Open marriage: Would you do it ?

I truly think that there is a HUGE distinction between love and sex. I've had sex with a lot of people, loved none of them except maybe a few in different ways but none were "true love."

If I had a husband I think I'd want an open marriage - he's with me for love/stability and with others to play and I would have the same opportunities as long as it was just here and there and not a constant sort of thing...

What do you think? I think it's more realistic that way - think of how many marriages wouldn't end in divorce and the countless others wouldn't be ruined when the scorned partner didn't leave.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I understand that you view things from a different perspective, that's okay.

    However, most people (including) me don't see a distinction between love and sex. They are intertwine and are both very important to work together and to keep a relationship alive. Marriages are about two people being committed to each other, in love and sex, for life (hopefully). If you want open relationships, find someone else that does. Otherwise, most guys would be VERY offended that you are totally cool with having sex with other men with a commitment like that.

    Also, I've heard of people trying to have an open relationship and it failing almost every time. Eventually someone gets hurt or just doesn't feel the "love" aspect.

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What Guys Said 7

  • no, why the hell would I put a ring on it if she's not mine and I hers? sure I agree I can have sex with multiple women and not feel attachment like that but marriage to me is a vow saying that your devoting yourself to your partner fully why would I want her getting pounded by some other dude?

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  • If both of e spouses were both getting laid equally as much, and were both completely OK with it and were OK with having no boundaries, than there is a slight chance. However, I doubt this ever happens. The woman starts getting more than the guy and he gets jealous. It doesn't work. The guy isn't comfortable with her doing specific things with otheruys and she does them. Doesn't work.

    There are just too many variables. Besides, when you meet someone you want to commit to you definitely won't want this

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  • The way I see it, an open marriage isn't a marriage. Why even bother getting married in the first place?

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  • It can sometimes work and I know people who've done it,but it's rare.

    More often,it will cause problems.

    Find someone you can love and find out what real sex is all about.It doesn't get boring.It just gets better,if you really love that person and he loves you.

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  • This just doesn't make any sense. You think this would lower divorce rates? Have you ever heard of jealousy? From a parental stand point it would be a disaster. Not to mention a common health risk, and a vast financial drain when your man gets some random whore knocked up. It may seem "fun" until reality hits you. You define love and sex as two different things and that is true but I don't see how you can claim to love each other while using others for sex at your own discretion.

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  • Depending on the situation, I wouldn't rule it out.

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  • Yeah totally. Keeps things hot and fun.

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What Girls Said 10

  • No, I definitely would not. I personally feel that one of the major points of marriage is to show another person love and commitment by being faithful. Open marriage, in contrast, seems to be about avoiding commitment. Sure, you and your future-husband could come up with and agree on a system of rules for cheating, but wouldn’t the emotional nature of love eventually get in the way? Wouldn't you get jealous or start to resent him? What happens if one person wants to stop, but the other doesn't?

    I'd be totally disgusted if my husband came home late from another girl's house and tried to touch me.

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  • I don't feel like a marriage should be open. An open relationship is different. But once you venture into marriage l felt like you've decided to commit to that one person. That means you've chosen them and only them. Open relationships are less final. I just feel like if you've gone as far as to get married then you should be done with all the "open" feelings. Otherwise why not just stay in an open relationship.

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  • i don't think people are meant to be with one person., people marry for security. the romantic love dies down over time till you're just good friends. open marriage if you must marry , imo.

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  • No, I believe a marriage is a sacred bond between 2 people and that there are things you share with this person and this person only when you're married, sex is one of them. Also, I couldn't just have sex with someone, I have no interest in that.

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  • If I wanted something open then I wouldn't get married and just stay in an open relationship. It kind of ruins the whole point of marriage for me tbh.

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  • Them what's the point of getting married?

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  • I have been in an open relationship for 18 years and I love it. Not right for everyone. So you must decide for yourself if it is right for you and your partner

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  • Hell no! I'm so in love with my husband just the thought of anybody putting their hands on me but him makes me sick!

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  • No I wouldn't. Open marriages are stupid.

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  • Uh, no. Marriage means monogamy. If I didn't want monogamy, I wouldn't get married.

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