Most Helpful Guy
I didn't convert. I was found. "Stand back, let me handle this!" was whispered into my ear. I long for that relief to wash over me again; but suspect I might have to wait, and accept that I'm not abandoned, no matter how much it feels that way at times.
No, I wouldn't convert before death. I'd stay where I'm at now, because otherwise, I feel I never truly lived. It's not so much death I fear, as dying - with the realization of having lived a meaningless life.0