What do you think about this essay?

(By the way, the object is a cell phone, but I don't know what else to add i am thinking about finishing up with a sentence that says what object it is but I don't know which one would sound nice. So tell me how it sounds and if i need to change or add something.) Personal diary of an object

"In my short existence, i’ve experienced a lot of difficulties. One of my difficulties is the fact that many of my owners don't take care of me as they should. Maybe i am just a simple “thing” for them, but i am much more. I let them communicate with each other, i entertain some teens, and sometimes i am even their cupid! I really don’t know what makes them think i am a simple “thing”. Not only that , but sometimes my owners leave me at home and i just stay there, doing nothing.

Today, i have more than 1,000,000,000 family members. We don't see each other, until our owners compare us, and see which one is the reasonable or who is the fancy one. When I go with my owner for a walk, i can smell the angelic smell of spring, and summer almost coming! I get excited about the summer, because when it’s winter, i get too cold even though my owner sometimes settles me in a warm place, in his back pocket! Now let me describe in a clear way the fact that i am almost everytime in their back pocket. Their back pocket sometimes has odors that no one would like to smell. Whenever my owner’s vapors come out, i pass out. The next thing you know is that my owner thinks i am dead and need energy. My owner gives me my delicious food, even though i fainted because of his gas!

I wish many people would enjoy my company. I make them have mixed feelings, and that is not one of my purposes. Sometimes, i make them cry, because they just look at me and start crying, like if i reminded them of something or someone. I try to sing to them their favorite songs, but i think that makes my owners feel worse. When they are mad with someone they just push me to the floor or to their bed, therefore i get scratches and bruises all over my body. When they are happy they give me my food at my times, they even dress me up with colorful, glittery, and awesome clothes! When they want me to see something they turn me around and open my eyes so that i can catch the picture they are impressed."

Updates:
My owner gives me some numbers to memorize but sometimes i get too many that i just eliminate some of them. When my owner gets mad at me, he just tells me some words that i really don’t like to hear from his mouth. He gets mad when i am too slow, or when i forget about some numbers, etc. I really appreciate them a lot, but i have that weird feeling, of guiltiness, and i would much rather to have my sisters, or brothers to take my place.
Can u guys give me feed back?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • jelly...

    congrats, i couldn't write sth like this :(

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What Guys Said 1

What Girls Said 2

  • It sounds like a really personal essay. argh...

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  • it sounds good!

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