I was raised as a very strict Christian as a child that put me in a constant state of fear and anexity, as a child I was told by my farther as I was learning in school if I told him that if I was learning about evolution that If I started to allow that way of thinking satantic forces will start to eat at you and then you will be handed over and be cast in to the lake of fire for forever when you die. I was told I was told that I was not allowed to watch certain telly programmes on telly that I wanted to watch such as Harry Potter or buffy. As they where of the devil and not allowed to be watched. I watched to watch certain programmes thought I was being tempted by him and that I should have greater control as I was afraid I was going to burn forever in the lake of fire.
As a child I Was a very nervous child as you may of guessed and completely ruined my childhood and ruined my adult life as I had no confidence as i Was Anexious every second of the day and in a constant state of fear.
When I went to college I started to develop relationships and we grew closer together she wanted to go further in the bedroom and so did I and want to follow my urges but felt and great shame and guilt that I was no longer waiting till marriage and I was not saving myself I never got till sex just dry humping and fingering but that's not everything. I ended the relationship as I thought I was not write With God and I was going to be cast out to hell. I regret so much ending with this girl called Anna as I thought I was being tempted by satan. I really regret it I broke her heart so much she was so in love so much. It now kills me I belived what my dad told me I am starting to get a real hatred for my dad for ruining it. And if there was anything I could do to get Anna back I would turn over every stone to have her back.
Christianity is a cheap form of control of making people more productive of society wherever they are in the world. And just controls them using Shame and gu
Most Helpful Girl
I know exactly what you're going through because i grew up the exact same way. I grew up in a very strict Christian church and as i got older, i couldn't stand it. I couldn't go to the college of my choice because their uniforms includes pants, but my church taught me that women aren't allowed to wear pants, only long dresses and long skirts. So i missed out on that. I was never allowed to go to the fun places like the beach, the movies or the fair. I wasn't allowed to have braids in my hair. No jewelry or makeup. I couldn't watch anything with cussing, magic, sex, hot making out or even monsters. I was not allowed to date. But the pastors and his fave members were allowed to do whatever, just not me and the rest. I hated it!
So finally I had enough. I was 19 when i left that cult church. I'm still a Christian. Why? Because i love God and received Jesus into my life. Just as long as I'm still saved and living right to God's Will, I'll nvr go to hell. The same goes for everyone.
Now i style my hair anyway that i want. I'm finally in the college with the pants uniform (classes started on Monday for me and I'm doing great so far with God's Help) , I having a sexy boyfriend who loves me and makes sure I'm alright. I go to a much better church that truly loves God, but don't try to control what u do or wear, longs it's decent. I'm a lot happier now.1