How do you boost your self-esteem?

A few horrible things have happened to me this year (basically I was sexually assaulted, and half my friends took his side) and now I feel like shit.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You need to consider that the friends who couldn't be by your side aren't worth it
    and that karma will get him for what he did to you and no matter who you are trust
    me any guy whose willing to take his time with you. would love you with all of his heart
    just gotta keep your chin up girl and you know you better days are coming for you
    www.desibucket.com/.../A-Big-Hug-For-You.jpg

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I know how it feels to feel violated like that. I was so shaky and distraught afterwards. But you just have to think about how you can make yourself stronger so that never happens again. Put a smile on your face and lift your chin up, it will drive that guy insane. Show him it didn't hurt you, that's true strength. Look to the sun with hopeful eyes, and everything will be alright!

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    • Thank you so much 😊❤️

    • That was beautiful, love this opinion

    • You're very welcome, I'm glad I could help even if only a little bit. And thank you, Rahdle. (:

What Guys Said 18

  • It is not easy. It takes a long time and a lot of work. Really it is a "fake it til you make it" situation.
    a couple of years ago, and most of my life before, I was the same way. I had very little self confidence or self esteem.
    I went through an unwanted divorce after 25 years together, more then half my life. I found out some disturbing things. But I got out there and had a lot of success.
    I think the fact that the divorce has hardened me is good and bad. It was good for the purpose of boosting self confidence and dating for really the first time in my life. and that is scary when your in your mid-40's. I never really dated when I was young. I went out with 5 women before meeting my ex wife. I never had a "girlfriend".
    But I had a lot of success. I dated 9 women from mid-march 2014 to beginning of June. Realized I was really not ready to date and stopped. Tried again in August. Then waited until December to start again. Dated one woman in January of this year. I have been with someone since February of this year.
    Of the 13 I went on dates with, 8 went at least 3 dates and I had sex with 6. So each time built my confidence more and more.
    I never took any breakup personally. I examined what went wrong, adjusted my approach, and proceeded to the next woman.
    I knew I made it when I was talking to my therapist and explained why i broke up with a woman. I just said "I don't need to feel the way I did. I can just find someone else". she was surprised since I have never said something like that before.
    .

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  • That is a horrible thing to experience and I'm sorry you had to go through something like this..

    Keep you're head up okay?
    The real friends will take your side. If they took his side they weren't true friends.
    Just don't feed fire to this situation any more than what has already been done.
    If they talk to you about it tell them the truth, if they call you out about it set them straight. Thinks will work themselves out..

    Focus on something else. I would recommend your career. Whether you are studying/working or something else build and grow a career. Or whatever you choose :).
    You are precious and deserve better so value yourself more, you are not in the wrong! do things that make you happy and love yourself. It's really hard to explain because we are all different people. But I hope you find something.

    P. S I hope you have a wonderful day and I hope you live happily. I'll send you love over the interwebs <3

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    • Thanks 😊❤️ That made me feel so much better

  • I'm so sorry. But life will get better. I too feel terribly depressed this year. If you ever wanna talk about it, I'm a good listener

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    • Thanks 😊 I'll definitely consider messaging you later

    • You don't have to by any means. But if it might make you feel just a little better, I'd love to help

  • First thing you should do is get new friends. second thing you should do is press charges. then take the money you get go get a mani, pedi, facial. should help you feel better about yourself.

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  • Do something new and challenging. It doesn't have to have anything to do with what happened. The work of whatever you do will occupy your mind instead of dwelling on the situation, and creating accomplishments for yourself will make you feel better about yourself.

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  • going to the gym and putting in some hard work gives a sense of accomplishment and releases pent up stress. proven to lift your mood.

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  • Drawing from personal experience I have a feeling you are scared... true or false?
    Like you cannot trust anyone anymore simply because a majority took his side?
    And you cannot trust those close to you because of what he did?

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    • Yeah, I am kinda scared. It's hard to ask for help too.

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    • Thank you 😊❤️

    • PM me if you need some 1 on 1 help:)

  • It's sad how often it takes a terrible thing like that to find out who your real friends are. Just remember, that is a reflection on THEM, not on you.

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  • Do things I'm amazing at and ignore the things I'm horrible at haha

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  • wear a pair of aviators and you'll automatically feel like a badass.

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  • very annoyingly, by having it
    telling yourself you have guts gives you them. it's not something you try, only something you can do :)

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  • I talk to someone that loves kissing ass

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  • I think your best bet is t go to theraphy and get your trauma inc check before the PSTD kicks in

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  • I think the best advice i can give you is to not give up on people.
    Don't be afraid to make new friends and start new relations.
    Being surrounded with people wil boost your self-esteem :)

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  • damn... i'm sorry.

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  • List all your positives and you'll see that you are amazing

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  • Fuck em! You don't need em. Better off with the other half. :)

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  • sorry to hear about that. occasionally i'll come across motivational stuff on youtube. if something really speaks to me, i'll save it to my computer. if i need a boost i'll open that folder and watch a few.

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What Girls Said 8

  • Do something you are good at.

    Examples? How about swimming, running, dancing, cooking, gardening, climbing, painting, writing. If possible, it should be something that holds your attention and requires enough focus to get you into that state of ''flow'' where you forget about everything else.

    You will feel more competent, accomplished and capable afterwards, great antidotes to low self esteem.

    Good luck.

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    • Thanks 😊 I'll try doing one of them

  • first off im sorry this happened to you, and im sorry your so called friends turned out to be such terrible people. i would try getting involved in something that you are interested in, or volunteering for a good cause. to relieve stress and build confidence in yourself. i would also recommend some kind of physical activity, because it is very good for relieving stress. i would especially recommend some sort of martial arts, since getting to beat things out into a punching bag feels pretty good, plus you will know how to defend yourself giving you a greater sense of security. if it helps you get in shape, that's just a bonus. it will also allow you to make new connections, with people who probably aren't asshats. doing this has worked for me to reduce anxiety, boost my moral, and helps me when i get depressed. also maybe pick up a hobby, reading, arts, music, baking, anime (my fave and i can recommend some good stuff to you ). i hope this helps, and feel free to dm me if you want to talk about whatever.

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    • Show All
    • well for starters there gurren lagen, naruto, one piece, kill la kill - action adventuring death note, black butler, tokyo ghoul, attack on titans, fullmetal alchemist/ brotherhood- more horror/ psychological shimoneta, hetalia, lucky star, is this a zombie? -comedy// everyday kind of stuff i hope you enjoy any of these if you watch them :)

    • I've actually seen death note before and it's really good. Thanks for the other suggestions too 😊

  • *looks into the mirror* Oh Doctor, you're so handsome. Yes I am, thank you.

    ~Oh wait, that was the wrong one. Hey, but it works.😂

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  • Fake it till u make it.

    I used to have no self esteem but now I'm really confident

    Try to find new hobbies and enjoy life.

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  • I boost my self esteem by staring in the mirror.

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  • I hate to ask but it's really chewing at me...
    How were you sexually assaulted? Why would people take his side?

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    • It's ok, he kept groping me after I told him I didn't want it and he keeps telling everyone that I did want it

  • Do positive things to benefit others and do it in secret. This will give you the confidence to believe you are a good person who makes good contributions to this world.

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  • I know this may sound cliche but see a counselor. Also, try to do things that make you happy. Try to join a group of people who have common interest in something you may like

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