Guys, do you agree that guys should make the first move? Or do you prefer that women do it first?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I don't think either should *have* to do it.

    I think many women for some reason get this idea in the heads that because they have an inclination toward being approached it means that guys naturally want to play the corresponding part. I don't believe that's the case, why can't approaching someone just be a scarey thing for everyone? I'd prefer to have people make the first move toward me.

    I don't like women who refuse to ask guys out, it's just very off-putting. That doesn't mean I expect them to come to me.

    I think women should be encouraged to go for it more and discouraged from waiting around. I'd like things to be closer to 50/50 when it comes to making the first move. I'm ok if guys do naturally do it a little more, say 60/40, it may just naturally happen that way. But no girl should ever be sitting around waiting or dropping all these silly hints and expecting something to happen.

    Shyness is cute but it isn't an excuse, guys can be shy too. Just because a guy is interest doesn't mean he'll be able to make a move. If you like someone then go for it.

    I don't like people who buy into that gender roles BS. If I was going to or have made the first move and I find out how intent you are on being passive, especially if you're a confident person, then I'm going to back out and you'll regain my interest and gain respect for coming to me.

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What Guys Said 20

  • whomever is interrested.
    So that means, if you want someone, then go for it. The only excuse is you being a chicken. Nothing more, nothing less.

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  • I think anyone can ask anyone out but I prefer it when a girl makes a move on me. I know I won't treat her with disrespect even if I'm not interested but I can't say that women will treat my time or feelings with respect if they are not interested because personal experience has shown me that many will not. Getting rejected is much less cruel than being given false hope or radio silence.

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    • That's not to say men can't be rude or disrespectful either or that women should always approach I'm just explaining why I personally prefer the woman to come to me, there is just a lot less headache and heartache in it for me and I will respect a woman for being upfront.

  • Doesn't really matter who wants to make the first move. However, if you want the guy to make the first move then you should somehow communicate to the guy that you want him to approach you.

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  • I don't think either gender should be obligated to make the first move in ALL situations. I believe that it should be 50/50.

    I'd actually prefer that women made the first move, but i don't think they should be the only ones to do it (and it never happens anyway).

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  • Girls always make the first move, always has been that way. It seems like guys make the first because they pace their feet and step up to the plate. Girl sees guy, girl catches guys eye, girl smiles at guy, guy walks over, guy introduces himself, guy strikes conversation and asks girl out.

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  • Neither has to, but if they want to and don't, that is on them.

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  • It doesn't matter what I think. If I want to get laid with any regularity, I have to do it.

    But it's great when women signal interest.

    And as a shy guy, of course it helps on those rare occasions where a woman makes a move. But at the end of the day I just have to suck it up.

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    • I wish someone had drilled into my skull that I had to do this from an early age.

      Instead, I've mostly heard stories about how guys are "creepy" etc., which doesn't exactly make it easier.

  • i don´t see any good reason why a guy would have the obligation, given that girls are so hard pressed to gain equality in every other field.

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  • I'm extremely shy, so I prefer the woman making the first move. Ideally, both guys and girls should be willing to make the first move. Whoever is interested and not shy, really

    Unfortunately, women don't make the first move often. At least, not yet. They outright refuse to, where I live.

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  • I think either gender can make first move

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  • I think either one should be able to make the move. I wish I had the courage to do so myself, but right now, it's not the case.

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  • I don't mind who makes the first move
    but if you're interested, don't delay by waiting for the other and just go for it

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  • Whoever feels like it's the right course of action to do.

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  • Sometimes i really feel women should make the move you know especially if he is a shy guy

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  • It's not a preference, but this is the 21st century. Women should assume equal risk in all things.

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  • Immaterial.

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  • Not a generalisation but for me girl would probably start as I get so nervous. Had a hard time asking someone as subtly as possible if they had a boyfriend. Nerves of steel? Nerves of tissue paper.

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  • both parties equally

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  • women have to give a sign or else we get called creeps

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  • If a girl makes the first move a guy knows what she is feeling. Some girls can be complicated.

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