I hate myself and I don't know what to do about it?

I'm just at a breaking point now.
Up until I was around 13, I was fairly outgoing. I was a super outgoing little kid and I always had a ton of friends. I don't know what changed but eventually I became more and more shy.
Once high school started it got really bad. I have social anxiety. I rarely go through drive throughs and I prefer self checkouts. I get really nervous easily and I'm constantly at least a little embarrassed. Its even gotten to a point where I'm no longer completely comfortable around family and close friends.
I assume most people dislike me or are thinking negatively of me. When I'm being stared at I assume that the person is judging how I look. I often think I'm being stared at when I'm not as well.
I think I'm bad at most things, to the point where I won't do anything that involves use of skill around others because I think I'll be bad and embarrass myself. Everything about me is embarassing to me. Every situation has the potential to be very embarassing to me.
I rarely look in the mirror at my face unless I have to and when I do I dim the lights. I very very rarely take pictures and when I do I delete them, except a couple.
I only take pictures with others when drunk.

I'm even embarassed when someone says I'm attractive (not a common occurrence) because I know I'm not and I think they've either got really low standards or they're just being stupid. I get asked out/have guys ask for my number often enough I guess (I think about 3-4 have asked for my # since February) and I've had a couple guys admit to liking me, I've had my fair share trying to just get in my pants, but again I just think they have low standards. It never makes me feel better.

I'm really insecure about everything and it makes impossible to be intimate with someone. I can't talk about how I feel and I can't show them who I truly am because I'm ashamed of myself. I hate myself so much and it is ruining my life. I don't know what to do anymore.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Whoa... long essay to read but that's fine, love it.
    Didn't felt this was too long when you are writing it? Because you were mainly concentrating about the current situation...
    See, this is my point, always think about the future... What is about to happen... Not about now, because tomorrow there will be another 'now' and you will start counting them...
    Its true, people change, today is not the same as yesterday and you got to adopt to it because that's what life is. You fall but you got to get up.. getup! And walk, breaks those barriers and never let anyone pull you down. Even your own self.

    You said that you have started hating your life. Tell me one, just one reason. Why? Give me one reasonable answer?
    Nothing!. Its you the one who brings your self down, so you need to motivate your self. You need to look in to that mirror and see the true beauty in you because ''everything starts within you" you just have to find what it is and to start developing it.

    It maybe because of your age I guess, because it happens, maybe due to depression but that's normal... You can start spending time with yourself... you can teach yourself how important you are because its your life! You live it and you make your own rules... Don't let anyone decided who your going to be...

    Also I apologize for the confusing opinion... I mean I wish if I can tell you more but, I don't know where to begin...

    But the last word I want say is that,
    Start enjoying your moment, live in the future and never let you bring yourself down.. because your life comes first!
    Good luck ^^
    Cheers!!

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    • Also shit! I am totally confusing you I guess ahah 😂😂
      But just want to add one last thing...
      Don't ever, ever even bother to think what others think about you if you, think that its the right thing for you!

      ** start watching movies, read books... spend more time getting busy with other stuff... play an instrument... There is something special in everyone... Some like music, some like games, find what's yours... You have it in you!
      Just don't let the darkness swollo you up.

What Guys Said 3

  • Focus on improving your own self image. You are too concerned with other peoples opinions of you when your opinion of yourself is the only one that matters. It does get easier as you work through ways to change from being ashamed of yourself to being proud of yourself.

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  • It sounds like a form of depression to me. I think you should see a psychologist. You should probably go on antidepressants for a while.
    Your psychologist will explain to you how they work. That's if you get a good psychologist.
    Talk to your doctor about it to get the ball rolling.

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    • I've been on antidepressants/mood stabilizers for 3 years now, and I've tried a lot. My depression is much more manageable but this problem remains

  • Go get evaluated at a (what's a good term) mental facility I guess you could call it that. I went to one for being suicidal and at first the idea sounds bad, but it helps.

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What Girls Said 3

  • there's nothing wrong with you at all, and you have no reason to hate yourself. other people clearly see attractive traits in you that you may not see in yourself. social anxiety as a mental illness often kicks in around the beginning of adolescence, and can be helped by doctors. maybe see a psychologist about your issues, they will be able to help you better. :)

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  • i understand your feelings dear... and all I have to say is this... learn to love yourself and if it's hard find someone who loves you and work from there

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  • you should see a counselor.

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