I am a fat, balding, middle-aged lonely white-guy (that's heavily in debt), should I:

a) kill myself

b) suck it up and learn to enjoy my two best friends; my dog and my computer.

c) pretend to have feelings for others (when I don't).

d) go to that website for Thai girls and order me an Asian hottie?

e) none of the above

f) other

Thanks to all of you who were generous enough to respond. You all made good points. Being alone and isolated can be a bitch but it's not insurmountable. I hope you all go on to find happiness and endless fulfillment in the relationships you choose.

What's Your Opinion?


What Girls Said 32

What Guys Said 26

  • Selected as most helpful

    well, what you could do is get on your computer, download some upbeat music, upload it to an MP3 player, and take your dog for a nice walk at least three days out of the week for half an hour. That'll help you lose weight, if that's bothering you.

    balding has two options: just shave it all off and pull off that bald look (which can be very sexy) or you can buy some rogaine and grow some of it back.

    idk if you're working or not, but maybe you can get a weekend job or sell some unwanted stuff around your house on Amazon, eBay or half.com. you'll earn some extra cash that way (by the way, we're all heavily in debt my friend, so you don't stand alone lol).

    last but not least, feel a little better about yourself. go get a hobby of some sort. try to write or read. go volunteer at an elderly home or a shelter. get to know some people who are volunteering and people who need help. go to church on sundays or at least try and find a place where you can seek solace (I like sitting at the pier or going to the library). don't be so hard on yourself.

    • By the way, suicide is never the answer to anything. nobody wants you to go like that and you shouldn't choose to live or die. let life happen and deal with it as it comes. when life gives you lemons, you don't make suicide threats, you trade them for limes and make mojitos!

  • If you are balding, then you should take vitamins for hair growth.

    I heard about Reloxe is good for hair thinning. My friend used it and had given him a great results.

    Maybe you can try that.

  • Im sure there are women that will like you, but you probably don't like middle age and fat women.

  • order an asian hottie =D

    --or just put yourself out there and find someone

  • Fat, balding, middle aged...even in tons of debt, you'd be amazed how much of this is a none issue for you not having a woman. Both sexes appreciate the other sex keeping in somewhat of a decent shape, both NONE of the things that you listed are reasons for not having a woman. Even with out your woes, you lack confidence, which is the sexist thing on a man.

    1. You don't like being "fat"? Join an exercise group and get out the house. Buy P90X and get off the couch. Do something about it. If I'm doing it, you could be doing it too. Work out before you go to work. You might find that exercise will improve your mood A LOT!

    2. Balding? Hey, a lot of chicks dig that and a lot don't. Find someone who is going to love you for you. If you're holding on to the sides...shave it off. It will look better. You may not have money for Bosley but I've heard that rubbing virgin coconut oil on your head will stimulate growth...I'm not sure how it works but its worth a try. I use it for nice, soft silky hair. Have heard of someone growing their hair back using it. A little goes a long way.

    3. Middle aged? Oh please! Do you know how many women are out there waiting for you? I know of a 41 year old man who could have me now if our situation was practical.

    4. If money can't make you happy, why does it make you this sad? I understand you because I have to pay back student loans and I'm working down 2 credit cards that helped me get into school AND I'm still in school. Looking back, we live we learn.

    5. This is life and you only have one. Be confident, content, and assured with yourself because there is plenty of women who share 1 or more issues that you have. You may have a extra pounds ( you CAN lose weight!), balding, middle aged, broke and lonely guy but I assure you that no woman wants a man who is down from these things and lacks confidence. Confidence and the acceptance of one's self is incredibly sexy.

  • B. feel good to your self.

  • B. Then read 'Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway' by Susan Jeffers.

  • Anything that will make you feel better, do it.

  • Make the best of what you have, one day a woman is going to fall for you and not give a damn about what you look like and what kind of financial problems you have! Get yourself out there!

  • well ur negatve and we have enough people likee tht in the world so I say a...JK JK JK JK JK JK

    E! none of those things will help!

  • You should do f) other...get outta the house and try to break out of your shell! You can't meet anybody if your stuck at home all the time on the computer! Go out, make friends, let them set you up with people. OR go on a dating site and see if you can find someone that way.

