Did my father ever love my mother?

I must go anon for this in case he finds it.

But my father used to financially abuse my mother, he also used to hit her, he demanded she cook him food even when she had cancer and had months to live. Also, she had a broken arm and she was still cooking for him. Furthermore, he used to belittle her and tell her off and force her to go to church all the time.

Now, he claims he loved my mother but yet. He has never visited her grave, he bearly wept at her funeral and was trying to move onto another woman within 1 week after she died.

Did he ever love her?

  • Yes
    6% (1)17% (1)9% (2)Vote
  • No
    94% (15)83% (5)91% (20)Vote
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Most Helpful Girl

  • In my opinion, no. I don't think that you can abuse your partner and show them so much disrespect and truly love them. I can believe that he thinks he loved her, but I don't think that he actually could if he treated her so badly. Of course, no one is going to be able to give you a 100% sure answer, because no one can know.

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What Girls Said 6

  • Sometimes there is love, but people have different beliefs or can't stand each other. In your father's case, he might have loved your mother or he might not have. He wasn't treating her well, he soulds like a controlling and selfish person, and someone who thinks women are lesser than men. Though, he might have loved her regardless.. Still, it's clear they shouldn't be together.

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  • sorry but no... he didn't loved your mom... he is an abusive person

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  • From your description i do not think he did. You can not harm someone you love because.

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  • He loved? those just words. Words to cover his abuse. What a manipulative liar.

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    • He used to justify his teasing of me by saying it was to toughen me up. I personally hate him and hope he rots in hell forever.

    • Is his life better currently speaking?

  • He sounds incapable of love, quite sociopathic.

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  • No, love is compassion and caring for others even at their worst times. Your dad did the opposite.

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What Guys Said 6

  • N, i don't think he loved her. I'm so sorry for this... I love my wife so much and it would literally KILL me to even raise my hand at her, women have such a kind heart and they add so much color to life, i just don't understand why men do this... your wife is supposed to be the best part of life that's why you married her. When you do get married and find the girl you love... always treasure her and respect her and show her that you love her... why? because the women you choose is worth it. Best thing you can do for your mum is to have respect for women :)

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  • I think that is something between you and your father - You are grieving your mother and things are very raw for you.

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    • Well, I am normal. It's normal to grieve someone who was so close to you. He isn't grieving.

    • @Asker, I think that what he might be trying to say is that during grief, emotions are very raw, and grief causes lots of different ones - anger is probably one of the most common. Whilst you're grieving, your anger will be heightened and you're more likely to lash out at others. Your anger at your mother's death would influence to you be angry at your father for the way he's coping with it. (If I'm wrong @KDA20 I'm sorry for speaking for you! :P )

  • That's terrible...

    Are you going to do something about this? Confront your father?

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    • I have confronted him on numerous occasions, even when she was alive. He basically told me to mind my own business, told me he would bash me up (he has tried and he used to when I was like 2). He wanted me to fear him and tremble before him. But now I just call the cops

    • Get a game... Called Assassins creed 3...

      It'll probably inspire you to do things ;D

  • Love is shown by actions and not words.

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  • You answered yourself.

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    • Not really, people make mistakes. I just wanted a 3rd party's opinion on it.

    • Like, we all lose our temper at times. But his persistence in this area made me wonder.

  • ye i loved ur mother very much :)

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