaning to "till death" thing, because its obviously not a religious implementation for them so its a moral thing as opposed to a scientific thing

      meaning that its because people who "shack up" don't have the high "moral standing" that others who don't do not saying they have less but just as a whole they aren't really conservative or whatever

    • Well I always thought it was just due to the fact that humans are serial monogamous creatures. Living together before marriage begins the timer that every couple really has but if you marry at the beginning of that timer social pressures exist that would extend or discourage absolution of the relationshop.

  • I think it's okay. One of my friend's parents aren't married, but they live together and have had one child

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  • Whoever does is more likely to get divorced.

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  • no reason why it's wrong

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