  • I think D sounds like the most fun :P

  • i have an issue when white guys look down on Asian girls like this. Even though I'm half Asian, I think it's just horrible how some guys go back to countries like Thailand and do whatever they want to do because the government is so irresponsible there and encourages prostitution. those are some big issues-immoral and looks bad on both parties/ groups of people

    and as for your choices, I'm sure there are better ways to spend your time.

    • For those of us who are humor impaired, I think he was making a light hearted reference to the existence of "mail order brides." they exist. seriously. and it totally isn't this guys fault. stop taking things so seriously just because you have asian ancestry. he wasn't "looking down" on all asians. and before you come back and say I must be a genocidal lunatic, I'll have you know I love most foreign cultures. you must dislike a lot of comedians

    • QA - You said you were a fat, balding middle aged man that's heavily in debt then asked if you should find yourself a thai girl. Why a Thai girl? Why not a girl near you? The way you phrased everything was derogatory towards Asian girls. Think about it.

    • That I "look down" on Asian girls or have anything whatsoever to do with any form of prostitution.

    • Show Older
  • None of the above.

    Just think you're in the typical American movie and get yourself a makeover, it's really not that hard, just diificult to really get up and do it:

    Start working out. The endorphins will make you happier, so you won't feel that depressed anyway. You will start to look better. Because you will start to look better you will start to take better care of yourself and pay more attention to your reflection if you look in the mirror.

    OK, so what you've accomplished now is that you look better--that means you will get more female attention. Maybe you'll meet someone.

    Not guaranteed off course, but you definitly will get more attention (which will make you AGAIN, happier). You will start to feel better about yourself.

    You will have more courage to do sit down and think of a solution for your financial issues.

    And so on.

    Seriously: all you need to do is get up and start to work out.

    I know it sucks in the beginning, especially when you're fat, but reallyreally try to think about how many carbs you burn with every move you make. And how happy you're making your body! (I know I sound dumb but just... you know: try to believe in it!)

    You will start to feel the difference and be happier in a week or so, just go for it, really.

    I was pretty fat too but most of the time I just thought: f*** it, I like pizza and brownies too much. But then, one day, my sister dragged me to the gym and I discovered working out actually CAN help. It's pretty amazing.

    I feel much better now, seriously.

    Just get out of bed one day and think: I'm going to take controll (actually doing something is not as bad as it seems) and make my mom proud!

    Just try to surprise the world. Nothing can beat that glorious feeling.

    • Wow that is great advice ennelaaajs lol nice name btw

  • go to church and find god. he will help you with all your problems ;)

    • Or just try reading some spiritual or inspirational books. if you feel like a loser that's what you are going to be. if you feel good about yourself you will be a winner in your eyes and that's what really matters.

    • This is very true

  • 1. get a lover

    2.get another pet

    3. travel

    4. take a vacation

    5. take up a sport

    6. vist someone you love

    7.get a new style

    8.suck it up

    9.wright reasons on why you like ur life

    10. go to church

  • ...I really had a bad day and you made me smile, honestly : )...Be more confident about yourself thank god there aren't only shallow people in the world...accept yourself and you ll see other people will accept you too...Its that difficult!


  • D!

  • Agree with Ceesa

  • Find faith!

  • it is hard to be social but some times you just gotta do something differant wen you are not happy with how things are

    and if you want a asian hottie haha go for it

    just make sure unoe what you are getting in to

    i noe a guy who did tat and his mail ordar bride turned out to be a total bitch

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  • send me your email adress please on nicholaswambugu@ymail.com

  • First of all Don't Kill Yourself! Seriously, if your harboring those kind of thoughts you should be getting some therapy if you can afford it as apposed to being on here.

    as far as balding... just shave your head, think Jason Statham.

    as far as fat... fill your fridge up with fresh white meats and leafy greens then hit the gym.

    as far as debt... pick up some books on debt and read read read. Then address the smallest liability first.

    as far as middle aged... We all get old eventually. live with it.

    Don't give up bud, get yourself together and get out there, you'll find someone.

  • a) does not solve any of those problems

    b) don't you already enjoy them? This is nice option!

    c) no one pays you for acting unless you are professional actor

    d) damn good idea! Works together with plan b)

    e) if there is any better plan f)

  • 1. Shave your head.

    2. Hit the gym

    3. Hardest one of all. Start being Social!

  • 1.

    plug off your computer, cut your nternet provider


    Get a life.

