I am dating a Muslim man and have been since before December he's also married but says he wants to make me his second wife. How do I believe this?

He says some things need to be done first but I haven't asked him what. I am confused.

Updates:
Yes his wife knows about me.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • 1. It depends on which country you are in i. e. the country's laws need to allow polygamy
    2. The Shariat law which Islam follows allows multiple marriages but what the Shariat allows is for bonafide & legitimate reasons but people use it anyway to marry multiple times :)
    3. If he says he wants to marry you and make you a second wife, he probably means it cause his religion & laws of the religion allow it
    4. Ask him 'what' first too :)

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    • agree, people nowadays marry again out of lust, not due to legitimate reasons as you said.

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    • Pretty decent opinion Raj.

    • Thank you @AshBrown for reading through and your kind words :) what you say is very justified too :)

What Guys Said 7

  • This makes me wonder why polygamy is illegal in so many places. I don't want a polygamous relationship myself, but why are we enforcing how other people handle their own relationships?

    In my opinion, being in a polygamous relationship should be up to the person, not the government.

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    • I know but it would be harder to be in a polygamous relationship if both people don't share the same beliefs.

    • Did you mean to reply to my reply on your question?

      I get what you mean, though that would happen with any relationship whether it's polygamous or not.

  • I mean WOW, your second wife? I can't believe a guy would or could have enough nerve to say such a thing to a woman.

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    • I mean... WOW his 2nd wife

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    • Ha, like you said I need an edit...

      What if I had 9 other guy friends who were with me, like in a van,...

    • LOL!!! Not again...

      What if I had 9 other guy friends who had many wives like me and went with me, like in a van,...

  • Get out while you still can; you will regret it I promise you.

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  • Is it possible for you to meet with his wife and him under the same roof and have a serious discusion?

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  • Are you that fucking Stupid? Leave him. He will never love you.

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  • what in the fuck. leave him, you noob.

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  • What if he wants another wife or two?

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    • in the uk polygamy is ilegal, however the exception is if you marry outside the uk and immigrant you can get on benefits allowance for the whole family. imams frequently have that here. 1 "legal" wife by law, 3 other "wifes" in the mosque

What Girls Said 12

  • You can do that if you live in Canada or the U. S. It might be legal in other countries - I'm not sure.

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    • I can or can't in Canada

    • that was a typing error. I meant to say you can't have more than one wife in the U. S. or in Canada .

    • At least not yet you can't

  • You're crazy for getting involved with a married man. A Muslim man can marry again but only for a valid reason

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    • This exactly. I don't know why a woman would put herself in such position. You deserve better, QA.

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    • ... at least where I live.

    • happens here too

  • Does his wife know about this? She will have to agree to it as well... I was brought up in a Muslim household and it is very rare for a Muslim man to take on a second wife... something about this doesn't seem right... he very well could be stringing you along

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  • If I'm right. You are from one of those Islamic countries where more than one wife is allowed? If not... I think he is just bullshitting you.

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  • Muslim men can marry more than one woman If you're not Muslim, why would you want to be his second wife?

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    • You don't have to be a Muslim to want a polygamous relationship.

  • what are you confused about. polygamy must be legal wherever he's from. he's inviting you to be wife #2. if you dont dig it you best break it off.

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  • The only way this is possible is if one of his wives is married to him under Islam in a mosque and his other wife is married to him under legal documents.

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  • where do you live? polygamy is not legal in many countries.

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  • why do i feel like you are trolling.

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  • A muslim man can marry 4 women, Im a muslim. But would never marry a man that is married, let him get a devours or dont go for it

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  • If you want to be involved in a polygamous relationship, then go for it.
    If you're NOT interested in that, stop dating taken men.

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  • I mean, I would never consider myself of being a sideline, so that will not even take place in my book of marriage.

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    • I think his 2nd wife is a sideline and she's it. Until there's a 3rd, I reckon. The first wife does retain some harem supervisor rights as a consolation prize, I suppose.

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