I am in a serious relationship and I'm young. I'm 16, he's 18. We have "explored" each other but were both planning on waiting till marriage to have sex. We talk about marrying each other often now which is weird but I like it because I want to spend the rest of my life with him. But I'm sooo young and so is he. we wouldn't actually get married till I turn 18 because I want to graduate high school and begin college.

so basically I'm asking do soul mates or true love exist?

is it normal to be in love and ready to settle down before I'm out of high school?

should I be scared of him just wanting to marry him for sex?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I would slow down. You don't need to marry someone to let them know you love them. I would just stay in the relationship and at least hold off on marriage for a couple years. Basically "see" what it would be like to be married. What I mean is if you can handle spending 3 + years with him then you should be able to handle marriage. Especially in the prime of your life. You're young and a lot is going to change in the next couple years. I am only saying this because you are 16. I'm not saying you don't love him, just wait for marriage there are other ways to say you love him. If you both are faithful and trust each other there should be no problem waiting a couple years. Use promise rings if you have to satisfy that marriage feeling.

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What Guys Said 2

  • so basically I'm asking do soul mates or true love exist?

    True love exists. SoulmateS exist. Please note the plural form. Please also be aware there are a lot of romantic notions around this "soulmate idea", the truth is that they may be unpleasant news, in that they come with some "big lessons" that you need to learn. In my opinion, it is far better than to specify what you want by answering "What do I want with a guy ?", and then focus on your answers until he shows up.

    is it normal to be in love and ready to settle down before I'm out of high school?

    To me, whether the majority of people are doing something (normal/not normal) is not important. It is your life that you are living, not the majority's. I would ask, "Is it wise to ...". To that question, I would answer "No". e.g. Do each of you know what your life purposes are at this point in life ? Do each of you know where your career path lie ? There are so many important subjects that haven't even surface at both of your age. Guess what is going happen when they surface (e.g. life purposes) and yours don't match ?

    should I be scared of him just wanting to marry him for sex?

    Yes. There is nothing wrong with sex, human beings would be extinct a long time ago without the sex urge. But love is a lot more than that just sex. And life is waiting for both of you outside the bedroom. You don't spend your entire life in the bedroom.

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  • You would be really surprised how much people can change from when they are 16 to when they are in their early twenties. What's the rush? You both are very young and just enjoy being with each other for now and see how life plays out. Getting married so you can justify having sex with them is not a good reason for getting married.

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What Girls Said 2

  • i don't think you should get married that early in life...yes right now you love him very much and feel like you want to spend the rest of your life with him but you never know what might happen. why do you need marriage to keep you guys together? if you guys are only doing this for the sex, totally don't even think about it.

    also marriage is a type of commitment between you two to hopefully last forever. do you guys have a steady career/income? do you guys know what you want in life and how you're gonna get it? do you guys know what you are getting yourselves into? these are the questions you have to think about because things like money play a huge factor in people's relationships and if you were to stay together that problem WILL come up and can definitely affect your relationship for the worse. you can wait.

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  • I really don't think that you should get married that young. People change so much before they turn 25. I was so in love with a guy when I was 16 and thought about marriage, but I am glad I didn't as we wouldn't have been right for each other. If you are meant to be together then you will stay together for the long haul. Men are hard wired to want sex, I would be concerned that he'd marry just for sex. I am not trying to get you to go against your values, but if you really love each other and want to have sex, Id consider it before marriage.

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