  • Dude, you need to be happy with yourself aight? If it's that big of a deal that you're overweight, go on a diet and start working out. Baldness is hardly a life-ending, bad thing. Some ladies view baldness as sexy ;P.Once you're good with yourself (a state of mind, not necessarily physical appearance), go on Eharmony or something man. There's still that special someone out there waiting for you. The dept thing sucks, but you'll get over it. Really what is, logically, the worst thing that could happen? Declare bankruptcy, and start over. Yeah it would suck sweaty ass, but still not as bad as death. You still have probably double your life ahead of you, if not more. Don't stress it. Good luck man.

  • wow too negative try to loosen up and enjoy the small things in life. such as the movie zombieland [the guys twinkies was the small enjoyment]

  • work out a lot, it releases happy juice into your system. (only half joking, it is basically happy juice)

  • Other people said this, but I want to restate that God can give even the most pitiful people comfort. Even if your current life is in bad shape, by belief in an afterlife you can make yourself feel safe and protected. If you can't rise to the challenges of life, retreating to God is always an option.

  • wow , I suggest you get off of here and turn your life around.

  • make changes in your life, like exercising; not to be muscly necessarily, but just to be average weight; you'll look better and feel better (endorphins, etc.).

  • G) stop spending so much f***in time on a computer, start to workout, loose the weight, get hair products... go out and get girls... don't be a little bitch please...

  • Hit the gym, realise that in biological terms a balding male is a sign of "hey look I survived this long, ain't I virile?" or something, middle-aged isn't bad, most women don't like baby-faces and hey, we're all lonely sometimes.

    I agree though with the working out sentiment.

    It doesn't have to be anything drastic if you don't want it, but find a routine where you can sweat a little and start losing weight.

    Once you got the weight down and feel and look fitter you'll be much happier and the rest can be dealt with because those are universal and hard to change (except the debt).

    Never think weight is something you can't lose, you weren't born fat, and its doubtful your weight is genetic (the massive rise in obesity is far too rapid to be explained away as hereditary...).

    Stick in there mate, just remember how many people are in your position to, and think of how you'll feel knowing your one of the few that proactively made a decision to change.

  • f) Other

    You have everything you need to re-invent yourself. Stop feeling sorry for yourself, get off your ass and DO something that will change things. Shave your head, get on a diet, go to the gym and in 5 years your whole life will be different.

    Keep the dog. :-)

    Good Luck,


  • LMFAO!

    ignore me, but id probably kill myself.

  • Suck it up, and get an Asian hottie

    enjoy your life man. We don't all get what we want out of life but enjoy what youve got because most people have it much worse. such as the asian hotties who are sold to westen men online.

    live life as full as you can iththe resource you have available

  • B,C, and D are a must. Others may include the mafia, Government, or Ponzi schemes.

  • If I were you I would choose D. Nothing wrong with a mail order bride, she may not speak English but who the hell cares wouldn't you rather her bitch at you in Thai than in English? All you have to do is shrug your shoulders or nod and then drink a beer and eventually she'll shut up. But then again there's one problem your heavily in debt so how you going to pay for her?

  • One more thing most people who reply to this are just giving you BS. They are telling you what the socially acceptable thing to say to someone in this situation is, which, unfortunately is not always the right thing to say.

    I'm guessing you want some real answers, so I'll give it to straight with not sugar coating or crap just to make you feel better [for 2 minutes] and male sure you won't hurt anyone else.

    Here it is:

    1) Try all this stuff, something might work.

    2) See if you can come up with a few other ideas, try them

    3) Set a time limit for yourself, the truth is everyone dies, so there is no reason to kill yourself, you've got your whole life to work out different plans and give them a shot but if after a certain period of time you don't think you're having any luck, the truth is you might never. If you can't stand going through life with not possibility to improve your situation, end it. Why not? It's your life. It's your choice.

  • Well on the bright side, you're white; so whatever you choose to do no one will think you're strange for doing it, and you have the freedom to express yourself however you see fit without being punished socially.

    Except maybe rapping.

    All the more reason I think you should start. Become a Fat, balding, middle-aged lonely white-guy rapper and make songs about asian girls online- - if your work is good and you can get it out there you might just find an untapped market to exploit. You could make millions, and change at least some things!

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